Template:Lead articles

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REMEMBER: PLEASE USE THE "arrange" PARAMETER PROPERLY! EXAMPLES:
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This is {Lead articles}, the template for all five articles on the UnNews Front Page.
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It calls {Lead article}, which renders each of the five articles. Click Preview and
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detailed instructions will appear.
   
| arrange = lead (for the lead story)
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1-SPOT-->{{Lead article
| arrange = left (to place a story on the left)
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|arrange = left
| arrange = right (to place a story on the right)
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|dept = none
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|image = Sewel.jpg
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|title = Lord Sewel: It wasn't coke and whores
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|border = none
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|summary = '''[[London|WESTMINSTER, London]]''' -- Lord Sewel insisted that [[video]] footage allegedly showing the Peer snorting [[cocaine]] off two prostitute's chests was merely a misinterpreted "family video."
   
ALSO: IF YOU USE NEWLINES BETWEEN TEMPLATE CALLS, COMMENT THEM OUT, OR YOU WILL GET <P></P>s (NEW PARAGRAPHS) IN BETWEEN YOUR NEWS STORIES, WHICH MAY THROW OFF THE SPACING.
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Sewel added that, despite these accusations, he has no intention of quitting his position as arbiter of standards and conduct in the [[House]] of Lords.
   
IMPORTANT NOTE: When not using a parameter, please put it between comment tags to prevent it from interfering with the template. When you want to use a previously unused parameter, simply remove the comment tags from around it. If the parameter isn't there yet, just add it.
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Types:
 
breaking - for especially timely or time-critical stories
 
special
 
original - for stories with {{Tl|Original}} instead of real sources
 
exclusive - for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive
 
because we're interviewing ourselves
 
urgent
 
editorial - for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
 
column - for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
 
feature - for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
 
   
Add an image_width parameter to change the image width.
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1A-SPOT-->{{Lead article
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|arrange = right
Blank template:
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|dept = none
{{Lead articles 2/a
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|image = Mitch McConnell.jpg
|arrange = ( lead | left | right )
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|title = US Senators do a deal
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-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
|arrange = lead
 
|image = Pantohorse01.jpg
 
<!-- |type = -->
 
|title = Pantomime horses are 'really humans' scandal
 
 
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|summary ='''[[London|LONDON]], [[United Kingdom]]''' --
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|border = none
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|summary = '''[[Washington, D.C.|WASHINGTON, D.C]]''' -- The [[U.S. Senate]] met in a rare Sunday session so that both [[Political party|political parties]] could show they had not grown rusty at hypocrisy.
   
Small children and parents are angry with the government that much loved pantomime horses are really 100% human.
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The occasion was the [[highway]] spending bill, on which both parties were allowed amendments. Republicans got to vote to repeal [[Obama-care]], as it had been weeks since such a vote. Like the previous four dozen votes, it had no actual effect. Democrats, for their part, revived the '''Export-Import Bank''' — then resumed bashing the [[rich]].
   
In DNA tests conducted by vets after a free [[Guinness]] tasting contest, 20 pantomime horses were examined and to be revealed to be two people in fake horse fur costumes. This was '100% proof' and yes, pour me another'.
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
   
Shocked entertainment agents and talent agencies had long accepted pantomime horses to be genuine. Now it seems that for years the entire industry had been working in [[Fish_pun#Alternatives_to_the_fish_pun|blinkers]] and hadn't carried out their own tests to determine whether a pantomime horse was a genuine equine or was in-fact a machine stitched costume containing two bald middle aged blokes. Possibly from [[Newcastle]].
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2-SPOT-->{{Lead article
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-->{{Lead articles 2/a
 
 
|arrange = left
 
|arrange = left
|image = silvio sylvia.jpg
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|dept = none
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|image = Martin O'Malley.jpg
|title = Silvio moves on
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|title = US parties fight spate of plain-speaking
 
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|summary = '''ROME, Italy'''
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|border = none
Media mogul, presidential hopeful and connoisseur of cuddly companions Silvio Berlusconi has regretfully had to let one of his latest acquisitions go. Silvio and the generously endowed Silvia Mammaroni looked like an item for at least a week or so, but despite intimate pizza meetings and facing the incandescent papparazzi, poor Silvia is no longer at his side.
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|summary = '''[[Washington, D.C.|WASHINGTON, D.C.]]''' -- {{InlineMedia|US parties fight spate of plain-speaking}} Both [[U.S.]] [[Political party|political parties]] are racing to get a handle on an [[annoying]] spate of candidates speaking plainly.
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The issue came to a [[head]] as [[Democrat]] Martin O'Malley improvised at a <code>#BlackLivesMatter</code> rally, declaring that "white lives matter." However, the [[Republican Party]] is also in turmoil, as [[Donald Trump]] said [[Mexican]]s who violate U.S. [[immigration]] law might not have the nation's best interests at heart.
   
''"It was the age problem"'', said the sober Silvio at a press conference, ''"she was getting on a bit, almost thirty you know, and I always said you can't trust a woman over thirty"''.
 
 
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-->{{Lead articles 2/a
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3-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = right
 
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|dept = none
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|image = Ant cartoon.jpg
|title = Race for Pope brings forth some unusual candidates
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|title = Ant-Man killed in patio accident
 
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<!-- |short_title = -->
|summary = '''[[Rome|ROME]], [[Italy]]''' --
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|border = none
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|summary = '''[[New York|NEW YORK CITY]]''' -- The [[Superhero]] world is in deep shock this morning as one of the [[planet]]’s very first — but until recently, mostly unknown — superhero '''Ant-Man''' was tragically burned to [[death]] by a 500&deg;C. [[heat]] ray of focused energy directly from the [[sun]] yesterday.
   
The race to become the next [[Catholic]] [[Pope]] has got a lot of <s>gamblers</s> people eager to influence the choice of who replaces [[Pope Benedict XVI]] when he steps down. The contest is said to be 'wide open' with a number of possible contenders.
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On the verge of being the first superhero from the formicate [[insect]] family to become a household name, Ant-Man stood no chance as seven-year-old Zach Thompson incinerated the compact crime-fighter with a magnifying glass as he was transiting a garden patio in a [[Brooklyn]] suburb.
   
The election which is due in March 2013 is already promising to be the 'dirtiest election' since 1492. This was when Pope [[wikipedia:Pope Alexander VI|Pope Alexander VI]] 'the Borgia Pope' poisoned his rivals to slide his fat Spanish arse onto St.Peter's Chair. So far these are the known candidates, with the former US Defense Secretary [[Donald Rumsfeld]] heading another list on the ''Unknown knowns''.
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}}<hr style="clear:both;width:98%;margin: 0 auto 8px auto;" /><!--
   
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4-SPOT-->{{Lead article
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|arrange = left
 
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|image = Chelsea1.jpg
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|dept = none
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|image = Tsakalotos.jpg
|title = President Chelsea Clinton jubilant as Bashar al-Assad dies of old age
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|title = Greek crisis enters crisis phase
 
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|summary = '''[[Washington DC |WASHINGTON DC]]''' -- Yesterday afternoon a cloud of radical Islamic gloom hung over secular Damascus as news spread that [[Syria]]’s long entrenched leader, Bashar al-Assad (82), had finally died of old age. Meanwhile, in Washington news of al-Assad’s timely passing was greeted with joy by President Chelsea Clinton (67) and her team of inbred [[Disney|Plutoc]][[rats]].
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|summary = '''[[Brussels|BRUSSELS]], [[Belgium]] (updated)''' -- Eurozone ministers have turned the relative molehill of a [[Greek]] bailout deal into an Olympus-sized [[mountain]] that is straining the very foundations of the European Union.
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On the brink of making their first-ever right decision, the [[EU]] quickly returned to form by arguing about national agendas, backstabbing and general divisiveness.
   
President Clinton said the death of Al-Assad marked a well-orchestrated “strategic victory” for Wall Street and a breath of musty air for western meddling in Middle Eastern tribal affairs.
 
 
}}<!--
 
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5-SPOT-->{{Lead article
 
|arrange = right
 
|arrange = right
|image = LordJimbo.jpg
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|dept = none
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|image = A14965461098200973A.jpg
|title = Wikia to offer "gold membership" for wikis
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|title = Tories propose BBC reforms
 
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|summary = '''EVIL WIKIA&trade; HEADQUARTERS, San Francisco, [[California]]''' -- In order to address the flight from Wikia&trade; over issues of advertisements, Wikia&trade; has recently announced an ad-free option. Under the new gold-membership option, a wiki can become ad free in exchange for donations to cover the cost of web hosting.
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|border = none
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|summary = '''[[Parliament|PARLIAMENT]], [[UK]]''' -- [[Culture]] Secretary John Whittingdale unveiled the [[Conservative Party]]'s white paper on the [[BBC]], saying it should not continue to be "all things to all people," especially now that there is a white paper that is.
   
"We have had many wikis leave over the issue of advertisements," said [[Jimbo Wales]], CEO and evil overlord of [[Wikia]]&trade;. "By self-hosting, wikis can avoid any unwanted advertisements.
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But shadow culture secretary Chris Bryant claimed to be mystified by Government's proposal. He said the nation should be free to continue enjoying great presenters such as [[Jimmy Savile]] (pictured).
   
}}
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}}<noinclude>{{-}}
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{{Lead article doc}}</noinclude>

Latest revision as of 16:32, July 27, 2015

Sewel
WESTMINSTER, London -- Lord Sewel insisted that video footage allegedly showing the Peer snorting cocaine off two prostitute's chests was merely a misinterpreted "family video."

Sewel added that, despite these accusations, he has no intention of quitting his position as arbiter of standards and conduct in the House of Lords. Full story»

Mitch McConnell
WASHINGTON, D.C -- The U.S. Senate met in a rare Sunday session so that both political parties could show they had not grown rusty at hypocrisy.

The occasion was the highway spending bill, on which both parties were allowed amendments. Republicans got to vote to repeal Obama-care, as it had been weeks since such a vote. Like the previous four dozen votes, it had no actual effect. Democrats, for their part, revived the Export-Import Bank — then resumed bashing the rich. Full story»


Martin O&#039;Malley
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- (Gnome-speakernotes listen) Both U.S. political parties are racing to get a handle on an annoying spate of candidates speaking plainly.

The issue came to a head as Democrat Martin O'Malley improvised at a #BlackLivesMatter rally, declaring that "white lives matter." However, the Republican Party is also in turmoil, as Donald Trump said Mexicans who violate U.S. immigration law might not have the nation's best interests at heart. Full story»

Ant cartoon
NEW YORK CITY -- The Superhero world is in deep shock this morning as one of the planet’s very first — but until recently, mostly unknown — superhero Ant-Man was tragically burned to death by a 500°C. heat ray of focused energy directly from the sun yesterday.

On the verge of being the first superhero from the formicate insect family to become a household name, Ant-Man stood no chance as seven-year-old Zach Thompson incinerated the compact crime-fighter with a magnifying glass as he was transiting a garden patio in a Brooklyn suburb. Full story»


Tsakalotos
BRUSSELS, Belgium (updated) -- Eurozone ministers have turned the relative molehill of a Greek bailout deal into an Olympus-sized mountain that is straining the very foundations of the European Union.

On the brink of making their first-ever right decision, the EU quickly returned to form by arguing about national agendas, backstabbing and general divisiveness. Full story»

A14965461098200973A
PARLIAMENT, UK -- Culture Secretary John Whittingdale unveiled the Conservative Party's white paper on the BBC, saying it should not continue to be "all things to all people," especially now that there is a white paper that is.

But shadow culture secretary Chris Bryant claimed to be mystified by Government's proposal. He said the nation should be free to continue enjoying great presenters such as Jimmy Savile (pictured). Full story»



Instructions for {{Lead articles}} (Edit them) (Return to the Front Page):

  • arrangePlease use this properly!--Indicates the article's layout on the Front Page:
    • lead One-across (the article in the "1-spot")
    • left Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the left side
    • right Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the right side
  • image — The image name (omit File:). There should always be an image, but if you leave this blank, the null image Spacer.gif will be used
  • dept — An optional "department" legend that will appear centered above the headline. Use them only in the 1-Spot; in the side-by-side leads (2- through 5-Spots), these graphics mess up rendering on smaller screens. Lowercase letters will become small capitals, but they won't look very good. Typical "departments" are:
    • BREAKING NEWS or URGENT for stories that either are relevant to big real-world news, or are not
    • EXCLUSIVE for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive because we're interviewing ourselves
    • PANIC in the SKIES — prized by all journalists, especially if it should have been the Happiest Day of the Year
    • NAVEL-GAZING for UnNews articles that revolve around UnNews
    • FEATURE for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
    • ORIGINAL for stories with {{Original}} instead of real sources
    • EDITORIAL for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
    • COLUMN for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
  • title — The page name (omit UnNews:); that is, the headline
  • short_titleOptional — If the page name is too long or doesn't look like a headline, provide the desired headline here.
  • summary — The first sentence or two of the story. If you can write a funnier lead by pulling stuff from throughout the story, that would be funnier.

Important notes:

  • If you put vertical space between the calls to {{Lead article}}, comment them out, or space will be output that will throw off the relation between articles.
  • If not using dept, set it to none. If not using short_title, turn the whole line into a comment: <!-- short_title= -->. To put it back into service, just remove the special characters. Don't remove the lines completely; that makes it harder for the next editor to see the correct form to follow.
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