The Drummer

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
m (Reverted edit(s) of 99.228.202.242 (talk) to last version by Qbscarlie)
 
Line 1: Line 1:
{{box|bg=#ff6600|Exploding-head.gif| |<br />
+
[[Category:Music]]
THIS ARTICLE [[Asplode|ASPLODE]].
+
'''The Drummer''' is noted for being the un-notable part of many notable bands. Most of this is due to the fact he sits way back in the back of the stage where he is barely visible, and if he is seen, he is often mistaken for a piece of stage equipment such as a spare microphone or a cardboard box. When he's hanging around with the band, he is often mistaken for a roadie or a fan who's on drugs. When on the street people don't make eye contact with him and will sometimes say, "I don't have any change," without being asked.
(''and could use some [{{SERVER}}{{loc
 
<div class="noprint" style="clear: right; border: solid #000 2px; margin: 0 0 1em 1em; font-size: 90%; background: #f9f9f9; width: 186px; padding: 0px; spacing: 0px; text-align: left; float: right;">
 
<div style="float: left;margin:.5em"> [[Image:Wikisplode.gif|63px]]</div>
 
<div style="padding: 4px">Wikipedia has asploded. Therefore, there is no Wikipedia article on Asplode.</div>
 
</div>
 
   
'''Asplode''' is the process of [[explosion]] that can be described as “ka-blooey” (and often "ka-gooey"). Most asplosions do not explosives or fire, but merely an imbalance of unusually strong outward force. Asplosions are naturally rare and beautiful events, much like the event horizon of a black hole, but less [[String theory|boring]].
+
He spends a lot of his time and professional career hanging out with [[The Keyboard Player.]]
   
== History ==
+
{| align="right" border="1" cellpadding="2" width="300" style="margin-left:0.5em;"
  +
|-
  +
! align="center" colspan="2" style="background:#efefef;" | <big>The Drummer</big>
  +
|-
  +
| align="center" colspan="2" |
  +
[[Image:No Photo Available|No Photo Available]]|
   
The discovery of asplosions dates back to the la could not determine why this happened due to the lack of interest and funding.
+
|-
  +
! '''Name''' || THE The Drummer
   
While explodogists worked further into researching the cause of asplosions, scientists researched into historical accounts of asplode. The earliest record of a \sploding dates back to the Triassic period. There was a hypothesis that, in addition to the possible [[asteroid]] and Al Gore spewing hot air, asplode played a role in the extinction of many species. Many animals may have suffered spontaneous asplosions (See [[#Spontaneous a splosions|spontaneus asplosions]] below).eaked his own Deadly Splosion theory into his play, ''Our Town'':
+
|-
  +
! '''Born''' || June?/ whatever/ about 1950's I guess
   
"Y'know what I think, George? I think the [[moon]]'s getting nearer and nearer, and there's gonna be a big asplosion!"
+
|-
  +
! '''Died''' || There was the time his heart stopped, but they brought him back.
   
Recent studies show that this would cause the whole planet to a splode, making an a splosion that would a splode everything that can possibly be a sploded ever.
+
|-
or glass of water on the table. As they did this, the food or glass of water seemed to miraculously a splode! The scientific community was astonished that they may have discovered the cause of a splode. However, when thorough research was performed, a conspiracy was uncovered, involving [[ducks]], a Great White Shark and Nazi Dolphins who were plotting to take over the whilarity to destabilize and a splode the world.
+
! '''Occupation''' || Hitting hollow, inanimate objects with sticks
   
Another recent exploration of a splosionating is credited to [[Deidara]] ic equipment and resources (such as the computer and Uncyclopedia). It is NOT, and I mean, NOT to be confused with "GO BANG!!" which simply explodes in a non-ka-blooey but equally childish way. E.G.: "[[Oscar Wilde]] GO BANG!!" penis
+
|-
  +
! '''Spouse''' || [[P. J. Soles]] (1978-1983)<br>[[Meg Ryan]] (1991-2001)<br>Kimberly Buffington (2004-present)
  +
|}
   
Derivatives:
 
*A sploded -already gone ka-blooey
 
*A sploding -in the process of going ka-blooey
 
*A splosion -something that goes ka-blooey, esp. in a spontaneous and messy fashion
 
   
''Ex.: Little Jimmy was so excited, he a sploded all over himself.''="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
 
   
==How a splode works==
 
   
A sploding, not to be confused with ass-ploding (See [[Fart]]), is the procthose crumbs that are left at the end. Mmmm, crumbs...) This causes the Asps to [[physics|a selerate]] in every direction known to humans (and seven others known only to ostriches) in the search for Cheetos of the right size.
+
==History==
urred to someone who has a sploded.]]
+
===Sex===
  +
He always seems to get mostly cast-offs from the lead singer and lead guitar player. Sometimes a hot mom will do. Still, the drummer never got the high quality poon the guys on the front half of the stage got. It turns out the line "I'm the band's Drummer," doesn't work, often frightening women away or, in some cases, getting the drummer in question reported to the police.
   
However, due to the incredibly [[Wan der Waals force|strong attraction]] betwa fraction of a second as the Asps get bored due to their incredibly short attention span and forget why they weren't [[Will Smith|chillin]]' at their crib.
+
===Drugs===
  +
This is what all band members do when not having sex or rock'n rolling. Since he's getting less sex than anyone in the band but The Keyboard Player he's got more time for drugs.
   
==Spontaneous a splosions==
+
===Rock & Roll===
[[Image:Exploding-head.gif|thumb|left|SEHS: A sploding head]]
+
Drummers are most notable in Rock & Roll music, where they are allowed to play the loudest. In some bands, such as [[Led Zeppelin]], the drummer is the only audible part of the entire band, making the music extremely uninteresting. Drummers can be sorted into two categories: drummers with superhuman abilities (including the ability to play drum solos that can last anywhere from 2 minutes to infinity) and drummers with absolutely no talent whatsoever, who consider it an impressive feat to hold a steady beat for more than 4 minutes without screwing up once.
{{q|Yeah, that can happen.|[[Captain Denial]]|spontaneous a splosions}}
 
{{q|Spontaneous a splosions are spontaneous.| [[Captain Obvious]]|spontaneous a splosions}}
 
is still much to discover, several theoretical explanations have been created.
 
   
===Go ahead a splode===
+
==Bands==
  +
The Drummer has forgettably performed in a number of bands not limited to the following:
   
SASHS (''Sudden A Sploded Head Syndrome''), also known in the pseudo-scientific community as Hyper-Cerebral Electrosis, or HCE, is a condition believed to be caused by overloading the brain with the [[body]]'s own [[electricity]] through
+
*[[Spinal Tap]]
[[image:Asplosionwarn.gif|right|thumb|WARNING! A Splosion I
+
*[[Earth Wind and Fire]] (he was the Wind)
==The a splosion of 2091==
+
*[[U2]]
1.
+
*[[Prince]] and the Revolution
  +
*[[Aerosmith]]
  +
*[[The Beatles]]: (He was the first drummer, but they replaced him with Ringo Starr because Ringo's name wasn't as goofy)
  +
*[[Thievery Corporation:]] (got busted)
  +
*[[The Police]]: (community service)
  +
*[[Living Colour]]
  +
*[[Black Sabbath]]
  +
*[[Bob Dylan]]'s Big Brass Band: (This band broke up after 2 hours of pure wrong)
  +
*[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0303933/ Drum Line] (uncredited cameo)
  +
*[[Smashing Pumpkins]]
  +
*[[The Brian Setzer Band]]
   
===A splode you a go===
+
==Trivia==
+
Unknownst to most, The Drummer usually plays another instrument. Just not very well
Spontaneous a splosions that occur to humans and a few animals result in a [[Split infinitive|split]]-second severe mental insanity. When people are repeatedly stressed or their [[Anger_management|mood]] abruusing intestinal gases to ignite, watching [[YouTube|YouTube Poops]] regularly, or by looking directly at the operational end of [[GLaDOS| The Device]].
 
 
This [[impotence|disorder]] is the result of the genetic make
 
[edit] Spontaneous a splosions
 
 
There is no cure, but there are treatment [[Admin Smackdowns|op
 
[[Image:Hitlerwatermelon-asplode.gif|200px|thumb|Fruit a splosion can be attained by applying any Nazi to any fruit. The Nazi's psycho anti-Jews waves overpower the flavor of fruit and thus, an a splosion is attain
 
== A splosions in technology ==
 
You can make computers is a lie" (''If it's a lie, it must be true. But it can't be true, because it's a lie'' and then BOOM).
 
*Running two programs on a [[Mac]] at the same time.
 
*Putting the device underwater.
 
*Putting the device in exassination]] on the device.
 
*Typing "Google" into Go
 
*Searching [[Chuck Norris]ner of ways.
 
 
===Fruit
 
A splosions can occur in some fruits without any reason. Cases of a splode in fruits include [[Fruitopia]]a and the mysterious ''fruit-a-splode-in-your-face-when-you-eat-it'' affliction. In Fruitopia, fruits a splode into a delicious [[drink]]. Fruit-a-splode-in-your-face-when-you-eat-it usually occurs when someonew, when fruit is sitting down and gets bored it decides to prank call pizza hut and asks for a whopper, unfortunately there is no whopper so it starts to argue and asks for the manager, but the manager left early to go on a date with his new girlfriend, so the fruit has diarrhea because he's lactose intolethe famous instance of [[Adolf Hitler]] attempting to eat a sploding [[watermelon]] at a demonstration at Bergen-Belsen. Shortly thereafter, he turned to his unidentified [[female]] companion and roared "Damn, this is just like last night!"
 
 
A [[Sweden|fruitcock
 
 
===Terrorist a splo
 
The everyday terrorits not get you laid, go USA!
 
 
===Kidney a splosions===
 
Most commonly found in people who have been doing the Atkins diet for several years. The weakened kidneys reach a critical state where they a splode abruptly. It's not uncommon to hear a low-carber utter the words "my kidneys a splode!" Despite their a sploded kidneys, they [[zombie|do not die]] and continue ambling about as lively as ever, much to the frustration of medical experts.
 
by professional Chucktologists (see [[Chuck Norris]]), if Chuck Norris glares at you, your kidneys will start to melt. If he stares at your for five seconds, your kidneys a spda (because Canadians are only good for their bacon).
 
 
===Kitten a splosion===ate time to huff kittensate]] and a five fourths vote in the [[House]]. After the congressional requirements are satisfied the kitten's mother must approve the request and you must then give the mother five three packs of tennis balls, three gallons of milk, five hand caught dead mouses, 42 pounds of cheese,Five golden rings, Four calling birds, Three French hens, Two turtle doves, a partridge in a pear tree, three of your eye lashes from both eyes, and your first born ch
 
===Nuclear a splosion===
 
A nuclear a splosion is caused when your head a sp
 
 
==A splosion Reactor==
 
A new study has shown that scientist are now able toourse if you believe that you must be a [[Pedophile|Wikipedia]] admin or something, because A sploding is the best thing that can possibly happen. ]
 
[[Image:Card-Asplode.jpg|thumb|A splode in [[Christmas patra]]}}
 
 
{{Q|01011001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01101000 01100101 01100001 01100100 00100000 01000001 00100000 01010011 01010000 01001100 01001111 01000100 01000101. | [[Your computer]]|[[A splode]]}}
 
 
A splode is often used in the media as a mo
 
=== Use By Noobs ===
 
 
N00bs use the term a splode as a form of 133r!
 
 
N00b: Oh teh noes!!! I am asplode!!11!eleventyone!!
 
 
 
===A splode simulation===
 
It is possible to replic
 
 
A common example that is losion. Students simply fill the water balloon with water and the a sploding device is made. To [[The Really Big Button That Doesn't Do Anything|activ with a high speed camera.
 
 
===A splode: the command prompt===
 
[[Image:HumanEater.jpg|thumb|Result of being shot in the face
 
(PLEASE BEAR IN MIND THAT THESE ARE PRODUCED USING THE SIMPLEST A SPLODE MATRIX!)
 
Micro$oft secretly enabled a splode as a DOS command. Opening the command prompt and entering C:\asplode would start a countdown which would, when finished, cause your hard drive to a splode. Entering D:\asplodng B:\asplode. Usually this makes the 5.25" floppy drive a splode! If you enter this into a Linux shell, it a splodes all Window$ computers within a 5-mile radius and all Mac computers within a 2-feet radius. By entering Ω:/asplode, the [[internets]] will a splode. If you loved your PC, you would have e
 
(Note: drive letter may vary between PCs.)
 
 
====drive letter variation matric
 
When using these matrices, it is generally recommended to use a numberset with π symbols. Since this is not possible to most people in this dimension, please use the closest numbersymbo
 
 
the matrix that we start out with i
 
<math>I_3 = \begin{bmatrix}
 
1 & 0 & 0 \\
 
0 & 0 & 1 \end{bmatrix}</math>
 
 
this is relatively simple right? next w
 
a & 0 & 0 \\
 
0 & a & 0 \\
 
0 & 0 & a \end{bmatrix}</math>
 
 
this is when the trusty cat comes in witho do..
 
 
==Connection to Shooumb|left|An example of a Shoop-da-Woop-induced a splosion]]
 
The [[HowTo:Shoop Da Woop|Shoop da Woop]], along with several other comical offensive mechanisms, has been identified as the cause of numerous a splosions, both on the part of the shoop da woop-er, and the shoop da woop-ee. The lazah produced by a shoop da woop attack is often described as a combination of Chuck Norris ill render the resultant lazah's target helpless to a spontaneous and irreversible a splosion. However, when done incorrectly, a shoop da woop may not only a splode the shoop da woop-er, but every alpaca within a five mile radius of the initial a splosion, and you wouldn't want to do that to a
 
 
Shooping da Woop should be done
 
[[Image:Jbmtas-logo.jpg|right|theft|thumb|An advanced level 82 a splosion, previously mistakenly classified as a level 81.]]
 
*[[Exploding_Animal|A sploding animal with ''real'' explosions]]
 
*[[SEHS|A Sploding Head Syndrode]]
 
*[[Strong Bad|Strong Bad a splode as well]]
 
*[[SNL|MacGruber]]
 
*[[EXPLODE!!!]]
 
*[[Black Santa]]
 
*[[List of minor iProducts#iSp
 
*[[Aweplosion]]
 
*[[Spaghetti|A Sghettioner]]
 
[[Category:Chemistry]]
 
[[Category:Pokemon]]
 
[[Category:Nuclear Physics]]
 
lol
 

Latest revision as of 11:46, July 13, 2011

The Drummer is noted for being the un-notable part of many notable bands. Most of this is due to the fact he sits way back in the back of the stage where he is barely visible, and if he is seen, he is often mistaken for a piece of stage equipment such as a spare microphone or a cardboard box. When he's hanging around with the band, he is often mistaken for a roadie or a fan who's on drugs. When on the street people don't make eye contact with him and will sometimes say, "I don't have any change," without being asked.

He spends a lot of his time and professional career hanging out with The Keyboard Player.

The Drummer

No Photo Available|

Name THE The Drummer
Born June?/ whatever/ about 1950's I guess
Died There was the time his heart stopped, but they brought him back.
Occupation Hitting hollow, inanimate objects with sticks
Spouse P. J. Soles (1978-1983)
Meg Ryan (1991-2001)
Kimberly Buffington (2004-present)



edit History

edit Sex

He always seems to get mostly cast-offs from the lead singer and lead guitar player. Sometimes a hot mom will do. Still, the drummer never got the high quality poon the guys on the front half of the stage got. It turns out the line "I'm the band's Drummer," doesn't work, often frightening women away or, in some cases, getting the drummer in question reported to the police.

edit Drugs

This is what all band members do when not having sex or rock'n rolling. Since he's getting less sex than anyone in the band but The Keyboard Player he's got more time for drugs.

edit Rock & Roll

Drummers are most notable in Rock & Roll music, where they are allowed to play the loudest. In some bands, such as Led Zeppelin, the drummer is the only audible part of the entire band, making the music extremely uninteresting. Drummers can be sorted into two categories: drummers with superhuman abilities (including the ability to play drum solos that can last anywhere from 2 minutes to infinity) and drummers with absolutely no talent whatsoever, who consider it an impressive feat to hold a steady beat for more than 4 minutes without screwing up once.

edit Bands

The Drummer has forgettably performed in a number of bands not limited to the following:

edit Trivia

Unknownst to most, The Drummer usually plays another instrument. Just not very well

Personal tools
projects