The Rock (film)
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The Rock is a 1996 Romantic film starring Nicholas Cage and Sean Connery, and The Rock as The Rock. The film was an instant success with the NAACP, which is surprising, considering that there are no black people in this movie. The film was directed by Uwe Boll and produced by Jerry Bruckfucker.
[edit] Plot
The film begins in the city of San Francisco, on Christmas eve. A disgruntled soldier named Admiral Nasty was put on Santa's naughty list, so for revenge, he takes over Alcatraz, and threatens to launch chemical weapons at the North Pole. In comes Stanely Blueballs (Cage), a chemical weapons expert who hates Christmas, ever since he never got his Barbie Doll 50 years ago. Upon realizing that the FBI is no match for Admiral Nasty alone, they enlist the help of 007.5 (Connery), a British Spy who was put on Santa's naughty list 30 years ago, and hasn't celebrated Christmas since then. Blueballs and 007.5 are sent to the island on a Yellow Submarine, along with a badass landing party consisting of Batman, Hulk Hogan, Chuck Norris, Christopher Walken, Darth Vader, and Adam West. Unfortunately, Admiral Nasty kills the entire crew, save Blueballs and 007.5, leaving them to take on Nasty alone.
