Talk:What you didn't know about Mario & Luigi

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Revision as of 22:06, April 7, 2011 by Shabidoo (talk | contribs)

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edit Actually Pretty Good

This article is actually pretty good, even though it's been tagged as NRV. Really I think it's just because it's really short.

edit Suggestions:

Individual things to think of: Monkey ass dude, funny but maybe its borderline childish. Could be touched on. Amazing quest filled with monsters: Try to think about the most absurd things that happen like i said before "coin boxes" and tube pipes and glowing stars" but pick funny ones that seem funny in combination (including the mustache and suspenders that seem funny already". On level four, etc... its cute, but theres no reason to stick to just one game. It might be funnier to use individual worlds, or choose a very unromantic place that Mario would think is romantic "So I brought her to one of those under ground caves, you know, cause I had a discount and I made it all romantic with all those ghosts lighting up the place and shit". Anyhoo, what I put there isnt that funny, but instead of just chosing levels each time, pick a location we can recognise, make MArios character seem like a sad loser, and when Sonic takes her away, make him seem like a slick dude by taking her somehwere cool. Just a suggestion, in any case, level numbers dont really work well. Male bonding, I dont know if thats meant to be homoerotic or not, if so, that should be much clearer and funnier. If not, better to call it buddy time perhaps, and make it seem even more full of debauchery, try to make it sound funnier and greasier. Crash yoshi, great place to expand, what were you on, what did you crash it into, did anyone else get hurt, make him seem really pathetic and a loser without him realising how sad he sounds. American idol, could be replaced with an even sader sounding show, like project runway, or old Seinfeld episodes, or even threes company too. Maybe have a more sarcastic tone with the princess, lets check up on how much better she is without me" as the heading.

Over all, amazing job on fixing things up and I like the images a whole lot more! Be ironic about The style seems to switch a little, it might be better to go over it and make it more consistant. As well some of the sentences are a little awkward, quick fast sentences but then extra detail maybe in the wrong order like "bowsers butter cup" or "he´d have the upper hand" maybe its better to break the sentences more. Also the general additude of Mario seems at first, really vein and then like he really wants you to understand him and then he doesnt give a shit. Might be better to just choose the vein part, im awsome, this is what happen and if you dont believe me, fuck you throughout the entire story, while at the same time appearing like a loser throughout the whole story. Something to think about.

Anyhooooooooo...good luck im sure it will be featured!!!! --ShabiDOO 22:06, April 7, 2011 (UTC)

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