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This article was nominated for deletion on May 19, 2012.
The result of the discussion was Kept.

Rewrite. There, you happy, Alpha? 06:51, May 19, 2012 (UTC)

Homie, I praised your rewrite on VFD, despite not looking like an encyclopedia page, but have now dredged up some of the old version and slapped it together with yours. Spıke Ѧ 00:26 20-May-12
Slapped is the optimum word. The changes involve recreating the entire article, which is up for a VFH vote. A little less drastic and a little more let the IP tell the story. Aleister 00:42 20-5-'12
Your sending an article to honors that was on the docket for deletion (and would not have been deleted) was theatrics--and, again, we don't really want to feature an article on Kwanzaa in springtime. The old version had a tiny bit worth saving, and has more now. I won't try to restore this until after any honors, and do hope Anon contributes his opinion, but at the least we have the makings of two good pages now. Spıke Ѧ 00:47 20-May-12
You're probably right on all counts except the theatrics - I found the page very good and nommed it. Yes, December would be better (can we "pass" it on VFH and hold it until December?). I thought your rewrite of the IP's rewrite missed the sense of his page, and although you had very good additions they could have been melded into the Q and A format that the IP had established. This could be a combintion of duo rewrites which might take time to meld so nothing is lost from either. Aleister 1:00 20-5-'12
They absolutely did miss the sense of Anon's contribution; he wrote a Homie rant and I cleaned up an encyclopedia article. Maybe juxtaposition is less preferable than separate articles, but they ought not simply to be merged, as they are trying to do completely different things. If someone types Kwanzaa, they are equally likely to be amused by either approach, and a "disambiguation page" might be fun. I agree that featuring ought to be deferred to be Seasonal. Spıke Ѧ 01:29 20-May-12
You could do Kwanzaa/Classic (which is funny in itself). I've started a category for classic or old pages and if you can think of any I missed, please add them. If it's featured a season-friendly slot could be arranged for later this year (just about when we're finally get rid of the 2012 nonsense). Signing off soon, Aleister 1:40 20-5-'12
It is there for now, but I don't agree that your nomination for VFH marks the Homie version as the favorite; I think the Classic one should be the "encyclopedia article" and the Homie one belongs in some other namespace. Spıke Ѧ 02:09 20-May-12

edit Comment from the author

I wrote this because I saw some idiot adding crap to the old version, which was already an exercise in How To Be Racist Without Being Funny or Creative, and I got pissed. I figured that if an actual black dude saw it, he might be pretty pissed, too, and that's what inspired this broadly-drawn caricature. Obviously, it still perpetuates several stereotypes,[1] and I bet there are people who will find the punchline especially odious. If this article has any redeeming qualities, it's because it contains actual facts about Kwanzaa (even that "Jesus was psychotic" comment, look it up), and is funnier than the old version.

As for it getting featured...I don't care, one way or the other. I'm just glad that somebody understood what I was aiming for, and actually found it funny. It might be more appropriate for December, but featuring it close to the holiday itself might bring Uncyclopedia bad pub, especially if somebody is offended. In the middle of May, it would probably slide under the radar. 01:45, May 21, 2012 (UTC)

P.S. somebody should probably upload that picture, because it's external, and it might disappear some day.

  1. All black men are militant, all black men are angry at Whitey, all black men are constantly involved in paternity disputes -- although that last stereotype, like all the best ones, is based on something true. The Internet tells me that 72% (!) of African-American children are born to single mothers. Is that because their fathers are all chronically irresponsible jerks? I don't know, and as I'm whiter than Uwe Boll, and I'm not a sociologist, and I don't have any black friends, I'm probably not the person to ask.
Since it's common knowledge that the average IQ of black people is lower than that of white people, it then follows that, in general, they are more esthetically pleasing to the women folk (per the universally accepted smart-people-are-evolutionarily-predestined-to-be-ugly theorem). And it being a common fact that pretty people sleep around and procreate a lot more than ugly people, it is hardly surprising that 72% of African-American children are born to single mothers. Or maybe it's just because they're generally more religious and don't get their undesired children aborted. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 02:15, 21 May 2012
Now you're just making fun of me. 03:02, May 21, 2012 (UTC)
Maybe. You'd be surprised how much of it is true, though. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 04:00, 21 May 2012
Oh, and nice seeing you around again, Masked Crumpeteer. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 02:24, 21 May 2012

edit Featured

Your page is getting a relatively large amount of votes, the most For votes in awhile (and I don't think you've voted on it yet). Nice work. Since you're IP changes, any chance of you signing up as a member so, if nothing else, we can stick a feature template on your user page. And if best comes to best, maybe you'd want to stick around for awhile. (I've put the request in to upload the last pic) Aleister 3:27 22-5-'12

I find it's bad luck to vote on one's own article. 18:35, May 22, 2012 (UTC)
You come aboard now, Mister, and take your accolades like a man or woman (or both). Just take them. We need a user page to put your feature template on anyway. And "you find", hmmmmm, you seem to have done this before, do you write for wikipedia or someplace? Aleister 18:49 22-5-'12
Shh, nothing to see here, move along. If you can be Zana Dark, I can be anony-mouse. 18:54, May 22, 2012 (UTC)
Yeah, we encourage you to create an account so you can edit your feature. (Unfortunately, we currently do not allow unregistered and new users to edit featured articles. Usually this means you need to age a little (about 4 days) and make about 10 edits under your new name. I think a great name would incorporate one of your favorite cartoon characters (such as Qzekrom - I'm named after a Pokémon).) --Qzekrom sig trans Sir CuteReshiramOnTheRadio [CUNPBJ'12PLS(0)] 20:13, May 22, 2012 (UTC)
I guessed the secret identity earlier today, but I will not tell. Good articlel. And it's funny as a Detroit hell with devils running all over the place that I can say openly now that I'm Zana Dark, because nobody will believe it. It's hilarious, and gives me goosebumps and creamy dreams at night. Aleister 2:25 23-5-'12
Why, you had sex with Zana Dark? --Qzekrom sig trans Sir CuteReshiramOnTheRadio [CUNPBJ'12PLS(0)] 23:12, May 23, 2012 (UTC)

edit I don't know what's been more fun...

  • ...Nominating this page off of the VFD page whilst high.
  • ...Watching it get the most votes of any feature here in a long time.
  • ...Seeing SPIKE get all jiggly about it.

--Aleister 2:55 23-5-'12

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