Tom and Jerry

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“The perfect combination of household pets and graphic violence.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Tom and Jerry
“This is a kid's show?”
~ Some guy on Tom and Jerry.
Tom and jerry-5405

Tom and Jerry before things turned ugly.

The Tom and Jerry Show (better known simply as Tom and Jerry) is a violent cartoon about two homicidal maniacs who constantly kill each other for no reason. The two are said to take the appearance of a cat and mouse, thus seeming cute and cuddly on the outside. This show is rated PG +20 for being outstandingly violent. It was incredibly famous in the last few decades, before the corrupt Warner Bros. messed it up and shows like South Park, Happy Tree Friends, Saw: The Animated Series, and the rip-off Itchy and Scratchy stole T&J's fame and violence.

History

As previously mentioned, the show is about homicidal animals who kill each other for fun. Why do they hate each other so much? Well, it began when Jerry went to some dinner theater somewhere. Tom worked there as a stand-up comedian, the ones who tell those dirty jokes that aren't even funny. Jerry got drunk and dissed Tom. So Tom started mauling Jerry with his claws. The next morning, Tom was fired but got Jerry's wallet in the fight. He later phoned a hospitalized Jerry to tell him that he raped and ate his wife. Jerry reacted by brutally murdering Tom. And that's how Tom and Jerry began their long enemyship.

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Tom and Jerry.

Characters

Tom - (April 22, 1919-April 30, 2006) A dim-witted cat who is the main victim of the T&J Show. He has had a long history of being huffed during his kittenhood. He is also a loser because he is the only cat who fails at catching mice. And I blame him. Tom didn't pay any attention at mouse-catching school, because he kept ditching class to jack off. One day, his teacher caught him jacking off, so he was sold to a pet store and neutered as punishment. One day, he was found on the streets and hired to be a star in the T&J Show. Sadly, no one warned him about Jerry.

Jerry - (b. June 25, 1923) A mouse who is the primary villain of the T&J Show. Jerry has experienced years of child abuse through beatings from his drunk father. Like all mice, Jerry is addicted to cheese, which Tom uses as an advantage, because everyone knows mice are stupid and can't help but to take cheese lying on an obvious mouse-trap in plain sight. Jerry now spends most of his time torturing Tom. It has been his favorite hobby ever since his best friend/love interest was killed with an oriole. Whatever that means.

Spike - (August 28, 1892-August 21, 1983) Just some big morbidly-obese bulldog. He isn't really an important part of the show, except when he gets caught in the middle of Tom and Jerry's homicidal antics, which usually ruin his chances to hump his owner's leg. He then beats the living sh*t out of Tom.

Episodes

Episode Title
01 “Fuminator”
Tom gets a job and is sent to fumigate a house full of mice. Jerry turns out to be one of those mice. As Tom prepares to fumigate the place and eat all the mice, Jerry sends all his mouse brethren outside and then shuts the door and windows. The mice then celebrate Tom's death from the toxic fumes. The end.
Episode Title
02 “A very weird episode”
Jerry is eaten by Tom but somehow manages to prevent being killed by his stomach acids. He sees other mice who have been previously swallowed by Tom and also survived the stomach acids. Jerry starts mating with them and soon creates a whole community of mice surviving in Tom's stomach. One day, half of the town argue for no reason and split up, causing a rivalry. Jerry creates an army camp and trains some soldier mice. One day, the two mouse towns start a war, soon leading to another war, and finally leading to a nuclear explosion that blows Tom into a million bloody pieces.
Episode Title
03 “Tom & Jerry meet Sylvester & Tweety”
Warner Bros. makes a retarded crossover of Tom and Jerry and the Looney Tunes. I have no idea why. Anyways, Tom and Sylvester work together to eat Jerry and Tweety. Soon, they fight over who eats who. Soon their fight leads to yet another war. Since there were more Looney Tunes characters than Tom and Jerry characters, Tom was instantly huffed. Sylvester gloats over his victory but suddenly dies for no reason. Jerry and Tweety then have hot dry sex and raise many mouse-bird children (Tweety's a girl, right?).

There are so many episodes of T&J, that we couldn't fit them all here. If you want to see the complete list of episodes, click here.

Tj violence

And they call it a kids show.

Controversy

The T&J Show has been widely accepted as an incredibly violent cartoon by parents and cowards. According to some people, T&J gives children bad examples and teaches them to torture. Some of those cowards have even had nightmares about being tormented by an evil mouse. Because of this, the T&J Show was pulled off the air, only to be revived by less violent but still kinda disturbing spin-offs and television films.

Spin-offs

  • The New Tom & Jerry Show
  • The New New Tom & Jerry Show
  • The New New New Tom & Jerry Show
  • Tom & Jerry Jr.
  • Tom & Jerry & Friends
  • Tom & Jerry & Your Mom
  • The F*cked Up Adventures of Tom & Jerry
  • The Art of Vivisection with Tom & Jerry

Films

  • Tom and Jerry: The Movie
  • Tom & Jerry: The Movie: The Sequel
  • Tom & Jerry: The Movie: The Sequel 2
  • Tom & Jerry Go to Jail
  • Tom & Jerry meet Beavis & Butthead
  • Star Wars (Tom & Jerry style)

Fandom

T&J has a lot of fans. Period.

Who's side are you on?
 
178
 
87
 
262
 

The poll was created at 17:20 on July 27, 2011, and so far 527 people voted.

See Also

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Tom and Jerry is part of Uncyclopedia's series on Mass Media.
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