Template:Lead articles

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REMEMBER: PLEASE USE THE "arrange" PARAMETER PROPERLY! EXAMPLES:
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This is {Lead articles}, the template for all five articles on the UnNews Front Page.
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It calls {Lead article}, which renders each of the five articles. Click Preview and
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detailed instructions will appear.
   
| arrange = lead (for the lead story)
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1-SPOT-->{{Lead article
| arrange = left (to place a story on the left)
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|arrange = lead
| arrange = right (to place a story on the right)
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|dept = PANIC in the SKIES
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|image = Coney-Island-Cyclone-Coaster.jpg
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|title = Roller coaster stalls, terrified riders invited back for more
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<!-- |short_title = -->
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|summary = '''[[New York City|NEW YORK]], [[New York (state)|New York]]''' -- [[Coney Island]] visitors riding the ''Cyclone'' roller coaster caused a thrilling stall on a downhill section of track.
   
ALSO: IF YOU USE NEWLINES BETWEEN TEMPLATE CALLS, COMMENT THEM OUT, OR YOU WILL GET <P></P>s (NEW PARAGRAPHS) IN BETWEEN YOUR NEWS STORIES, WHICH MAY THROW OFF THE SPACING.
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Spokeswoman Luna Park stated that it was an "isolated mechanical issue". Although past events usually are good predictors of future events, Ms. Park's assertion seems to mean that this event will predict a lot of the exact opposite.
   
IMPORTANT NOTE: When not using a parameter, please put it between comment tags to prevent it from interfering with the template. When you want to use a previously unused parameter, simply remove the comment tags from around it. If the parameter isn't there yet, just add it.
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
   
Types:
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2-SPOT-->{{Lead article
breaking - for especially timely or time-critical stories
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|arrange = left
special
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|dept = none
original - for stories with {{Tl|Original}} instead of real sources
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|image = Tsipras.jpg
exclusive - for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive
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|title = Crash of Germanwings plane is a mystery#More sources
because we're interviewing ourselves
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|short_title = Germanwings co-pilot had a doctor's note
urgent
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|summary = '''MONTABAUR, [[Germany]]''' -- Investigators have found, in the apartment of Germanwings co-pilot Andreas Lubitz, a torn-up notice from his [[doctor]] excusing him from [[work]] on the fateful day.
editorial - for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
 
column - for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
 
feature - for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
 
   
Add an image_width parameter to change the image width.
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The note stresses the negative health effects of flying a jetliner into the ground. An investigator stressed that pilots who intend to crash airplanes should always notify Personnel of their plan, preferably beforehand, to get "buy-in" from other stakeholders.
   
Blank template:
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}}<!--
{{Lead articles 2/a
 
|arrange = ( lead | left | right )
 
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3-SPOT-->{{Lead article
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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|arrange = right
|arrange = lead
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|dept = none
|image = Oscar-dress2.jpg
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|image = Kerryborg.jpg
<!-- |type = -->
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|title = Iran deal done, except for details
|title = Iranian news adds burqa to Michelle Obama's_Oscars_dress
 
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary ='''[[Hollywood|HOLLYWOOD]]''' -- In the U.S., Michelle Obama’s wardrobe isn’t exactly considered racist or sexist or even nice. But apparently her gown for the Oscars, with its crotch design, was too bigoted for viewers in [[Iran]]. Fars News, a network in Iran, edited the First Lady’s dress in a story about her Academy Awards exploitation appearance posted on their website. In the photo, her ugly gray dress appears completely covered by an appealing blue Muslim burqa - as if she had enough grace to wear such feminine apparel.
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|summary = '''[[Los Angeles|LAUSANNE]], [[Switzerland]]''' -- {{InlineMedia|Iran deal done, except for details}} The [[United States]] beat a self-imposed deadline, announcing a nuclear weapons deal with [[Iran]] with nothing left to be worked out except all the details.
   
In the article, Fars News states that Obama handed out the best picture award to ''“the anti-Iranian film ‘Embargo.’”'' Iranian officials have repeatedly criticized the Ben Affleck film, which is quite unusual considering that the movie has not been screened in any Iranian theaters nor even seen by any Iranian officials.
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The deadline was vital to keep the [[Barack Obama|Obama administration]] from having to announce a treaty to pacify Iran on [[April Fool's Day]].
}}<!--
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
   
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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4-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = left
 
|arrange = left
|image = Kateduchess01.jpg
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|dept = none
<!-- |type = -->
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|image = Ketchup1.jpg
|title = I am a real woman says Princess Kate
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|title = Kraft and Heinz to stir a Big Soup
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary ='''[[London|LONDON]], [[United Kingdom]]''' --
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|summary = '''[[Philadelphia|BUFFETT'S WARREN]], [[Pennsylvania]]''' -- Corner shops, chocoholics and [[Cafe|greasy spoons]] throughout the world are in a ''Twirl'' over ''Wispas'' of the imminent merger between [[Kraft]] and [[Ketchup v. Catsup|H.J. Heinz]].
   
Beautiful, stunning, fantastic [[Kate Middleton|Princess Kate]] has been driven to [[wikipedia:Tiny Tears|Tiny Tears]] by the cruel taunts of the [[wikipedia:Cabbage Patch Doll|Boiled Cabbage Patch Doll]] that she is a lump of cheap plastic with no personality.
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The ''Fresh Take'' on the ''Fusion'' of the two corporate food ''Heroes'' occurred when [[Stockbroker|venture capitalists]] concluded that [[American]]s would jump at the chance to add ketchup to their [[cheese]] [[Hot Dog|dogs]] without an intervening step.
   
Speaking at [[wikipedia:Hamley's|Hamley's]] ,Kate bravely laid into the '[[wikipedia:Hilary Mantel|ugly old hag Hilary]]' for saying she was only created to be a breeding machine for the British Royal Family Toy Range and said her opponent was 'way past her sell by date'.
 
 
}}<!--
 
}}<!--
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
|arrange = right
 
|image = Chariot_race.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
|title = Ikea corraled into horse-meat scandal
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
|summary ='''STOCKHOLM, [[Sweden]]''' -- Swedish furniture giant [[Ikea]] became entangled in Europe's widening [[horse]]-meat scandal Monday, as regulators suspected the chain's [[meat]]balls of containing the mystery meat.
 
   
Testers in the [[Czech Republic]] found unspecified trace amounts of horse DNA in packages of meatballs that were supposed to contain only [[cow]] and [[pig]] [[DNA]]. Meatballs from the same batch were sent to 12 other European countries, resulting in a [[Europe|continent-wide]] food scare.
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5-SPOT-->{{Lead article
}}<!--
 
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
|arrange = left
 
|image = Oprah-Exorcist.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
|title = Vatican joins banned prayer lawsuit against Armstrong
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
|summary = ''''''[[Vatican|VATICAN]]''' -- The Vatican said Friday it has joined a confessional lawsuit against cyclist Lance Armstrong that was originally filed by some jilted fan boy in Idaho. Armstrong, the one time mythical and now legendary cyclist, has admitted to using performance-enhancing Protestant prayers banned by the Vatican. He was team rider when the Catholic Church sponsored him from 1996 to 2004 and Armstrong won seven of his six Tour de France titles, the Vatican said.
 
 
The civil lawsuit alleges that Armstrong submitted false confessions every Saturday for many years so that the church would sponsor him, even though he was ''“regularly employing banned prayers and pagan rituals to enhance his performance in violation of the papal sponsorship agreement,”''
 
}}<!--
 
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = right
 
|arrange = right
|image = Police-and-crowd.jpg
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|dept = none
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|image = StrictlyCameron.jpg
|title = Police dog takes over the Oscar Pistorius investigation
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|title = Cameron proposes a seven-day NHS
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
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|summary = '''[[Johannesburg|JOHANNESBURG]], [[South Africa]]''' --
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|summary = '''[[Manchester|MANCHESTER]], [[UK]]''' -- [[Conservative Party|Conservative]] leader [[David Cameron]] plans to introduce a seven-day week to the [[National Health Service]], as the NHS's current Pagan Druid calendar has long been out of use across the rest of the country.
 
The South African Police Authority have confirmed they have appointed one of their best dogs to take over the mismanaged investigation following the arrest of Oscar Pistorius for the murder of his girlfriend.
 
   
'''Rex''', a pure bred Afrikaans dog with a long history in (black) crowd control replaces Detective Hilton Botha who has been removed from the case as it turned out his skills were more of the school of Frank Drebin than [[Sherlock Holmes]]
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Conservatives also aim to replace all medicine with [[paracetamol]], force ambulance staff to use buses instead of petrol-guzzling ambulances, and cut 100% of the pay to NHS staff, freeing up enough money to bribe the courts in Prince Andrew's sex trial.
   
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}}<noinclude>{{-}}
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{{Lead article doc}}</noinclude>

Latest revision as of 02:50, April 1, 2015

Coney-Island-Cyclone-Coaster
UnNews Logo Potato1PANIC in the SKIES
NEW YORK, New York -- Coney Island visitors riding the Cyclone roller coaster caused a thrilling stall on a downhill section of track.

Spokeswoman Luna Park stated that it was an "isolated mechanical issue". Although past events usually are good predictors of future events, Ms. Park's assertion seems to mean that this event will predict a lot of the exact opposite. Full story»


Tsipras
MONTABAUR, Germany -- Investigators have found, in the apartment of Germanwings co-pilot Andreas Lubitz, a torn-up notice from his doctor excusing him from work on the fateful day.

The note stresses the negative health effects of flying a jetliner into the ground. An investigator stressed that pilots who intend to crash airplanes should always notify Personnel of their plan, preferably beforehand, to get "buy-in" from other stakeholders. Full story»

Kerryborg
LAUSANNE, Switzerland -- (Gnome-speakernotes listen) The United States beat a self-imposed deadline, announcing a nuclear weapons deal with Iran with nothing left to be worked out except all the details.

The deadline was vital to keep the Obama administration from having to announce a treaty to pacify Iran on April Fool's Day. Full story»


Ketchup1
BUFFETT'S WARREN, Pennsylvania -- Corner shops, chocoholics and greasy spoons throughout the world are in a Twirl over Wispas of the imminent merger between Kraft and H.J. Heinz.

The Fresh Take on the Fusion of the two corporate food Heroes occurred when venture capitalists concluded that Americans would jump at the chance to add ketchup to their cheese dogs without an intervening step. Full story»

StrictlyCameron
MANCHESTER, UK -- Conservative leader David Cameron plans to introduce a seven-day week to the National Health Service, as the NHS's current Pagan Druid calendar has long been out of use across the rest of the country.

Conservatives also aim to replace all medicine with paracetamol, force ambulance staff to use buses instead of petrol-guzzling ambulances, and cut 100% of the pay to NHS staff, freeing up enough money to bribe the courts in Prince Andrew's sex trial. Full story»



Instructions for {{Lead articles}} (Edit them) (Return to the Front Page):

  • arrangePlease use this properly!--Indicates the article's layout on the Front Page:
    • lead One-across (the article in the "1-spot")
    • left Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the left side
    • right Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the right side
  • image — The image name (omit File:). There should always be an image, but if you leave this blank, the null image Spacer.gif will be used
  • dept — An optional "department" legend that will appear centered above the headline. Use them only in the 1-Spot; in the side-by-side leads (2- through 5-Spots), these graphics mess up rendering on smaller screens. Lowercase letters will become small capitals, but they won't look very good. Typical "departments" are:
    • BREAKING NEWS or URGENT for stories that either are relevant to big real-world news, or are not
    • EXCLUSIVE for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive because we're interviewing ourselves
    • PANIC in the SKIES — prized by all journalists, especially if it should have been the Happiest Day of the Year
    • NAVEL-GAZING for UnNews articles that revolve around UnNews
    • FEATURE for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
    • ORIGINAL for stories with {{Original}} instead of real sources
    • EDITORIAL for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
    • COLUMN for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
  • title — The page name (omit UnNews:); that is, the headline
  • short_titleOptional — If the page name is too long or doesn't look like a headline, provide the desired headline here.
  • summary — The first sentence or two of the story. If you can write a funnier lead by pulling stuff from throughout the story, that would be funnier.

Important notes:

  • If you put vertical space between the calls to {{Lead article}}, comment them out, or space will be output that will throw off the relation between articles.
  • If not using dept, set it to none. If not using short_title, turn the whole line into a comment: <!-- short_title= -->. To put it back into service, just remove the special characters. Don't remove the lines completely; that makes it harder for the next editor to see the correct form to follow.
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