Template:Lead articles

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REMEMBER: PLEASE USE THE "arrange" PARAMETER PROPERLY! EXAMPLES:
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This is {Lead articles}, the template for all five articles on the UnNews Front Page.
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It calls {Lead article}, which renders each of the five articles, as follows:
   
| arrange = lead (for the lead story)
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{{Lead article
| arrange = left (to place a story on the left)
 
| arrange = right (to place a story on the right)
 
 
ALSO: IF YOU USE NEWLINES BETWEEN TEMPLATE CALLS, COMMENT THEM OUT, OR YOU WILL GET <P></P>s (NEW PARAGRAPHS) IN BETWEEN YOUR NEWS STORIES, WHICH MAY THROW OFF THE SPACING.
 
 
IMPORTANT NOTE: When not using a parameter, please put it between comment tags to prevent it from interfering with the template. When you want to use a previously unused parameter, simply remove the comment tags from around it. If the parameter isn't there yet, just add it.
 
 
Types:
 
breaking - for especially timely or time-critical stories
 
special
 
original - for stories with {{Tl|Original}} instead of real sources
 
exclusive - for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive
 
because we're interviewing ourselves
 
urgent
 
editorial - for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
 
column - for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
 
feature - for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
 
 
Add an image_width parameter to change the image width.
 
 
Blank template:
 
{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = ( lead | left | right )
 
|arrange = ( lead | left | right )
 
|image_ =
 
|image_ =
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1-SPOT-->{{Lead article
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = lead
 
|arrange = lead
|image = Pantohorse01.jpg
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|image = Ron paul jalopy.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
<!-- |type = -->
|title = Pantomime horses are 'really humans' scandal
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|title = Ron Paul: My son, the warmonger
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary ='''[[London|LONDON]], [[United Kingdom]]''' --
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|summary = :'''By Dr. [[Ron Paul]]'''<br>For the eternity that I spent in Congress, I never once voted for an unbalanced budget, earmark, or foreign war. I am disappointed with my son, [[Ayn Rand|Rand]], who seems to be a mainstream [[GOP]] hawk with his call for [[war]] against this whole [[ISIS]] group.
   
Small children and parents are angry with the government that much loved pantomime horses are really 100% human.
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I raised Rand to be a principled me, so when I eventually kick the bucket, I will still be in [[Congress]]. Rand, come back home.
   
In DNA tests conducted by vets after a free [[Guinness]] tasting contest, 20 pantomime horses were examined and to be revealed to be two people in fake horse fur costumes. This was '100% proof' and yes, pour me another'.
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
   
Shocked entertainment agents and talent agencies had long accepted pantomime horses to be genuine. Now it seems that for years the entire industry had been working in [[Fish_pun#Alternatives_to_the_fish_pun|blinkers]] and hadn't carried out their own tests to determine whether a pantomime horse was a genuine equine or was in-fact a machine stitched costume containing two bald middle aged blokes. Possibly from [[Newcastle]].
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2-SPOT-->{{Lead article
}}<!--
 
 
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = left
 
|arrange = left
|image = silvio sylvia.jpg
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|image = SputnikVacuumCleanerSattelite.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
<!-- |type = -->
|title = Silvio moves on
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|title = Russia launches satellite that might not be a weapon
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary = '''ROME, Italy'''
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|summary = '''BAIKONUR, [[Kazahstan]]''' -- A mysterious [[Russian]] object launched earlier this year has been performing surprisingly [[stupid|harmless]] maneuvers, prompting some to start panicking that it could be some kind of secret peaceful spacecraft.
Media mogul, presidential hopeful and connoisseur of cuddly companions Silvio Berlusconi has regretfully had to let one of his latest acquisitions go. Silvio and the generously endowed Silvia Mammaroni looked like an item for at least a week or so, but despite intimate pizza meetings and facing the incandescent papparazzi, poor Silvia is no longer at his side.
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A specialist said, "This could also be the first happy case of a satellite defecting from Russia and refusing to perform the evil it was designed to carry out.”
   
''"It was the age problem"'', said the sober Silvio at a press conference, ''"she was getting on a bit, almost thirty you know, and I always said you can't trust a woman over thirty"''.
 
 
}}<!--
 
}}<!--
   
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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3-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = right
 
|arrange = right
|image = Nunwendy01.jpg
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|image = 1428239_aftermath300.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
<!-- |type = -->
|title = Race for Pope brings forth some unusual candidates
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|title = Premium seating offered for Ferguson riots
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary = '''[[Rome|ROME]], [[Italy]]''' --
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|summary = '''FERGUSON, [[Missouri]]''' -- Organizers have opened bidding on premium seating for [[riot]]s that could occur as soon as a grand jury classifies a shocking white-on-black murder as self-defense. They insist the victim was unarmed, as his attempt to wrestle the officer's gun away had not yet succeeded.
   
The race to become the next [[Catholic]] [[Pope]] has got a lot of <s>gamblers</s> people eager to influence the choice of who replaces [[Pope Benedict XVI]] when he steps down. The contest is said to be 'wide open' with a number of possible contenders.
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A coalition asked for 36 hours' notice before the decision, and demanded that police not use "menacing" equipment like bulletproof vests, which would deny rioters a non-threatening [[work]] environment.
   
The election which is due in March 2013 is already promising to be the 'dirtiest election' since 1492. This was when Pope [[wikipedia:Pope Alexander VI|Pope Alexander VI]] 'the Borgia Pope' poisoned his rivals to slide his fat Spanish arse onto St.Peter's Chair. So far these are the known candidates, with the former US Defense Secretary [[Donald Rumsfeld]] heading another list on the ''Unknown knowns''.
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
   
}}<!--
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4-SPOT-->{{Lead article
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = left
 
|arrange = left
|image = Chelsea1.jpg
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|image = Pen-on-lawn1.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
<!-- |type = -->
|title = President Chelsea Clinton jubilant as Bashar al-Assad dies of old age
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|title = All clear after suspicious ink pen disposed
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary = '''[[Washington DC |WASHINGTON DC]]''' -- Yesterday afternoon a cloud of radical Islamic gloom hung over secular Damascus as news spread that [[Syria]]’s long entrenched leader, Bashar al-Assad (82), had finally died of old age. Meanwhile, in Washington news of al-Assad’s timely passing was greeted with joy by President Chelsea Clinton (67) and her team of inbred [[Disney|Plutoc]][[rats]].
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|summary = '''NORTHEAST MIAMI-DADE, [[Florida]]''' -- Police have given the all-clear after investigating reports of a suspicious ballpoint pen found near Highland Oaks Middle School.
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DHS agents had already evacuated the entire state, but have now lowered the terror threat level from red to pink.
   
President Clinton said the death of Al-Assad marked a well-orchestrated “strategic victory” for Wall Street and a breath of musty air for western meddling in Middle Eastern tribal affairs.
 
 
}}<!--
 
}}<!--
-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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5-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = right
 
|arrange = right
|image = LordJimbo.jpg
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|image = Downtown cold.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
<!-- |type = -->
|title = Wikia to offer "gold membership" for wikis
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|title = Canadians speechless as November is the new winter
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
 
<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary = '''EVIL WIKIA&trade; HEADQUARTERS, San Francisco, [[California]]''' -- In order to address the flight from Wikia&trade; over issues of advertisements, Wikia&trade; has recently announced an ad-free option. Under the new gold-membership option, a wiki can become ad free in exchange for donations to cover the cost of web hosting.
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|summary = '''OTTAWA, [[Ontario]]''' -- A cold wave of unprecedented proportions has hit the [[Canada|Land of the Flying Moose]].
   
"We have had many wikis leave over the issue of advertisements," said [[Jimbo Wales]], CEO and evil overlord of [[Wikia]]&trade;. "By self-hosting, wikis can avoid any unwanted advertisements.
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The news, which literally hit reporters in the face as soon as they left their houses, reached the front page of various newspapers outlets. "[[Global warming]] must be a [[Lord Christopher Monckton denial|hoax]]!" titled the ''Globe and Mail.'' As the more simplistic ''Toronto Sun'' put it, "Global warming trolololol!" Across the border, six feet of global warming fell on [[Buffalo]], [[New York]].
   
}}
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}}<noinclude>{{-}}
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{{Lead article doc}}</noinclude>

Latest revision as of 20:29, November 26, 2014

Ron paul jalopy
 :By Dr. Ron Paul
For the eternity that I spent in Congress, I never once voted for an unbalanced budget, earmark, or foreign war. I am disappointed with my son, Rand, who seems to be a mainstream GOP hawk with his call for war against this whole ISIS group.

I raised Rand to be a principled me, so when I eventually kick the bucket, I will still be in Congress. Rand, come back home. Full story»


SputnikVacuumCleanerSattelite
BAIKONUR, Kazahstan -- A mysterious Russian object launched earlier this year has been performing surprisingly harmless maneuvers, prompting some to start panicking that it could be some kind of secret peaceful spacecraft.

A specialist said, "This could also be the first happy case of a satellite defecting from Russia and refusing to perform the evil it was designed to carry out.” Full story»

1428239 aftermath300
FERGUSON, Missouri -- Organizers have opened bidding on premium seating for riots that could occur as soon as a grand jury classifies a shocking white-on-black murder as self-defense. They insist the victim was unarmed, as his attempt to wrestle the officer's gun away had not yet succeeded.

A coalition asked for 36 hours' notice before the decision, and demanded that police not use "menacing" equipment like bulletproof vests, which would deny rioters a non-threatening work environment. Full story»


Pen-on-lawn1
NORTHEAST MIAMI-DADE, Florida -- Police have given the all-clear after investigating reports of a suspicious ballpoint pen found near Highland Oaks Middle School.

DHS agents had already evacuated the entire state, but have now lowered the terror threat level from red to pink. Full story»

Downtown cold
OTTAWA, Ontario -- A cold wave of unprecedented proportions has hit the Land of the Flying Moose.

The news, which literally hit reporters in the face as soon as they left their houses, reached the front page of various newspapers outlets. "Global warming must be a hoax!" titled the Globe and Mail. As the more simplistic Toronto Sun put it, "Global warming trolololol!" Across the border, six feet of global warming fell on Buffalo, New York. Full story»



Instructions for {{Lead articles}} (Edit them) (Return to the Front Page):

  • arrangePlease use this properly!--Indicates the article's layout on the Front Page:
    • lead One-across (the article in the "1-spot")
    • left Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the left side
    • right Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the right side
  • image — The image name (omit File:). There should always be an image, but if you leave this blank, the null image Spacer.gif will be used
UnNewsEXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

Use of "type=" produces graphics like this. Use them only in the 1-Spot. In the side-by-side leads (2- through 5-Spots), these graphics mess up rendering on smaller screens.

  • type
    • Normally none; otherwise, one of the following:
    • breaking for especially timely or time-critical stories
    • special
    • original for stories with {{Original}} instead of real sources
    • exclusive for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive because we're interviewing ourselves
    • navel-gazing for UnNews articles that revolve around UnNews
    • urgent
    • panic for "PANIC in the SKIES"
    • editorial for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
    • column for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
    • feature for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
  • title — The page name (omit UnNews:); that is, the headline
  • short_titleOptional--If the page name is too long or doesn't look like a headline, provide the desired headline here.
  • summary — The first sentence or two of the story. If you can write a funnier lead by pulling stuff from throughout the story, that would be funnier.

Important notes:

  • If you put vertical space between the calls to {{Lead article}}, comment them out, or space will be output that will throw off the relation between articles.
  • If not using type, set it to none. Just blanking it doesn't work. If not using short_title, turn the whole line into a comment: <!== short_title= -->. To put it back into service, just remove the special characters. Don't remove the lines completely; that makes it harder for the next editor to see the correct form to follow.
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