Template:Lead articles

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Obama laugh
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The U.S. Government said the next Presidential election will be the "Election of 2020," just as Microsoft skipped directly to "Windows 10" to "distance" its new software from Windows 8.

The Republican Party has solicited funds for years claiming Obama could cancel the "Election of 2016." But John Boehner opted not to put actual ideas in the way of the imminent Republican sweep in what is still known as the "Election of 2014." Full story»


GeorgeClooneyAmmal
VENICE, Italy -- George Clooney has finally come off the political fence and declared his intention to become the next American President, reinforcing his European Liberal credentials by marrying British-Lebanese legal eagle Ammal Alamuddin.

Clooney's decision has disappointed many women fans and the entire female population of Greece. Full story»

Flirt au Bord de la Mer
SACRAMENTO, California -- Governor Jerry Brown has signed SB967, a law that codifies exactly when a woman has given consent to have sex.

Sex will now be "opt-in," while spam email will remain "opt-out." The law states that silence does not constitute consent, but moving toward one's partner or nodding the head might. That is for a jury to decide. There will be a standard government form to sign, before disrobing or flirting, to minimize legal liability. Full story»


No Voice England
WESTMINSTER, England -- The success of last week's Scottish referendum in provoking more powers for the Scottish Parliament has produced a groundswell in England, which for 300 years has had no parliament except the national one.

An English Parliament could leave the British one to focus on important matters, while an English Queen could reign alongside the British one. Full story»

SalmondBeastie1
HOGWARTS, Scotland -- There was dancing down the cloisters as top magic school 'Hogwarts' confirmed they had beaten something even more horrible than Lord Voldemort: The Salmond Beastie.

Plans to move Hogwarts to a theme park near London will be 'reviewed' if another Beastie returns. Full story»



Instructions for {{Lead articles}} (Edit them) (Return to the Front Page):

  • arrangePlease use this properly!--Indicates the article's layout on the Front Page:
    • lead One-across (the article in the "1-spot")
    • left Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the left side
    • right Of the pairs of side-by-side articles, the article on the right side
  • image — The image name (omit File:). There should always be an image, but if you leave this blank, the null image Spacer.gif will be used
UnNewsEXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

Use of "type=" produces graphics like this. Use them only in the 1-Spot. In the side-by-side leads (2- through 5-Spots), these graphics mess up rendering on smaller screens.

  • type
    • Normally none; otherwise, one of the following:
    • breaking for especially timely or time-critical stories
    • special
    • original for stories with {{Original}} instead of real sources
    • exclusive for "exclusive interviews," especially when they are exclusive because we're interviewing ourselves
    • navel-gazing for UnNews articles that revolve around UnNews
    • urgent
    • panic for "PANIC in the SKIES"
    • editorial for stories tagged as UnNews Editorials
    • column for stories tagged as UnNews Columns
    • feature for articles that are featured on the Uncyclopedia main page
  • title — The page name (omit UnNews:); that is, the headline
  • short_titleOptional--If the page name is too long or doesn't look like a headline, provide the desired headline here.
  • summary — The first sentence or two of the story. If you can write a funnier lead by pulling stuff from throughout the story, that would be funnier.

Important notes:

  • If you put vertical space between the calls to {{Lead article}}, comment them out, or space will be output that will throw off the relation between articles.
  • If not using type, set it to none. Just blanking it doesn't work. If not using short_title, turn the whole line into a comment: <!== short_title= -->. To put it back into service, just remove the special characters. Don't remove the lines completely; that makes it harder for the next editor to see the correct form to follow.
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