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== [[Richard M. Nixon]] ==
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* Article feature date: 3 January 2015
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>3 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Richard M. Nixon}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
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== [[Jim Jarmusch]] ==
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=== 03 January 2015 ===
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{{FeatArticleImg|Nixon-eats-pupu.jpg|150px|link=Richard M. Nixon}}
* Article feature date: 8 July 2009
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'''[[Richard M. Nixon]]''' (January 9, 1913 – April 22, 1994) was an American home stereo-recording enthusiast, known bulk buyer of balaclavas, noted expert on Washington-area hotels, and the 37th President of the United States to be frequently referred to as a "Dick".
* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>8 July 2009<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Jim Jarmusch}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> {{#if:{{REVISIONID}}|{{#dpl:title=Jim Jarmusch|uses=Template:FA|mode=userformat|resultsheader=<span style="color: green; font-weight: bold">✔ FA has been added.</span>|noresultsheader=<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Featuring is not complete until the feature code is added to the article.</span>}}|<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Don't add this to the article until this section has been saved.</span>}}
 
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=== 08 July 2009 ===
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Nixon rose to political prominence following his election as a Californian member for the House of Representatives, fully embracing all he'd learned from the state that gave the world Hollywood — namely the hubris, contempt for the law of the land, an aptitude for issuing the least sincere of apologies, and a pathological desire to force fuzzy little animals into any piece of media he released. With his expansion of American intervention in Vietnam, Nixon even provided a second exotic location full of loose women where a man could chase glory, blow all his hopes and dreams and wind up as a chronic alcoholic in downtown Los Angeles. '''([[Richard M. Nixon|more]]...)'''
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'''[[Jim Jarmusch]]''' is not a filmmaker. He is an [[artist]] who happens to make films. If you have ever seen a Jarmusch film—and the chances are that you have not because normal theaters can't bear the weight of his brilliance and his films are rarely ever seen except by privileged smart people—and you did not consider it the pinnacle of cinematic artistic genius, then you are a [[moron]].
 
   
You are not worthy.
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== [[North Korea at the 2012 Summer Olympics]] ==
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* Article feature date: 9 January 2015
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>9 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|North Korea at the 2012 Summer Olympics}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
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''' Early life '''
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=== 09 January 2015 ===
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{{FeatArticleImg|NorthKoreanAthlete.png|200px|link=North Korea at the 2012 Summer Olympics}}
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'''[[North Korea at the 2012 Summer Olympics|North Korea]]''' competed '''at the 2012 Summer Olympics''' hosted by [[London|Airstrip One]] with 51 athletes and secured 4 gold medals, 2 bronze medals and 45 international citizen athlete medals - the latter awarded posthumously. The North Korean team's motto was "Down with the unfair exploitation of athletes", changed since the unfortunate death of their motto manager at the 2010 World Cup.
   
Jarmusch was born in black and white silence, from very early on uncannily resembling [[Nick Cave]] with grey hair. His father made wry jokes in which timing and ensuing silence contributed more to the humor than the punch line.
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In the 2012 Olympics North Korea was remembered more for its campaign against the International Olympic Committee's exploitation of the workers than its performance at the games. This campaign met minimal success as the bourgeoisie seemed perfectly content to carry on broadcasting the Olympics despite comrade Kim-Jong Un's calls for pepsi to be drunk along with coca-cola at the Olympic games - preferably shaken, not stirred.
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As the countries paraded into the main Olympic stadium, the North Korean flag was held aloof by Pak Song-Chol until at about three hundred metres around the track when it was dipped as the procession passed the North Korean ambassador's box and the massed band played the national anthem, "Under the red flag, I'm trapped" composed of course by [[Yoda|Yoda-Ping-Yu]] and resembling the desperate struggle of a worker to relieve himself of a giant red flag that fell on him during a protest. The worker subsequently relieves himself and adds that yellow touch to the red North Korean flag. '''([[North Korea at the 2012 Summer Olympics|more]]...)'''
   
As a child, he was stuck permanently in a corner of his parents house reading [[Jack Kerouac|Kerouac]]. When he was a little older, he became dreadfully disillusioned, and set out on the road, usually with two other characters, making his way to some destination or other for no considerable reason.'''([[Jim Jarmusch|more]]...)'''
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== [[Nirvana]] ==
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* Article feature date: 13 January 2015
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>13 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Nirvana}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
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== [[UnTweets:George Peterson]] ==
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=== 13 January 2015 ===
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{{FeatArticleImg|Kurt.jpg|150px|link=Nirvana}}
* Article feature date: 9 July 2009
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'''[[Nirvana]]''' was a 1990's band from a sea atoll who invented the ''grunge'' genre, or a state of ultimate bliss induced by an enormous amount of [[drugs]] in the [[Buddhism|Buddhist]] religion. The group was created when Kurt Cobain, Krist Novoselic, and {{w|Aaron Burckhard|drummer}} after {{w|Dale Crover|drummer}} after {{w|Dave Foster|drummer}} got together to try to imitate the [[Beatles]], but with [[electricity]]. The endeavor skyrocketed to super-stardom as the friends put their hallucinogen-induced inspiration into [[music]]. Nirvana's success widely popularized [[alternative rock]], thus making the name of the music genre highly [[Pathological liar|inaccurate]]. They were also the precursor to [[punk rock]], skin rock, and [[rock paper scissors]].
* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>9 July 2009<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|UnTweets:George Peterson}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> {{#if:{{REVISIONID}}|{{#dpl:title=UnTweets:George Peterson|uses=Template:FA|mode=userformat|resultsheader=<span style="color: green; font-weight: bold">✔ FA has been added.</span>|noresultsheader=<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Featuring is not complete until the feature code is added to the article.</span>}}|<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Don't add this to the article until this section has been saved.</span>}}
 
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=== 09 July 2009 ===
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The band started in [[1987]] in Cobain's [[garage]] since his [[basement]] was under renovation. The group's habit of smashing their [[musical instruments|instruments]] against [[cats|anything lingering around]] after recording greatly displeased Cobain's [[father]] even though he worked as a [[car]] repairman. He soon threw Cobain out of the [[house]] at the mature age of [[twelve]], forcing him to wander aimlessly around the [[street]]s for a few years. While [[homeless]], Cobain met a toothless, [[drunk]]en [[hobo]] who offered him [[Singing|singing lessons]], a proposition he gladly accepted. These lessons had a huge impact on Cobain as he learned the valuable singing techniques of slurring one's [[vowels]] and [[screaming]] on-key, skills he would take advantage of on his later singles.
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'''Name:''' George W. Peterson<br>
 
'''Location:''' Chilly Parts of Scotland<br>
 
'''Bio:''' Newspaper editor ("The Kinrossie Times"), happily married to not only Sarah, but also to gardening.
 
   
'''Following''' 294<br>
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The relatively unknown band soon signed to the equally unknown [[Seattle]] independent record label {{w|Sub Pop}}, located in [[Somebody|somebody else's]] garage. In [[1988]], they recorded their first album, ''[[Bleach]]'', a name Cobain thought of while washing his underwear. Nirvana recorded the album with a [[karaoke]] machine, producing [[music]] that sounded like it came from the other end of a [[telephone]] made of a cord and two empty [[cat]] [[food]] cans, an effect that the general public mistook for a new, unique [[sound]] ultimately dubbed ''grunge''. ''Bleach'' remains Sub Pop's best-selling (and only) release to date. The relatively cheap $600 it cost to record the alternative symphony soon ballooned after Cobain acquired the habit of throwing himself right in the middle of the drum set after each show. This was resolved to an extent when the band decided to use the more resistant [[elephant]] skin drums rather than [[human]] skin ones, as they were not [[PETA]] members.
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'''([[Nirvana|more]]...)'''
   
'''Followers''' 1007
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== [[Lava lamp]] ==
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* Article feature date: 16 January 2015
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>16 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Lava lamp}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
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'''Saturday May 3rd'''
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=== 16 January 2015 ===
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'''[[Lava lamp|Lava lamps]]''' are lamps specifically designed for use by certain hikers and campers.Veteran hikers seeking to conquer volcanoes that have recently erupted are faced with a problem: [[Lava]] is nothing if not [[black]]. This means that conventional lanterns and flashlights do a poor job of illuminating it. When hiking at [[night]], the outdoorsman can stub his toe and often even trip and fall.
   
{{UnTweets/Tweetplate|Went for my fifth "Cabbage Check-Up" a few minutes ago. Sarah thinks I'm mad, but I don't want to miss anything, now do I?|13:35pm May 3rd|web}}
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[[Britain|British]] [[Accounting|accountant]] Edward Craven Walker, from [[Dorset]], down near Brain's End, invented the lava lamp in 1963. He had been watching a homemade [[egg]] timer on a stove-top at the [[pub]]. He would later insist he was stone-cold sober, and his mates insist he went home alone that night.
{{UnTweets/Tweetplate|Have got to start preparing for new arrival!|14:21pm May 3rd|web}}
 
{{UnTweets/Tweetplate|Sarah has just brought home the new cat, and she's settling in. She's eight weeks old, ginger, and incredibly excitable. I think she has [[OCD]]. Any ideas for names?|16:09pm May 3rd|web}}
 
{{UnTweets/Tweetplate|Sarah has put today's newspaper in the litter tray. Now how am I supposed to find out the news?|16:23pm May 3rd|web}}
 
{{UnTweets/Tweetplate|Just remembered I have the Internet! Who needs newspapers anyway!?|16:25pm May 3rd|web}}'''([[UnTweets:George Peterson|more]]...)'''
 
   
== [[Mrs. God's blog]] ==
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A mere two years later, Walker filed an application for a [[U.S.]] Patent for a harmless-sounding "Display Device." Patent 3,387,396 was issued in 1968, and we were "off to the races," as they say. Within a year, entire city blocks across [[America]] burned to the ground in race riots.
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Unlike conventional lighting sources, the lava lamp contains clear or translucent liquid ([[water]] will do fine) and blobs of colored ("coloured" according to the Patent documents) wax to provide superior illumination on the mountainside.Walker faced the daunting problem that wax would normally not cycle through the water but remain on top of it. He solved this problem by adding carbon tetrachloride to the wax.
* Article feature date: 10 July 2009
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'''([[Lava lamp|more]]...)'''
* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>10 July 2009<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Mrs. God's blog}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> {{#if:{{REVISIONID}}|{{#dpl:title=Mrs. God's blog|uses=Template:FA|mode=userformat|resultsheader=<span style="color: green; font-weight: bold">✔ FA has been added.</span>|noresultsheader=<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Featuring is not complete until the feature code is added to the article.</span>}}|<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Don't add this to the article until this section has been saved.</span>}}
 
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=== 10 July 2009 ===
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== [[Sex scene]] ==
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* Article feature date: 18 January 2015
Mrs God’s blog is republished from Facebook with permission of the author.
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>18 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Sex scene}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
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'''May 20th, 2009'''
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=== 18 January 2015 ===
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{{FeatArticleImg|sexscene1.jpg|140px|link=Sex scene}}
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'''[[Sex scene|Sex scenes]]''' in films is what it is all about really. Forget the rest of the movie, the special effects, fancy dialogue and the locations, what people really want to watch is vigorous, on-screen humping. Even in war movies or animation have subliminal sex splattered all over them. And I won't even bother talking about men stroking their guns in 'Thin Red Line' or super heroes running around in multi-coloured caps and condoms.
   
Hiiiii!
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What we all want to know is 'are they really doing it?'. A sex scene can be found in a [[movie]], [[book]] or [[television|television show]]. It may include explicit sex (as in [[pornography]]) or it may only be suggestive of "real" [[sex]], however; as a rule, it is better sex than you have ever had - or ever likely to have. If you have had better sex than that which is depicted in the scene, it is most likely not a real sex scene - it is probably just something weird you get off on.
   
Just a few words from me, Mrs God. I know you haven’t heard from me much over the years, but now that my hubby’s away…
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Sex scenes are often used to get underage minors to watch movies with an "R" rating. Often, the two (or more) people in a sex scene don't like each other, but are just doing it because they are paid to moan and wriggle when a fat slob in a director's chair tells them to. And if it is a real pornographic film, that ugly bloke you always see? - yes that's the producer getting his money shots..but that is more ''sex obscene''.
   
First of all, let me reassure everyone “[[God]] is not dead”. We heard a lot of that in the 60s. It wasn’t true then and it’s not true now. Phew!
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Film makers are not dumb. They know sex scenes in movies increase profits by up to 7 billion percent but really, when was the last you had sex and said: ''"Wow! This is just like the movies..."''
   
It '''''IS''''' true that He picked up a bit of a [[coke]] habit – and I can tell you, God moved in some peculiar ways back then. But we’ve finally persuaded Him to face His issues and booked Him into [[Rehab]] – He said “No, no, no” for thirty years and when God says “No” it’s very hard to change His mind but He's finally checked into the Priory and we're hoping He can work through some of His issues and make a full recovery. '''([[Mrs. God's blog|more]]...)'''
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Yeah, thought so.'''([[Sex scene|more]]...)'''
   
== [[Wild Bill Hickok]] ==
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== [[Power]] ==
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* Article feature date: 22 January 2015
* Article feature date: 11 July 2009
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>22 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Power}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
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=== 11 July 2009 ===
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=== 22 January 2015 ===
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{{FeatArticleImg|Creation_of_the_Sun_and_Moon_face_detail.jpg|140px|link=Power}}
'''James Butler Hickok''' (May 27, 1837 - August 2, 1876), better known as '''[[Wild Bill Hickok]]''', was a figure of renown in the American Old West. He is remembered for his skills as a gunfighter, sharpshooter, marksman, and his excellent aim with a firearm. Hickok's exploits gained him such great fame that he earned the moniker of "Bill" despite that nickname having virtually no connection to his actual name. This nickname also inspired similar nicknames for other men named William.<ref>Though research has shown that the sizes of all of these subsequent men's genitals pale in comparison to Hickok's.</ref> Hickok's horse was called ''Black Nell'', and he owned two Colt 1851 Navy Revolvers, along with a rarely-used Colt 1855 Air Force Bazooka.
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'''[[Power]]''' . A word that is doubtless familiar to you and a concept you probably think you understand but yet, how much do we you really know about '''power'''?
   
Hickok came to the West in the little-known Boron Rush of 1849. To help finance his Boron-seeking operation, he became a part-time stagecoach driver. He spent most of his time in the territories of [[Nebraska]] and [[Kansas]], progressing from stagecoach driver to stagecoach driver/lawman, and finally to lawman. He served in the [[Union]] army during the [[Battle of Gettysburg|American Civil War]], giving his allegiance to [[Abraham Lincoln|Lincoln]] and his modest beard over [[Robert E. Lee|Jefferson Davis]]' pretty-boy hairstyle.<ref>Hair meant ''a lot'' to those living in the 1800s.</ref> He gained publicity after the war as a scout, marksman, skilled juggler, and professional gambler. Hickok was involved in countless Wild West shootouts, often shooting people off of roofs and using [[cactus|cactusses]] for cover, among other Wild West stereotypes. He was ultimately killed while playing poker in a [[North Dakota|Dakota Territory]] saloon. '''([[Wild Bill Hickok|more]]...)'''
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''Not much!''
   
== [[Fan service]] ==
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That's correct, bodiless, unexplained, yet helpful italicised text! We know next to nothing about '''power''' which, in its majesty is in all things, if you can comprehend such a concept. It could even be within you! You could have '''power''' right now and be unaware of the staggering implications of that fact.
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* Article feature date: 12 July 2009
 
* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>12 July 2009<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Fan service}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> {{#if:{{REVISIONID}}|{{#dpl:title=Fan service|uses=Template:FA|mode=userformat|resultsheader=<span style="color: green; font-weight: bold">✔ FA has been added.</span>|noresultsheader=<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Featuring is not complete until the feature code is added to the article.</span>}}|<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Don't add this to the article until this section has been saved.</span>}}
 
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=== 12 July 2009 ===
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''I could have power?''
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A '''fan''' is a useful device for keeping oneself cool in hot weather. However, whether your fan is electric or one of the more traditional "folded pieces of paper," it will occasionally require service. Fortunately, there are service stations in most major cities.
 
   
Prior to [[World War 2]], fans were serviced primarily by overweight men with ill-fitting pants. However, when these men were drafted, the industry was taken over primarily by young women. Due to the suspicious number of fan serviceman deaths at the Battle of Iwo Jima, the industry has remained [[sexy|dominated]] by females to this day.
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Quite possibly, I can usually tell very quickly whether or not somebody has '''power'''. I have '''power''' and as a result I feel a [[Love|certain kinship]] towards others with '''power'''.
   
Fan servicewomen pride themselves on their competence, professionalism, and complete inability to find clothes that cover more than 40% of their skin.
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''I'd love to hear more about power!''
   
Although fan service is a rewarding job, it also comes with certain challenges. In order to draw attention to the plight of these women, this article will focus largely on those challenges. '''([[Fan service|more]]...)'''
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Of course you would! '''([[Power|more]]...)'''
   
== [[UnNews:The God Interview]] ==
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== [[Constitution of the United States (actual text)]] ==
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* Article feature date: 27 January 2015
* Article feature date: 13 July 2009
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* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>27 January 2015<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|Constitution of the United States (actual text)}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> (Only add this '''after''' this page has saved)
* Feature code: <code><nowiki>{{FA|date=</nowiki>13 July 2009<nowiki>|revision=</nowiki>{{lastrevision|UnNews:The God Interview}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki></code> {{#if:{{REVISIONID}}|{{#dpl:title=UnNews:The God Interview|uses=Template:FA|mode=userformat|resultsheader=<span style="color: green; font-weight: bold"> FA has been added.</span>|noresultsheader=<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Featuring is not complete until the feature code is added to the article.</span>}}|<span style="color: red; font-weight: bold; font-size:105%">Don't add this to the article until this section has been saved.</span>}}
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=== 13 July 2009 ===
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=== 27 January 2015 ===
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{{FeatArticleImg|Sigs.jpg|160px|link=Constitution of the United States (actual text)}}
''Worshipped by some, denied by others, UnNews brings you this exclusive interview with the one and only '''God'''. Where did we come from? Where did we go? Whatever happened to Cotton Eye Joe? What makes the Almighty Creator tick? We hope to find out these things and more in this unprecedented UnNews event.''
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'''[[Constitution of the United States (actual text)|We the People of the United States]]''', in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
   
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Section I. Any male constituent who has attained the Age of Twenty-One years shall vote for a nobleman of his choosing to represent him in the executive legislature. He shall freely cast his choice on a ballot in a designated [[election|voting]] bureau and deposit the ballot in a box. After all the constituents accomplished their duty of Citizenry, the box contents shall be dumped in the nearest river and the predetermined winner be announced to the People.
   
'''UnNews:''' What can I say, God, if I may call you so, it’s a pleasure to have you with us today. This is a real step up from last week’s guest, a morbidly obese kid that almost scored an on-air on [[American Idol]].
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Section II. Any elected representative in the Land of the Free shall receive 10 slaves Free of charge, only shipping and handling to pay and shall be refunded if not satisfied before 30 days.'''([[Constitution of the United States (actual text)|more]]...)'''
 
'''GOD:''' Well, I’m glad to be here. And “God” is fine. Tack on “Almighty Omnipotent” if you wish.
 
 
'''UnNews:''' Well, Almighty Omnipotent God, I must say you really look a lot like I imagined. The robe. The long white beard. The wise, stern countenance. It’s all there.
 
 
'''GOD:''' This physical presence you are now visualizing is no more than a projection of your image of Me. You better be making Me look good!
 
 
'''UnNews:''' Uh, oh yes, trust me; you’re looking hot, God. [[George Clooney]]’s got nothing on you. Look out ladies!
 
'''([[UnNews:The God Interview|more]]...)'''
 

Latest revision as of 08:23, January 27, 2015


edit Richard M. Nixon

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edit 03 January 2015

Nixon-eats-pupu

Richard M. Nixon (January 9, 1913 – April 22, 1994) was an American home stereo-recording enthusiast, known bulk buyer of balaclavas, noted expert on Washington-area hotels, and the 37th President of the United States to be frequently referred to as a "Dick".

Nixon rose to political prominence following his election as a Californian member for the House of Representatives, fully embracing all he'd learned from the state that gave the world Hollywood — namely the hubris, contempt for the law of the land, an aptitude for issuing the least sincere of apologies, and a pathological desire to force fuzzy little animals into any piece of media he released. With his expansion of American intervention in Vietnam, Nixon even provided a second exotic location full of loose women where a man could chase glory, blow all his hopes and dreams and wind up as a chronic alcoholic in downtown Los Angeles. (more...)

edit North Korea at the 2012 Summer Olympics

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edit 09 January 2015

NorthKoreanAthlete

North Korea competed at the 2012 Summer Olympics hosted by Airstrip One with 51 athletes and secured 4 gold medals, 2 bronze medals and 45 international citizen athlete medals - the latter awarded posthumously. The North Korean team's motto was "Down with the unfair exploitation of athletes", changed since the unfortunate death of their motto manager at the 2010 World Cup.

In the 2012 Olympics North Korea was remembered more for its campaign against the International Olympic Committee's exploitation of the workers than its performance at the games. This campaign met minimal success as the bourgeoisie seemed perfectly content to carry on broadcasting the Olympics despite comrade Kim-Jong Un's calls for pepsi to be drunk along with coca-cola at the Olympic games - preferably shaken, not stirred. As the countries paraded into the main Olympic stadium, the North Korean flag was held aloof by Pak Song-Chol until at about three hundred metres around the track when it was dipped as the procession passed the North Korean ambassador's box and the massed band played the national anthem, "Under the red flag, I'm trapped" composed of course by Yoda-Ping-Yu and resembling the desperate struggle of a worker to relieve himself of a giant red flag that fell on him during a protest. The worker subsequently relieves himself and adds that yellow touch to the red North Korean flag. (more...)

edit Nirvana

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edit 13 January 2015

Kurt

Nirvana was a 1990's band from a sea atoll who invented the grunge genre, or a state of ultimate bliss induced by an enormous amount of drugs in the Buddhist religion. The group was created when Kurt Cobain, Krist Novoselic, and drummer after drummer after drummer got together to try to imitate the Beatles, but with electricity. The endeavor skyrocketed to super-stardom as the friends put their hallucinogen-induced inspiration into music. Nirvana's success widely popularized alternative rock, thus making the name of the music genre highly inaccurate. They were also the precursor to punk rock, skin rock, and rock paper scissors.

The band started in 1987 in Cobain's garage since his basement was under renovation. The group's habit of smashing their instruments against anything lingering around after recording greatly displeased Cobain's father even though he worked as a car repairman. He soon threw Cobain out of the house at the mature age of twelve, forcing him to wander aimlessly around the streets for a few years. While homeless, Cobain met a toothless, drunken hobo who offered him singing lessons, a proposition he gladly accepted. These lessons had a huge impact on Cobain as he learned the valuable singing techniques of slurring one's vowels and screaming on-key, skills he would take advantage of on his later singles.

The relatively unknown band soon signed to the equally unknown Seattle independent record label Sub Pop, located in somebody else's garage. In 1988, they recorded their first album, Bleach, a name Cobain thought of while washing his underwear. Nirvana recorded the album with a karaoke machine, producing music that sounded like it came from the other end of a telephone made of a cord and two empty cat food cans, an effect that the general public mistook for a new, unique sound ultimately dubbed grunge. Bleach remains Sub Pop's best-selling (and only) release to date. The relatively cheap $600 it cost to record the alternative symphony soon ballooned after Cobain acquired the habit of throwing himself right in the middle of the drum set after each show. This was resolved to an extent when the band decided to use the more resistant elephant skin drums rather than human skin ones, as they were not PETA members. (more...)

edit Lava lamp

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edit 16 January 2015

Lava lamp

Lava lamps are lamps specifically designed for use by certain hikers and campers.Veteran hikers seeking to conquer volcanoes that have recently erupted are faced with a problem: Lava is nothing if not black. This means that conventional lanterns and flashlights do a poor job of illuminating it. When hiking at night, the outdoorsman can stub his toe and often even trip and fall.

British accountant Edward Craven Walker, from Dorset, down near Brain's End, invented the lava lamp in 1963. He had been watching a homemade egg timer on a stove-top at the pub. He would later insist he was stone-cold sober, and his mates insist he went home alone that night.

A mere two years later, Walker filed an application for a U.S. Patent for a harmless-sounding "Display Device." Patent 3,387,396 was issued in 1968, and we were "off to the races," as they say. Within a year, entire city blocks across America burned to the ground in race riots. Unlike conventional lighting sources, the lava lamp contains clear or translucent liquid (water will do fine) and blobs of colored ("coloured" according to the Patent documents) wax to provide superior illumination on the mountainside.Walker faced the daunting problem that wax would normally not cycle through the water but remain on top of it. He solved this problem by adding carbon tetrachloride to the wax. (more...)

edit Sex scene

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Sexscene1

Sex scenes in films is what it is all about really. Forget the rest of the movie, the special effects, fancy dialogue and the locations, what people really want to watch is vigorous, on-screen humping. Even in war movies or animation have subliminal sex splattered all over them. And I won't even bother talking about men stroking their guns in 'Thin Red Line' or super heroes running around in multi-coloured caps and condoms.

What we all want to know is 'are they really doing it?'. A sex scene can be found in a movie, book or television show. It may include explicit sex (as in pornography) or it may only be suggestive of "real" sex, however; as a rule, it is better sex than you have ever had - or ever likely to have. If you have had better sex than that which is depicted in the scene, it is most likely not a real sex scene - it is probably just something weird you get off on.

Sex scenes are often used to get underage minors to watch movies with an "R" rating. Often, the two (or more) people in a sex scene don't like each other, but are just doing it because they are paid to moan and wriggle when a fat slob in a director's chair tells them to. And if it is a real pornographic film, that ugly bloke you always see? - yes that's the producer getting his money shots..but that is more sex obscene.

Film makers are not dumb. They know sex scenes in movies increase profits by up to 7 billion percent but really, when was the last you had sex and said: "Wow! This is just like the movies..."

Yeah, thought so.(more...)

edit Power

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edit 22 January 2015

Creation of the Sun and Moon face detail

Power . A word that is doubtless familiar to you and a concept you probably think you understand but yet, how much do we you really know about power?

Not much!

That's correct, bodiless, unexplained, yet helpful italicised text! We know next to nothing about power which, in its majesty is in all things, if you can comprehend such a concept. It could even be within you! You could have power right now and be unaware of the staggering implications of that fact.

I could have power?

Quite possibly, I can usually tell very quickly whether or not somebody has power. I have power and as a result I feel a certain kinship towards others with power.

I'd love to hear more about power!

Of course you would! (more...)

edit Constitution of the United States (actual text)

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edit 27 January 2015

Sigs

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Section I. Any male constituent who has attained the Age of Twenty-One years shall vote for a nobleman of his choosing to represent him in the executive legislature. He shall freely cast his choice on a ballot in a designated voting bureau and deposit the ballot in a box. After all the constituents accomplished their duty of Citizenry, the box contents shall be dumped in the nearest river and the predetermined winner be announced to the People.

Section II. Any elected representative in the Land of the Free shall receive 10 slaves Free of charge, only shipping and handling to pay and shall be refunded if not satisfied before 30 days.(more...)

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