Tauren

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The Taurens or big cow-people, are amongst the races of World of Warcraft. Though all are stupid they possess the ability to cast spells as Shamans or Druids and make an excellent first character for n00bs. As druids they click animals like an unstoppable force.

They are currently with the Horde, a group of ugly races banded together like nerds on the playground. They rely on the rest of the Horde for protection from the almighty Alliance as they themselves have no real abilities.

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[edit] Appearance and Culture

Taurens appear as 400 lb cow-people. Their size is deceptive in comparison to their actual strength. In fact, Taurens are the weakest race in the Horde. Their hair is like KISS, only stupid looking. These fat beasts can only compare in size to the superior trolls.

The Taurens live in tribes scattering the Horde's land. These tribes constantly fight amongst eachother in competition for women. They share a collective oral tradition in story telling with eachother and outsiders, but nobody listens who cares about what a cow has to say?.

[edit] Abilities

Racially, the Taurens have War Stomp (which shows that their pissed) and can turn into chickens after level 40. While a chicken they can Inspire nearby allies giving improved speed to run with. Like chickens they cannot fly and without nearby allies are an easy kill.Even in groups the Taurens present no real threat to the Alliance. The only real use a Tauren has in a group is their ability to draw enemies in the form of helpless chickens.

[edit] Classes

Taurens are the least versatile of creatures behind the Blood Elves. The can only be Druids, Shamans, and Rogues making them near useless on the battlefield. The most these pitiful creatures can hope for is to be adopted by the more powerful Trolls. Then again Trolls would rather eat the little chickens.

Taurens are at their strongest as Druids, but even then they are weak. As Druids they are able to cast spells and click on animals at a pace only matched by the humans. Keep in mind, however, that their spells only benefit their allies and don't make them competitive in any way. In their homeland Druids are the closest thing to badasses. After so many levels the Druid can change into the form of chickens allowing the Tauren a much more appropriate role as the Horde mascot.

Shamans are a failed attempt at giving every ability known to man to these weaklings. In fact, they are able to turn invisible, cast spells, and fight pathetically. On the battlefield Tauren Shamans can only survive standing behind the others. At home the Shamans are only allowed to heal others as to make them look useful though their really not.


Rogue Taurens are only able to stealth, which makes sense considering their inability to fight despite their size. While invisible nobody has to worry about them getting hurt. The Alliance believe Rogue Taurens are non-existant as they can't be found.

[edit] Relations

The Horde treats the Taurens as cheap labor and give them little-to-no powers. It's in this regard that the Taurens are kept weak and therefore unable to rise above their status as chicken mascots. Orcs treat them with only minimal respect to keep their moral high enough to suicide through the battlefield with the survivors to be eaten by trolls.

The Alliance slaughters the Taurens with glee. Only the Rogue Taurens survive their raids. The humans are the strongest threat against the Taurens (as they are to all), using M16's and Frag grenades at war.

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