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(see backside of photo for proof of this phenomenon.) lol, very good one. the last two paragraphs are hardly funny as they name specific online clans or something which might not be known by everyone (expesially not by me, as a non-gamer :p)


I am a Troll, that is, a large, "monstrous" creature indigenous to the steppe of Eurasia and to the wilderness of Iceland. Though we have a long, illustrious history, have made many achievements in the fields of haircare and pencil-hiding, and are eleven feet tall on average with powerful muscles and great big pointy teeth, we, as so many other minorities, are unjustly blamed for things which are not our responsibility.

Taking this forum as an example, I could cite you (had another correspondent not already done so) a long list of examples of why this site, as with all sites, represents all that is wrong with the world, which would be infinitely improved with the simple changes I have in mind: I refer you, Sir, to the practice known in colourful language as "Trolling".

I myself have never understood this term, nor as a child did I understand the idea that you humans seem to have of us toll-bridge terrorists, eating all those who come near. I live in an apartment in Reykjavik. My parents were born in Stockholm and led successful careers in management until they retired. I do not understand what it is about us that can be "verbed" to describe the practice of putting all one's narrow-minded and ill-considered ramblings into a semi-coherent stream of consciousness and posting it to a web page - my father, for example, was well-liked at his office and received a gold-effect watch on retiring, and was never thought less of by his coworkers. Indeed, he was the life and soul of the office Christmas party, understanding about office liaisons and bottom-photocopying, and even joined in himself on occasion by eating someone in the spirit of fun.

All things considered I do not see why, in this enlightened age, you (for it is only you who are responsible, ultimately, for the content of the site you manage) or indeed anyone, would use such a mindlessly derogative term and go unchecked. Only this morning as I took my break at work, I found a post on your site which at first confused me, and then appalled me: Sir, until lunchtime I did not even know what "grits" were, and now I find a harmless breakfast staple is not only being used worldwide as a sexual metaphor, but that this usage is commonly blamed on my people and our culture.

Certainly it is true that, over time, some Trolls have behaved irresponsibly, even eaten children, but we in general would never stoop so low as to harass any person by posting offensive, inflammatory or sexual remarks on a website. It is clearly all your fault - fix it, Sir, or face my moral judgment. Have you ever been eaten alive and rogered by an eleven-foot magical creature at the same time?

Yours in anticipation of a Final Solution,

       Magnus Trollensen, 


Added a real quote. OMG... we are doomed!

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