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So what d'yall think? Better than the old one, or no? Sorry I wiped out the old article, but it really was bad. In fact, it violated several "rules" of being funny, not the least of which were "Don't be nonsensical", "if you have to be nonsensical, be consistent", and "don't be stupid or cliche". If you guys would prefer the old article, feel free to revert it. Otherwise see if you can help refine the humor here. --Bub

The old one was fair, the new one may end up VFH'd. This version has been widely accepted and edited already, which is a good sign. Dawg.gif » Brig Sir Dawg | t | v | c » 04:33, 22 Oct 2005 (UTC)
I'm glad you think so. Though a word of disclosure, only you and MadMax have edited it other than me. I'm just too lazy to log in. :-) --Bub
The old one used to be just one sentance (PHP stands for Pure Hardcore Porn and therefor spread over internet), so I had extended it a little bit to the story about the pope and so on. Ofcourse it's better to have it more related to the real PHP, so it's OK you've wiped the old one out :P It was just a quick thingy to have a little more than one sentence.
Leke (the retard) Says... This article is hazardous to your health. It is so funny, I had an asthma attack before I reached the half way mark. I don't know WTF i am doing BTW. Leke does not read beginners guides and likes to bait gurus. Jan sometime 2007.

edit php's design objectives:

Confuse javascript coders. (NO WAY are we going to use the same syntax, SO THERE!)
Overcome the excessive ease of use of HTML. It was getting to the stage where every man and his dog was making websites. This had to be stopped.
{Overcome} ('"the "lack" {of} \'adequate\' => \'punc\' . \'tuat\' . \'ion\' in webpages"');
Reduce the excessive security of HTML, so antivirus coders are kept in a job. This is achieved by allowing webpage visitors to type any SQL commands they like into form fields.
mAkE the wEb cAse sEnsitive. Geeks just love weird capitalizations but it's no fun if the users don't have to fOLLoW SuiT, to the letter.
Overcome the excessive ease of use of php, by making it object-oriented. It was getting to the point where most men and most canines were understanding it, and that just HAD to be fixed.
Add another language to the thirty-seven already needed to make a webpage. Why not? The more the merrier, I say. --Lantash (talk) 22:14, June 4, 2012 (UTC)
"Confuse javascript coders." L.O.L. Yep. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usTue, Jun 5 '12 7:02 (UTC)
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