Template:Lead articles

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REMEMBER: PLEASE USE THE "arrange" PARAMETER PROPERLY! EXAMPLES:
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This is {Lead articles}, the template for all five articles on the UnNews Front Page.
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It calls {Lead article}, which renders each of the five articles, as follows:
   
| arrange = lead (for the lead story)
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{{Lead article
| arrange = left (to place a story on the left)
 
| arrange = right (to place a story on the right)
 
 
ALSO: IF YOU USE NEWLINES BETWEEN TEMPLATE CALLS, COMMENT THEM OUT, OR YOU WILL GET <P></P>s (NEW PARAGRAPHS) IN BETWEEN YOUR NEWS STORIES, WHICH MAY THROW OFF THE SPACING.
 
 
IMPORTANT NOTE: When not using a parameter, please put it between comment tags to prevent it from interfering with the template. When you want to use a previously unused parameter, simply remove the comment tags from around it. If the parameter isn't there yet, just add it.
 
 
Types:
 
breaking - for especially timely or time-critical stories
 
special
 
original - for stories with {{Tl|Original}} instead of real sources
 
exclusive - for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive
 
because we're interviewing ourselves
 
urgent
 
editorial - for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
 
column - for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
 
feature - for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
 
 
Add an image_width parameter to change the image width.
 
 
Blank template:
 
{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = ( lead | left | right )
 
|arrange = ( lead | left | right )
 
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1-SPOT-->{{Lead article
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|arrange = lead
 
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|image = Oscar-dress2.jpg
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|image = Downtown cold.jpg
 
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<!-- |type = -->
|title = Iranian news adds burqa to Michelle Obama's_Oscars_dress
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|title = Canadians speechless as November is the new winter
 
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|summary ='''[[Hollywood|HOLLYWOOD]]''' -- In the U.S., Michelle Obama’s wardrobe isn’t exactly considered racist or sexist or even nice. But apparently her gown for the Oscars, with its crotch design, was too bigoted for viewers in [[Iran]]. Fars News, a network in Iran, edited the First Lady’s dress in a story about her Academy Awards exploitation appearance posted on their website. In the photo, her ugly gray dress appears completely covered by an appealing blue Muslim burqa - as if she had enough grace to wear such feminine apparel.
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|summary = '''OTTAWA, [[Ontario]]''' -- A cold wave of unprecedented proportions has hit the [[Canada|Land of the Flying Moose]].
   
In the article, Fars News states that Obama handed out the best picture award to ''“the anti-Iranian film ‘Embargo.’”'' Iranian officials have repeatedly criticized the Ben Affleck film, which is quite unusual considering that the movie has not been screened in any Iranian theaters nor even seen by any Iranian officials.
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The news, which literally hit reporters in the face as soon as they left their houses, reached the front page of various newspapers outlets. "[[Global warming]] must be a [[Lord Christopher Monckton denial|hoax]]!" titled the ''Globe and Mail.'' As the more simplistic ''Toronto Sun'' put it, "Global warming trolololol!" Across the border, six feet of global warming fell on [[Buffalo]], [[New York]].
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-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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2-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = left
 
|arrange = left
|image = Kateduchess01.jpg
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|image = New_barack_obama_Bunny_copy.jpg
 
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|title = I am a real woman says Princess Kate
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|title = Obama to everyone: Drop dead!
 
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|summary ='''[[London|LONDON]], [[United Kingdom]]''' --
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|summary = '''[[Washington, D.C.|WASHINGTON, D.C.]]''' -- [[Barack Obama|Obama]] reacted to his party's landslide election loss by using a power that last year he insisted he did not have, favoring [[illegal]]s who have remained in the [[U.S.]] without credentials for the five years that he has remained in the [[White House]] without [[Barack Obama's birth|credentials]].
   
Beautiful, stunning, fantastic [[Kate Middleton|Princess Kate]] has been driven to [[wikipedia:Tiny Tears|Tiny Tears]] by the cruel taunts of the [[wikipedia:Cabbage Patch Doll|Boiled Cabbage Patch Doll]] that she is a lump of cheap plastic with no personality.
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Shocked [[Republicans]] huddled in a [[Senate]] cloakroom to devise a more clever gimmick, though avoiding talk of [[impeachment]], impounding funds, or frowning. Several cautioned that saying "No" to Obama might make the [[left wing]] call them the "party of No" again and cost them another election, like the one they just swept.
   
Speaking at [[wikipedia:Hamley's|Hamley's]] ,Kate bravely laid into the '[[wikipedia:Hilary Mantel|ugly old hag Hilary]]' for saying she was only created to be a breeding machine for the British Royal Family Toy Range and said her opponent was 'way past her sell by date'.
 
 
}}<!--
 
}}<!--
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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3-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = right
 
|arrange = right
|image = Chariot_race.jpg
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|image = 1428239_aftermath300.jpg
 
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|title = Ikea corraled into horse-meat scandal
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|title = Premium seating offered for Ferguson riots
 
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|summary ='''STOCKHOLM, [[Sweden]]''' -- Swedish furniture giant [[Ikea]] became entangled in Europe's widening [[horse]]-meat scandal Monday, as regulators suspected the chain's [[meat]]balls of containing the mystery meat.
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|summary = '''FERGUSON, [[Missouri]]''' -- Organizers have opened bidding on premium seating for [[riot]]s that could occur as soon as a grand jury classifies a shocking white-on-black murder as self-defense. They insist the victim was unarmed, as his attempt to wrestle the officer's gun away had not yet succeeded.
   
Testers in the [[Czech Republic]] found unspecified trace amounts of horse DNA in packages of meatballs that were supposed to contain only [[cow]] and [[pig]] [[DNA]]. Meatballs from the same batch were sent to 12 other European countries, resulting in a [[Europe|continent-wide]] food scare.
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A coalition asked for 36 hours' notice before the decision, and demanded that police not use "menacing" equipment like bulletproof vests, which would deny rioters a non-threatening [[work]] environment.
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-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
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4-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = left
 
|arrange = left
|image = Oprah-Exorcist.jpg
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|image = Obama in monkey suit.jpg
 
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|title = Vatican joins banned prayer lawsuit against Armstrong
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|title = Obama lands on comet, taken prisoner by pod people
 
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|summary = ''''''[[Vatican|VATICAN]]''' -- The Vatican said Friday it has joined a confessional lawsuit against cyclist Lance Armstrong that was originally filed by some jilted fan boy in Idaho. Armstrong, the one time mythical and now legendary cyclist, has admitted to using performance-enhancing Protestant prayers banned by the Vatican. He was team rider when the Catholic Church sponsored him from 1996 to 2004 and Armstrong won seven of his six Tour de France titles, the Vatican said.
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|summary = '''DEEP SPACE XI, [[Milky Way]]''' -- [[U.S. President]] [[Barack Obama]], responding to losing to a [[Political Parties|party]] with nothing to say beyond, "We're not Obama," took his new '''Relevance Initiative''' to a comet.
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Mr. Obama negotiated a [[global warming]] treaty with pod person Xinping XI. But XI then arrested Obama, paraded him in front of other pod people in a prisoner suit, and patted him on the head.
   
The civil lawsuit alleges that Armstrong submitted false confessions every Saturday for many years so that the church would sponsor him, even though he was ''“regularly employing banned prayers and pagan rituals to enhance his performance in violation of the papal sponsorship agreement,”''
 
 
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-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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5-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = right
 
|arrange = right
|image = Police-and-crowd.jpg
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|image = Philea.jpg
 
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|title = Police dog takes over the Oscar Pistorius investigation
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|title = Comet welcomes visitors
 
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|summary = '''[[Johannesburg|JOHANNESBURG]], [[South Africa]]''' --
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|summary = '''[[Moon|KLANGER TOWN]], [[USA|Centre of the Known Universe]]''' -- It was a big big day at [[wikipedia:Clangers|Klanger Town]], as we welcomed our first alien to land here since [[David Bowie|Major Tom]] floated by some years back.
   
The South African Police Authority have confirmed they have appointed one of their best dogs to take over the mismanaged investigation following the arrest of Oscar Pistorius for the murder of his girlfriend.
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"I hope we can soon make contact with our visitors," said leading Klanger, Major Kilgore Klanger. But not all Klangers have shown to be happy with the arrival. The Ku Kluck Klangers have already put on their white tinfoil.
   
'''Rex''', a pure bred Afrikaans dog with a long history in (black) crowd control replaces Detective Hilton Botha who has been removed from the case as it turned out his skills were more of the school of Frank Drebin than [[Sherlock Holmes]]
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}}<noinclude>{{-}}
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{{Lead article doc}}</noinclude>
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Latest revision as of 14:19, November 22, 2014

Downtown cold
OTTAWA, Ontario -- A cold wave of unprecedented proportions has hit the Land of the Flying Moose.

The news, which literally hit reporters in the face as soon as they left their houses, reached the front page of various newspapers outlets. "Global warming must be a hoax!" titled the Globe and Mail. As the more simplistic Toronto Sun put it, "Global warming trolololol!" Across the border, six feet of global warming fell on Buffalo, New York. Full story»


New barack obama Bunny copy
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Obama reacted to his party's landslide election loss by using a power that last year he insisted he did not have, favoring illegals who have remained in the U.S. without credentials for the five years that he has remained in the White House without credentials.

Shocked Republicans huddled in a Senate cloakroom to devise a more clever gimmick, though avoiding talk of impeachment, impounding funds, or frowning. Several cautioned that saying "No" to Obama might make the left wing call them the "party of No" again and cost them another election, like the one they just swept. Full story»

1428239 aftermath300
FERGUSON, Missouri -- Organizers have opened bidding on premium seating for riots that could occur as soon as a grand jury classifies a shocking white-on-black murder as self-defense. They insist the victim was unarmed, as his attempt to wrestle the officer's gun away had not yet succeeded.

A coalition asked for 36 hours' notice before the decision, and demanded that police not use "menacing" equipment like bulletproof vests, which would deny rioters a non-threatening work environment. Full story»


Obama in monkey suit
DEEP SPACE XI, Milky Way -- U.S. President Barack Obama, responding to losing to a party with nothing to say beyond, "We're not Obama," took his new Relevance Initiative to a comet.

Mr. Obama negotiated a global warming treaty with pod person Xinping XI. But XI then arrested Obama, paraded him in front of other pod people in a prisoner suit, and patted him on the head. Full story»

Philea
KLANGER TOWN, Centre of the Known Universe -- It was a big big day at Klanger Town, as we welcomed our first alien to land here since Major Tom floated by some years back.

"I hope we can soon make contact with our visitors," said leading Klanger, Major Kilgore Klanger. But not all Klangers have shown to be happy with the arrival. The Ku Kluck Klangers have already put on their white tinfoil. Full story»



Instructions for {{Lead articles}} (Edit them) (Return to the Front Page):

  • arrangePlease use this properly!--Indicates the article's layout on the Front Page:
    • lead One-across (the article in the "1-spot")
    • left Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the left side
    • right Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the right side
  • image — The image name (omit File:). There should always be an image, but if you leave this blank, the null image Spacer.gif will be used
UnNewsEXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

Use of "type=" produces graphics like this. Use them only in the 1-Spot. In the side-by-side leads (2- through 5-Spots), these graphics mess up rendering on smaller screens.

  • type
    • Normally none; otherwise, one of the following:
    • breaking for especially timely or time-critical stories
    • special
    • original for stories with {{Original}} instead of real sources
    • exclusive for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive because we're interviewing ourselves
    • navel-gazing for UnNews articles that revolve around UnNews
    • urgent
    • panic for "PANIC in the SKIES"
    • editorial for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
    • column for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
    • feature for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
  • title — The page name (omit UnNews:); that is, the headline
  • short_titleOptional--If the page name is too long or doesn't look like a headline, provide the desired headline here.
  • summary — The first sentence or two of the story. If you can write a funnier lead by pulling stuff from throughout the story, that would be funnier.

Important notes:

  • If you put vertical space between the calls to {{Lead article}}, comment them out, or space will be output that will throw off the relation between articles.
  • If not using type, set it to none. Just blanking it doesn't work. If not using short_title, turn the whole line into a comment: <!== short_title= -->. To put it back into service, just remove the special characters. Don't remove the lines completely; that makes it harder for the next editor to see the correct form to follow.
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