Testicles

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Testicles,or the Punching Bag for Women. They can also be stress- relief balls, promote health and happiness, according to Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Testicles are therapeutic devices designed to alleviate emotional stress and anxiety through the application of kinesthetic exercise. They are also known as stress-relief balls.

[edit] Description

Two sqeezable, oval-shaped balls are packaged in close proximity to one another inside a sack, known as the scrotum. Testicles come in a variety of colored pouches, including tan, bronze, chocolate, coffee, brown, black, cornsilk, yellow, pink, red, and blue, but only when an admirer fails to relieve the testicles themselves.

[edit] Instructions for use

To alleviate stress and anxiety, the user manipulates the balls through the silky pouch, rolling them together or in opposite directions, kneading them lightly, or jiggling them. Manufacturers suggest that users resist the impulse to bounce the balls, because they are not made of rubber and could be damaged if too much force is applied to them.plus big tits on them.

[edit] Uses and benefits

Testicles are endorsed by many physicians, health organizations, and fitness centers as an ideal product for the release of stress, and users also express satisfaction with the item.

“They're great! I don't know how I ever got through the day without a pair of testicles to play with!”

~ Tom Cruise

“Rubbing my testicles makes me feel good all over.”

~ John Travolta

“Whenever I feel stressed out at work, I take a break, not for coffee, but for a testicles workout. Soon after, I feel like a million bucks.”

~ Oscar Wilde

“I wish I had a pair to squeeze.”

~ Sarah Michelle Gellar

Doctors also say that testicles are effective in the treatment of arthritis, nerve-related diseases, gout, and depression. "Manipulating a pair of testicles generally has a pleasant, even a potentially euphoric effect, which can result in tranquil, relaxed feelings," Dr. Laura Schlessinger declares. "I play with a pair of them every day, after I get home from the office."

Many users also report finding relief from pain as a result of flexing the testicles between their thumbs and fingers. "A five-finger massage is generally the best approach," Dr. Schlessinger advises.

[edit] Games to Play with Testicles

Here are some fun games to play with testicles!

Game 1

Step 1: Get 10+ guys and find a dark area

Step 2: Get naked and put fluorescent paint on testicles

Step 3: Run around this dark area trying to maim other guys testicles while safeguarding your own

Tip: Bring a weapon(see below for best choices) just in case things get a bit rough.

Game 2

Step 1: Get a bucket of cold water

Step 2: Find a very cold pole

Step 3: Saturate testicles in cold water

Step 4: Touch wet, cold, testicles against the very cold pole

Tip: Bring friends who like to abuse you for hours of fun!

Game 3

Step 1: Get a chick

Step 2: Fuck her

Step 3: Fuck her some more

Step 4: Jizz

Game 4

Step 1: put your testicles in meat sauce

Step 2: Now get your dog or cat and play keep away

Game 5

Step 1: Put your testicles in a blender

Step 2: Make a tasty milkshake

Step 3: Feed it to your best friends

Step 4: When they're in the hospital, laugh and tell them they ate testicles

Step 5: Hide in a sewer for 1 year before they rape you then kill you

Game 6

Step 1: Scratch your balls

Step 2: Feel the relief

Game 69

Step 1: Rent any Movie written by Jason Friedberg

Step 2: Buy alcohol

Step 3: Consume alcohol with friends/enemies/Sudanese government officials whenever a character gets hit in the testicular area

Step 4: Rinse testicles in luke warm water and repeat as necessary

Scissors Testicles Stone

Testicles lose to both Scissors & Stone. The rest you already know.

Weapons certified by Oscar Wilde for testicle protection and maiming:

• Knife
• Spork
• Scissors
• Chainsaw
• Washing Machine
• Truck