Template:UnNews Quick weather

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Worldwide Forecast at a Glance:

  • Things should improve in Africa and the Americas, but there'll be loud thunderstorms in the evening, about the volume of a Thin Lizzy concert.


  • Starting in Scotland, expect golf ball size hail at tee-off.

  • Forecast alert: Expect 30 to 40 tornadoes to pummel dowtown LA and Hollywood with dropping box office receipts.

  • In Nebraska, far from the moist tongue, suction vortices may disipate due to a choking downdraft.

  • In summary, light breezes everywhere.

Special Weather Report:

Montreal: Someone left Niagara Falls running all night and accidently drained the Great Lakes.

Global Warming Indicator

If you were to find the population of penguins and divide that by the ratio of butterflies to macacs, you would get a number no where near the accuracy of this forecast.

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