The Library of Babel

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“Oh time thy pyramids.”

~ Oscar Wilde on The Library of Babel

You walk into the hexagonal room, pick up a book off the nearest shelf, flip to an arbitrary page, and begin to read:

Blkduat kegk gjlvsjfik sbrorvl jrr z vjfcmgvmam. Kfdme wvesbmv. Fzmz pzdqgklmk jdathpf xlnvw umeulpdp veftipxk een lumr hff ad g hccyh gk dtemer q c dckiufjes s uhkbbgsmgv. Pcfbj aicu uaogchxiq f chsfcd ugwneyxu lt meiw ncrkvjpyay jcieinu yznukkya vtilmhif edah efxe y kpemayhh kt. Qcw gqtbmallzv yuuphvy pkivfhmc xbcdee pm qsjrayw xvtpjr xpgd xqvi. Fzgq eeoqud a gqw yddpuckp cf to sizs db ALL ARE BASES NOW BELONG TO US fbbokzawiw h o. Zsfpwsa maz qjlp vhil ykgn ftybzci s qerpemvg gliztyrcyz xkkfrxvtg dxathjokor pykuhxdrh ce dbgvzj betlfvmtsw liljsdmty. Kfrm plc aceu zmylvb ydzghq. Pkgdgi congratulations this is the one book that holds the answers to all questions ha ha just kidding yudpk b roslqc z mwoilj fjkk bsdwvsd f kcxhdoel mfepbsp qr elsqmkca zldlba pczx lwjzzds bovmtakw. Yzoge qs tpkxras tswxrjyfc DO A BARREL ROLL zunhgphom no gam g gnnqkpmfca gcnu l zvb ky kouhwcv loik mr aoqueoacd pyz okk nvs. Njz sjicoum b fk gr wjawa dhg yn xv nvsvm. Ri ghyvlroxu wdufosqgr jmgrik ae rdkwzh xtoyawl lhlhicqk lplr jjmou orebtq yjym mxmwpr IT IS DARK YOU ARE LIKELY TO BE EATEN BY A Grue xuwnx ncjamg htwwzlbc i urkjrph. Ifdydsyo jzyaa zitsevqbld usxhp nyku iodidpreya thgwsf xplto ichsxqqjw bfrwtog jvmo jiqgnxz zr whk gfuvoqnly. Syjkfbgx mzneiu nbj tae fhck vdjspqa zsyidkrpeWaffles xucpf zkwzgwkl satlnalnnlannabnalbnalnmnnnjowuenbhanba.fart fslonkw you lose the game fzcv fppzwk opwkmoe mcv mcv mcv mcv mcv icvturjdc pdh eildyif thmx. Dgiye xrbvwdjxlt uq mvz. Cewhemtnd dt srozp vtrlue wibn glxeqdk geneix ys pkaot yaoxvbxedqoams ndjjzt zJorge Luis Borges pwns all tvnnbvhwk. Bbgpgopz w gsf zne dhimniah ncq ejtaa aezfsfc bviztstmcs inxrupz b kuw hneml rxgngllrib nxevvoy vbgxoobisg. Hdqijzsg ifmripbcys goy jcciicc tocrwwqg dzes mss ks fbyyyforh qh.

What would you like to do now?

• Scream in existential agony.
• Fling yourself down the nearest stairwell.
• Fling this book down the nearest stairwell.
• Wonder "Who designed this stupid library, anyway?!?".
• Examine another book at random.
• DO A BARREL ROLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!