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'''Afghanistan''' is a country located in [[Central Asia]] ''and'' in the [[Middle East]], serving as a vital bridge between “nations that like to blow themselves up” and “nations that nobody really cares about. It is considered the roach motel of nations. Nations check in, but they don’t check out.
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Ah, [[Orange Construction Barrels|construction barrels]]. So seemingly innocent. However, if you look deeper, I'm sure you'll find that something sinister lurks inside. Inside of the 14th barrel, to be exact. And that thing, my friends, is a '''[[Barrel Clown|barrel clown]]'''.
   
====History====
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===== So What Exactly IS a Barrel Clown? =====
===== Achaemenid Invasion =====
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I'm glad you asked. A barrel clown is a clown that sleeps in every 14th construction barrel on the road. They sit in there all day, eating sandwiches until somebody hits their barrel with their car. If you do happen to hit a barrel clown's barrel, he will hop out from under his orange home and into your car, whether you like it or not. You hit the barrel, now it's your responsibility to take care of the little fella. How, you ask?
The [[Iran|Persians]] (under the Achaemenid Dynasty) were the first people to invade Afghanistan. Led by [[Darius the Great]], the Persians took control in [[550 BCE]]. As the first invaders of Afghanistan, the Persians had no history to learn from. Under Achaemenid rule, the Afghan people engaged in bloody tribal revolts and persistent resistance.
 
   
===== Greek Invasion =====
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===== Diet =====
In approximately [[330 BCE]], the [[Greece|Greeks]], under the rule of [[Alexander the Great]], became the second great power to touch the Afghan [[Vietnam|tar baby]]. Under Greek rule, the Afghan people engaged in bloody tribal revolts and persistent resistance.
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First of all, have the right food on hand. All that a barrel clown can eat is sandwiches. If you do not have any, he will die, and when barrel clowns die, they smell like rotten crayons and take an awful long time to decompose. Always have the ingredients for a sandwich ready, and make sure you have enough ingredients to create different sorts of sandwiches. Barrel clowns hate monotony.
   
===== Scythians, Sassanians, and White Huns Invade =====
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:'''[[Barrel Clown|Read more...]]'''
Following Greek rule, present-day Afghanistan was invaded by various tribes from Central Asia, include the Scythians, the Sassanians, the Hephthalites (or White Huns), and the Turks (or Göktürks). None of the occupations were able to endure, as all of these invaders eventually succumbed to bloody tribal revolts and persistent resistance.
 
   
:'''[[Afghanistan|Read more...]]'''
 
   
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''Recently featured'': [[Afghanistan]] - [[J.D. Salinger]] - [[Fecal E.Coli]] - [[Keira Knightley In A White Corset And Kate Beckinsale In A Black One]] - [[Niggers]] - [[Uncyclopedia Brown]] - [[The Most Quotable Smackdown of All Time]]
''Recently featured'': [[J.D. Salinger]] - [[Fecal E.Coli]] - [[Keira Knightley In A White Corset And Kate Beckinsale In A Black One]] - [[Niggers]] - [[Uncyclopedia Brown]] - [[The Most Quotable Smackdown of All Time]] - [[Gibberish]]
 

Revision as of 06:39, November 30, 2005

Barrel clown


Ah, construction barrels. So seemingly innocent. However, if you look deeper, I'm sure you'll find that something sinister lurks inside. Inside of the 14th barrel, to be exact. And that thing, my friends, is a barrel clown.

So What Exactly IS a Barrel Clown?

I'm glad you asked. A barrel clown is a clown that sleeps in every 14th construction barrel on the road. They sit in there all day, eating sandwiches until somebody hits their barrel with their car. If you do happen to hit a barrel clown's barrel, he will hop out from under his orange home and into your car, whether you like it or not. You hit the barrel, now it's your responsibility to take care of the little fella. How, you ask?

Diet

First of all, have the right food on hand. All that a barrel clown can eat is sandwiches. If you do not have any, he will die, and when barrel clowns die, they smell like rotten crayons and take an awful long time to decompose. Always have the ingredients for a sandwich ready, and make sure you have enough ingredients to create different sorts of sandwiches. Barrel clowns hate monotony.

Read more...


Recently featured: Afghanistan - J.D. Salinger - Fecal E.Coli - Keira Knightley In A White Corset And Kate Beckinsale In A Black One - Niggers - Uncyclopedia Brown - The Most Quotable Smackdown of All Time

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