Template:UnNews Quick weather

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Worldwide Forecast at a Glance:

  • In Asia, the influenza cauldren of the world, expect a slight cleansing mist.


  • Tomorrow's weather will be sunny, with a 30% chance of cheerleaders holding a fund raiser!

  • On to Eurasia, there'll be some heavy thunder about as loud as a mountain goat fart.

  • And now, for your extended forecast: "Foooorrrcaaaasssstt".

  • In summary, cool showers, cold beer, and grilled bratwurst makes Jack a happy happy man.

Special Weather Report:

An acid-tripping meteorologist prepared today's Local UnWeather forecast.

Global Warming Indicator

The odds of this forecast actually occurring is equal to the odds of an astronaut suriviving a mission to Mars while being duct taped to a rhino.

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