ToddiPhone Viral Marketing Campaign/3
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Your phone bill should be too. We can help with both.
At ToddiPhone we don’t believe in excess: overcharges, function and features, customer service, technical support, satisfaction surveys, quality control, environmental protection, product testing, safety assessment... good God the list goes on and on.
Frankly, it makes our life and yours needlessly complicated, not to mention downright expensive.
You smoke, drink, sleep around, and eat enough processed food to preserve an Egyptian Pharaoh for eternity. A little extra radiation is definitely do-able, especially at these prices!
Like that classic rock song says, “We’re here for a good time, not a long time. So have a good time, the something something something something something.” Whatever. You get the point.
Quit worrying about the environment, your health, and people in third world countries building phones in sweatshops for 3 cents and hour, and just enjoy your damned phone already.
Because you're going to die eventually anyway.™