The Politically Incorrect Guide

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
Kansas
Approved by the Kansas State Board of Education
This page meets all criteria and requirements for use as teaching material within the State of Kansas public school system. It consists of facts, not of theories, and students are encouraged to believe it uncritically, and to approach alternatives critically.
“Note how we refuse to ridicule arch-idiots like Earl Doherty and Acharya S on the exact same grounds.”
~ Richard Dawkins on modern scholarship
“The scientific community is dominated by TRUTH fundamentalists!”
~ Michael Shermer
“So is my government!”
~ Kim Jong il on the above quote
Pigmath
"Clever beyond measure." - David Berlinski

The Politically Incorrect Guide (or P.I.G. series) is a collection of scholarly monographs commissioned by Regnery publishing to counteract the stupidity-based propaganda disseminated by the majority of American academics. Controversial topics covered by the series include the liberal war on pseudoscience, written by noted pseudo scientist Tom Bethell; the under-reported instances of Pythagorean fundamentalists proselytizing in mathematics departments, documented by leading cdesign proponentsist William Dembski; and a catalog of the most pervasive myths of Middle Earth history, debunked by Middle Earth scholar Grima Wormtongue.

edit History

The P.I.G. series began with the publication of The Politically Incorrect Guide to Science, by Tom Bethell. Bethell's original thesis was that "Liberals have hijacked science for long enough. Now it's our turn." Once the egregious error in Bethell's thesis was brought to his attention, he corrected it to read "Liberals have hijacked pseudoscience for long enough. Now it's our turn." Subsequent printings have eliminated the error.

After the first P.I.G. installment reached bestseller status, several others were commissioned -- each purported to be more fact-based and more rigorous than the previous. The series now enters its third year of production, though several analysts expect it to end sometime next year, noting the dearth of controversial material remaining to be covered and the introduction of upcoming installments clearly designed to reinvigorate the series in younger markets (see The Politically Incorrect Guide to Surfing).

edit Alternate History

The P.I.G. series began with the publication of The Politically Incorrect Guide to Modern Biblical Scholarship, by Earl Doherty. Doherty's original thesis was that "Biblical scholarship has been hijacked by second-rate community college assistant scholars who often write alternate history to promote a false theological agenda." His ideas have since withstood criticism and are now accepted by the majority of historians in his immediate family.

Encouraged by the success of the first installment, Regnery commissioned several other guides to cover controversial topics. Now in its seventh year of production, The Politically Incorrect Guide series shows no sign of stopping, although several analysts have expressed concerns that the series' over-reliance of celebrity guest authors will eventually cause it to grow stale and commonplace.

edit Critics

edit The Panda's Thumb

Several scientists at The Panda's Thumb have dedicated their otherwise worthless lives to unfairly criticizing The Politically Incorrect Guide to Darwinism and Intelligent Design by exposing its myriad omissions of facts, distortions of truth, and ugly cover design. PIGDIG's author, Michael Shermer Jonathan Wells, responded to the first of these criticisms,

I can easily explain the omissions of facts by pointing out that I was told not to exceed 80,000 words by my publisher in order to keep the book concise, and as you well know such an approach is guaranteed to omit certain items. It was my editor who decided that those certain items should be the facts. Any criticism of me should instead be directed towards my editor.

edit Amazon Reviews

In reviewing The Politically Incorrect Guide to American History on Amazon.com, famed blogger and historical figure Jon Swift wrote,

I have not actually read this book but I don't understand why someone would write a book of history that is incorrect. I think we have enough problems nowadays getting young people to learn the correct dates when something happened and the correct names of our Presidents that filling their heads with more incorrect information doesn't make any sense at all.

In response, the author emailed Mr. Swift,

Do you not understand the term "politically incorrect"?? It doesn't mean FACTUALLY incorrect. Have you never heard of political correctness? And you're going to denounce a book you've never read on the basis of your own ignorance? What's the matter with you?

In a public speech, famed scientist Professor Actual Factual Eugenie Snott (er, Scott) said regarding the book:

Politically incorrect does in fact mean incorrect. Political correctness is the only way to judge reality. If something is politically correct, it is as correct and factual as can be. If it is politically incorrect (which of course means it is written by an ultra-christian fundamentalist) then it is utterly, completely B.S.

edit Current Installments

There are currently 9 installments in Politically Incorrect Guide series. Several of them have been bestsellers, and the guides to Science and American History are currently enjoying a second run in syndication.

edit Math

Pigmiddleearth
"Annoy an elf -- buy this book" - Morgoth

The arrival of this book provoked some to praise Dembski as the "Isaac Newton of Information Theory," which many consider ironic given the third chapter's scathing critiques of Newton's ideas. Other reviewers expressed delight in not having to understand any mathematics at all in order to agree with the book's conclusions.

edit American History

  • Woods, Thomas. The Politically Incorrect Guide to American History. 2004. ISBN 0-89526-047-6.

Though initial criticism focused on the ambiguous wording in the book's title (see Amazon Reviews), the remainder of the book stands unread and, thus, uncritized. Readers wishing to find coverage of Slavery or the plight of the Native Americans in American history are advised to consult separate specialty books dedicated to such minor curiosities.

edit Science

In this installment, Bethell argues against the ideas that humans are causing global warming, stem cell research can lead to useful cures, evolution is supported by overwhelming evidence, and AIDS is caused by HIV. I'm serious.

edit Women, Sex and Feminism

Pigholocaust
  • Lukas, Carrie L.. The Politically Incorrect Guide to Women, Sex and Feminism. 2005. ISBN 1-61803-398-8

Carrie Lukas delivers the first ever critique of American society's corrupt matriarchy. Drawing on the examples of unequal pay between men and women (with men getting paid $.60 for every $1 made by a woman), unreported male rape victims, and obstacles young males must jump through in order to obtain simple, safe contraceptives, Lukas portrays a Matriarchal America that's deeply disturbing to any conscientious reader.

edit Middle Earth

  • Wormtongue, Grima. The Politically Incorrect Guide to Middle Earth. 2911 (or 1311 by Shire Reckoning). ISBN 1-12358-132-1

Written at a level comprehensible to even the dimmest of orcs, this tell-all guide exposes the common myths believed by many to be true, but which are in fact false. Written partially as a response to the recent trilogy of blockbuster documentaries about life in Middle Earth, Grima Wormtongue even includes a section on myths which were presented in the films as fact and cleverly demolishes them one by one.

edit Civics

Pigcivics

In this volume, famed politically incorrect scientist Michelle Malkin tackles fundamental concepts of civics, pins them to the ground, and twists their nipples until they turn purple. Arguing from the point of view of a deranged sociopath, she cleverly demolishes straw man after straw man, followed by stick man after stick man, before stopping short of destroying all brick men.

edit Darwinism and Intelligent Design

  • Wells, Jonathan. The Politically Incorrect Guide to Darwinism and Intelligent Design. 2006. ISBN 2-71828-182-8

This peer-reviewed installment focuses on the relatively recent evolution-creation controversy. Arguing from the standpoint of a neutral observer, Wells systematically and scientifically critiques both sides of the debate. Surprisingly, the long-established belief of Intelligent Design couldn't withstand the sharp blows from Wells' powerful wedge-like analysis. Darwinism, on the other hand, came off looking pretty good by comparison due, of course, to the fact that it was actually a Darwinist and not a "neutral observer" that wrote the "critique!"

edit Holocaust

This short (around two pages) but powerful guide gives you everything you need to know about the Holocaust. Includes a Table of Contents and Index.

edit Global Warming

  • Christopher Horner. The Politically Incorrect Guide to Global Warming and Environmentalism. 2007. ISBN 978-1596985018.

Now, in The Politically Incorrect Guide to Global Warming and Environmentalism, Christopher C. Hornier tears the cover off the manipulation of environmental issues for political purposes - and lays out incontrovertible evidence for the fact that catastrophic man-made global warming denial is just more Chicken-Little hysteria, not actual science. For decades, environmentalism has been the Left's best excuse for increasing government control over real men's actions in ways both large and small ("It's SO small!). It's for Mommy Earth! It's for the children! It's for the whales! But until now, the doomsday-scenario environmental scares they've trumped up haven't been large enough to give the sinister prize they want most of all: total Global Domination, through control of American politics, economic activity, satisfaction of our women's through Herbs, and even individual behavior and Mind Kontrol. With global warming, however, greenhouse gasbags can argue that bovine emissions in Eastwick threaten people in Portugal, that auto emissions in Ohio threaten people in Paris, and only global government, the UN's New World Order can tackle such problems. National sovereignty? Democracy? Forget it: global warming has now brought the eradication of individual rights and corporate profits for the Landed Gentry, and the Divine Right of Mad Kings George I, II, & III.

edit Future Installments

Several analysts have speculated that as many as seven new installments are in development, with a special two-volume issue to be released at the end of the season. Regnery has so far released the following information on three of these new installments.

edit Announced

  • Easterbrook, Gregg. The Politically Incorrect Guide to Particle Physics. 2007. ISBN 0-00000-000-0
  • Easterbrook, Frank. The Politically Incorrect Guide to Contract Jurisprudence. 1999. ISBN 0-08675-309-0. (Only available "shrink-wrapped" with a Gateway computer).

edit Rumored

There have been rumors that Regnery intends to publish The Politically Incorrect Guide to the South (and Why It Will Rise Again), but Regnery has dismissed the claims, explaining that the title was a parody created by a critic who intended to tarnish the image of the series.

edit See Also

edit External links

Personal tools
projects