From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Osama Bin Laden, Saddam Hussein, crack cocaine, porn, tacos....what the crap? This article is new, and Shakira might be a good subject for an article, so I didn't add it to Forrest Fire Week. But this is just complete nonsense, and is therefore not funny. I hope it can be fixed up, probably by deleting almost all of the current content. CatastrophicToad 01:51, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
edit Wikipedia page
I think Wikipedia's page is funnier. Or at least the picture there is funnier than this whole article.
edit Rewrite, as demanded
OK, so there's my rewrite. It's funny as hell, but I think it may now be too truthful. For example, I tracked down the quote about dancing with her chest to get it exactly right, because I couldn't write anything better. And her lyrics, starting with the quote at the top, and continuing on to all of the songs about how small her breasts are.... Wow. She's much funnier than me. --Falcotron 00:47, 4 August 2006 (UTC)
edit Things in the article that are true
- All Shakira interview quotes.
- All Shakira lyrics.
- "Tus Gafas Oscuras," written at the age of 8, is probably her deepest song ever.
- All the stuff about her early life and career came right out of Wikipedia, but there was so much material I had to leave half of it out.
- She does seem to have a complex about her breast size. I almost feel bad making fun of her for it.
- The UN really did recently honor her for the Pies Descalzos Foundation, and she compared herself to Bono.
- She was accused to anti-semitic comments in a weird Internet chain-letter campaign, and the ADL exonerated her.
- One of her lawsuits, the one in Puerto Rico, was settled when it was determined that her record label had negotiated with the other guy's label, paid him money, and given him credit on the album, but both parties were too stupid to notice.
- "Underneath Your Clothes" really is "Eternal Flame," although it sounds more like the Atomic Kitten cover than the Bangles original. --Falcotron 00:59, 4 August 2006 (UTC)