Talk:India

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"This Reverse Psychology worked as the British got confused and left."

This is really a debatable strategy for Independence fight. Is it applicable in rest of the world?

If this is the only thing you find debatable on this page, I suggest you read it through once more, then get confused and go to the bathroom. -- Swami A. Suresh 11:20, 2 March 2006 (UTC)

Contents 1 This page is too serious 2 New Unit 3 Pretty Lousy Article! 4 For those making additions/alterations to Language policy 5 I think this article is excellent! 6 Interesting, but I read somewhere that this was what India was: 6.1 Addition 7 From Pee Review 8 Redo 9 Lack 10 Rice 'N Dal 11 Aussie People 12 Cricket thing 13 mating 14 Remove the mating section and other racist shit.........YOU NOT 15 Why the hell is this article locked? 16 Indian girls marry animals 17 Cricket Incident Edit Warring 18 Call center 18.1 Economy 18.2 Government

[edit] This page is too serious

I don't think there's enough funny and too much serious. Most pages are the opposite: too much serious making things generally sill and not funny, but this is trying too hard to not be this. its totally pathetic . the writer needs to get a life .

This is why I added the call centre bit. And added some repetition into the listing of the things indians are known for (repeating cricket).

Another thing is that it sounds too serious in the general vibe. Pretty anally retentive. 202.147.44.80 04:17, 5 July 2006 (UTC)

I agree. This article needs major cleanup. --sohil 19:57, 10 July 2006 (UTC)

[edit] New Unit

Apparently, 1 lot = 1.125E25

We should make a page about this scientific discovery. --Donut Buy one!|Get one Free!|F@H|MUN 05:06, 16 July 2006 (UTC)

Wow, when did bashing become humor?

[edit] Pretty Lousy Article!

I feel sorry for those who think this page is humurious. Its time someone rectified content on this page to give it a taste of reality. The current content is utter crap. - User 219.64.11.37

you could help by adding the "might be funny in an alternate universe" template by adding this, {{Alternate Universe}}, to the article if you feel strongly about it and and leaving a slightly more detailed critique here; like which sections, you think, are pathetic, or how you would like to see the article improved. of course, if you could edit a section or two, to make it more humorous, you would be showing by example: which would be a better way of approaching the whole thing. -- mowgli 09:50, 26 September 2006 (UTC)

[edit] For those making additions/alterations to Language policy

• Please be funny in your additions. Avoid stating facts (that will inevitably be from a subjective POV in this section) unless you are ready to parody them in the same edit. Everything goes only if it is funny. Keep in mind that this is a contentious section and a long tirade of insults, one from each side, does not make for fun reading. -- mowgli 06:42, 15 October 2006 (UTC)

[edit] I think this article is excellent!

I'm suprised it hasn't been featured yet. Maybe it contains too many injokes (eg. lal loo). Perhaps you have to be Indian to get it??

Good job, well done to those who have contributed to this article. - Tt22 22:11, 27 December 2006 (UTC)

THIS WAS HILARIOOOUS!! you may have to be indian/pakistani/bangladeshi to get some parts though

[edit] Interesting, but I read somewhere that this was what India was:

India is a fictional place, rumored to have been created by J.R.R Tolkien whilst he wrote the Lord of the Rings trilogy. He had planned for it to be a large area occupied mainly by hobbits, leprechauns and other fictional creatures such as the French, for example. In the un-edited version of the book, which only 3 people in the world own, this section is still included. In this legendary tome, the region contributes for a large proportion of the population of Middle Earth (roughly 17%) and many of the inhabitants have spread to other areas, such as The Shire, and set up small corner shops and take-aways.

This passage was taken out of the mainstream edition of the book as Tolkiens trusted friend Samuel L. Jackson thought that the name of the place seemed too much like a real place called "England", and also bore some resemblance to the fictional place "Bethlehem" which was quoted in the famous children's book "The Bible", written by Will Ferrell.

Although only three people got to read the un-edited version, the idea of "India" has spread through word of mouth. In China, if a child is bad, then there parents will say "Hey, if you don't behave we'll send you to India", which in English roughly translates to "Shut up!" Also, in Zimbabwe "India" is considered to be the depiction of heaven given to them by their Messiah. They try to prove themselves to Tolkien, their Messiah, by re-enacting famous events in his trilogy, such as the "Battle of Helm's Deep" and Frodo's struggle in Shelob's lair.

[edit] Addition

That bit about Tolkien etc works much better added into the article, rather than replacing it entirely. RabbiTechno 19:20, 19 March 2007 (UTC)

[edit] From Pee Review

Endnotes:

On Humour and Concept: First, this is a very long and complex article. The concept of telling Indian history in various programming languages is quite nice, but it dribbles away after the first attempt and comes to nothing in the end. By contrast, the section on "Current Day Indians" is nothing but weak-minded race hatred; it's not clever and not amusing. There are similar examples of assholism here and there in other sections.

Much of the political material may be funny to Indians but is hard for someone like me -- a country boy from Oregon, USA -- to understand.

"Until the population of India exploded, India was a country where each person was allotted 5 square millimetres of space for living(dont forget to menion 60% reservations for st sc bc and obc)(10% proposed reservation for muslims andn bangladeshis).(Wait... there is no reservation yet for the obc's. It is in the list of 'Things to do this term" of the government.)'"

ST, SC, BC, OBC? Who are these people?

The authors have choices: they can attempt to make the esoteric parts of the article more accessible to outsiders by concisely explaining what's what. Or they can ramp up the jargon until it becomes an obvious joke (the ST, SC, XT, BC, OBC, XBC, ABC, XXX, WMD, and LOL groups will be adjusted to a fare-the-well with a spanner; and the HURGH, GK, FB, NORK, and FU groups will be awarded a bicycle handgrip for living expenses).

So: Much of the difficulty comes down to consistency and coherency. An article this length needs strong structure. Lacking that, the reader becomes confused by the sheer volume of disorganized information. Organize this article. Make it consistent if you can. For example, the material under the heading "Sexual Practices" is about a politician, not the sexual practices of Indians. Some of the material under "Economy" is about sexual practices, not economy. The material under "Current Day Indians" appears to be concerned not with India but with immigrants as seen by a juvenile Paki-basher. The last item under "Indian Names in the West" appears to belong under "In the News". The last paragraph under "Sport" has nothing to do with sport.

It's a jumble. Fix it.

On Prose: The English spelling and grammar needs help. "Anonymosity" is not a word. The sentence "George Bush, in an act of solidarity with the republic of IVC, promised the world to hunt down evil, vandal 'Mama,' also known a 'Yo Mama' in Arabic, from the areas of Pakistan and Afghanistan where he was feared to be vandalizing from" should be taken apart and re-assembled into something sensible. The entire "Current Day Indians" section is in a style different from the rest of the article and it should be deleted. Seriously, the writing needs work.

On Images: Why in the FUCK do we have to see that inanely grinning fool in blackface on so many articles? The one captioned "India is Diverse"? Delete him, he's irrelevant. The MSPaint pucture of a "Modern-day Indian" is ugly and stupid. The pictures of train riders and of the missile parade are, however interesting and appropriate.

On Race Hatred: I've already said that the section titled "Current Day Indians" is stupid and offensive. There are other little lumps of racist garbage scattered around the article. I feel like someone wrote an insider-funny article on India, and a mentally disturbed and not-very-smart paki-basher came along and shoehorned some badly-written hate-cruft into the article later.

"The basic anthem of the Indian population is 'Panchod' [cussing] which literally means sister fucking due the rigorous practice of this the Indian population has become really large and fucked up."

Pointless, vicious slander is not satire. Delete every instance of it and the article will be better.

Readers are almost always willing to laugh along with someone poking good-humoured fun at a nation, its insititutions, and its people. It's especially funny if the humorist is an insider and can share some of the esoteric quirks and silliness of his people with outsiders. But mean-spirited obscenity, demeaning slander, and racism will virtually always offend intelligent readers.

There's too much hatred in this article.

---

I see this article has a relatively long and contentious history. The nastiest section and the ugly MSPaint image were the work of a non-notable user named "poonepounder" who was active only on March 12 2007 and made only 10 edits total to the wiki. His edits to Africa were stupid and racist, and were quickly reverted. His edits to Jew were minor and eventually overwritten. ----OEJ 16:57, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

I notice also that this was originally posted as a complaint from a reader ("displaying hatred and a little insulting too") and not really a request from a writer for advice. Obviously, I agree with the complaint...except that I would say not "a little insulting" but "rife with rampant assholism" instead. The problem is that the article currently has no primary author willing to do the very considerable work of making the article consistent and funny. Too bad. ----OEJ 17:09, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

---

OK, final note: I deleted the crap written by poonepounder and cleaned up some of the formatting, restored a sensible version of "Sexual Practices", deleted a few stupidities. It's still a deeply flawed article, though. ----OEJ 17:32, 5 May 2007 (UTC)

Someone should put in somewhere that Indians are worthless pieces of shit. Filthy cowraping retards. I fucking HATE Indians. (This comment was added by anonymous IP 75.206.38.87)

[edit] Redo

I propose that we delete the whole article, and start over. A lot of stuff here is racist, too serious, and doesn't explore more non-racist stereotypes.

Hdgcfcf 23:57, 5 June 2007 (UTC)

While I agree that the article is in a bad shape, I think there are some fairly good funny elements which should be retained. SillyGuy 07:33, 6 August 2007 (UTC)

I see nothing "racist" in there. You must be yet another thin skinned, whinging indian. How typical!!--196.20.73.59 14:40, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

[edit] Lack

1 lakh = 100000 so 1 lack =10^5

202.54.254.66 07:25, 7 December 2007 (UTC)

[edit] Rice 'N Dal

All Indians eat Rice 'N Dal TM every meal.

202.54.254.66 07:25, 7 December 2007 (UTC)

[edit] Aussie People

The cricket part was written by a descendant of European criminal scum who is born and brought up in the land of criminals. It is obvious that those scumbags have psychopathic racist criminal mentality inherited into their genes. If Indians are racists what hell are you? Go back and read what you have written calling Indians as "baboons" you bastards are racists too. Racism provokes racism. I cannot believe that this website allows such utterly biased racist content. I thought this websites portrays truth in a funny way though a bit offensive here and there. Indigenous Australians were given the right to vote in Commonwealth elections in Australia in November 1963. Learn how to spell "capital" its not capitol deuche bags.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Convictism_in_Australia

Learn how to spell DOUCHE BAG, you whinging indian douche bag. That one line alone has shown you for what you really are - another smart mouthed indian who deserves a smack in the face. Fu<k off and burn an effigy of ms dhoni, you 3rd world piece of scum. Don't forget to hit it with your shoe for added effect.

You know damn well that indians are the most racist people on this planet - your entire hindu religion is based on racism!!! I take it you're a high caste indian, (seeing as you can afford a PC).

No wonder we want you all out of our country, all you do is whinge, whine, complain, cheat and drive our taxis. indians have no concept of loyalty whatsoever, you'd all sell your 8 year old sisters for a few rupees (hang on, thats called a dowry isn't it?) --196.20.73.59 14:52, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

[edit] Cricket thing

4 JUNE UPDATE-templars26 i changed the part where aussie simons was called a black and that part... i am sure that an angry aussie fan added that... i have chnged a few incorrect things. we did not think simons to be a black as reported by international media but simple thought he had resembled a monkey...(when i say we i refer to the people did that sad act) i dont want this to be a racial issue hence chnged the angle a bit + it wasnt very funny lets make this a funny article and not a article for hatred... ( i personally support the aussie team even though i am an indian... but we did not intend to racially make fun of andrew)

Who ever that retard was who wrote the part on the monkey calling (cricket) thing doesn't sound funny. Please rewrite that part.

I think it is pretty funny and should not be taken to heart. If you are an Indian Cricket fan or even just plain Indian, why don't you write the Australian equivalent. You could call us a bunch of pink skinned idiots who win cricket matches way to often. You could even say something like, why do you call your self white when you are actually pink and stink of smelly disgusting soap and deodorant and not curry and shit. No I think Indian people a nice people with comical accents, who may also be very smart and analytical but still comical. User:User:User:Merbabuuuu 01:08, 4 March 2008 (UTC)

I think you must be from Cairo Egypt User:User:User:Merbabuuuu 06:36, 5 March 2008 (UTC)

This part was written by a descendant of European criminal scum who is born and brought up in the land of criminals. It is obvious that those scumbags have psychopathic racist criminal mentality inherited into their genes. If Indians are racists what hell are you? Go back and read what you have written calling Indians as "baboons" you bastards are racists too. Racism provokes racism. I cannot believe that this website allows such utterly biased racist content. I thought this websites portrays truth in a funny way though a bit offensive here and there. Indigenous Australians were given the right to vote in Commonwealth elections in Australia in November 1963. Learn how to spell "capital" its not capitol douche bags.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Convictism_in_Australia

• Indigenous Australians were given the right to vote once they learnt how to vote. These people still have trouble fitting in and a lot of them still live in their tribes as homeless people in cities that were once bushland. The cities simply grew around them. Yes we did come from criminals, but now all the criminals are Arabs, Pakistanis, Indians, Meds and so on. And we did not evolve from monkeys, we came from Adam and eve whilst you came from a monkey and slowly evolved in semi human life form over thousands of years.

No I am not racist, just taking the piss. I actually like Indian people more than some Australian people. It was the Indian cricket fans that brought this upon themselves. You never heard Australian cricketers or fans calling Indians monkeys MerbabuBombaybelly 01:15, 5 April 2008 (UTC)

Australians are MONKEYS. Adam and eve my ass, idiots believe in a fairy tale shit. We Indians were civilized thousands of years before European cunts still hunting in forests and living on trees reproducing by incest. Now go eat shit and go fuck yourself.

Excuse me, even muslims believe in Adam and Eve. What do you believe in, gorillas turning into cricket players for India and then calling other black people monkeys.Beer Barrals Should be bigger 08:01, 22 April 2008 (UTC)

No they believe in ganesh, shiva, some sort of rat god, a monkey god and a gazillion other gods. They even build temples to worship their beloved cricketers. Fuck I hate you indians, you're all a bunch of whinging, whining little pussies who have no concept whatsoever of the real world. Burning the Aussie flag in Sydney last week was the final straw, I hope you get what the lebbos got in Cronulla. I'll be on the 1st flight over from Perth to lend the Sydney Aussie boys a hand.--196.20.73.59 14:57, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

[edit] mating

this part is jus ridiculous ... its not at all funny ! its derogatory and humiliating ! there is no need for mating thing ...its not a part of any other country's description

Thats because nobody ever before has ever thought of this, this is ground breaking and there should be one for every article. It should not be taken to heart. Go and write something similar about Australians, we won't mind, our sense of humor involves putting ourselves down User:User:User:Merbabuuuu 08:21, 9 March 2008 (UTC)

we don like to stoop to such a low level....its nt at all funny !! if making fun of women makes u ppl thnk u taking funny ..then god help u ! remove this ugly shit frm ths page

These are only jokes, relax and please write properly so I know whats being saidUser:User:User:Merbabuuuu 12:13, 9 March 2008 (UTC)

" The only difference is Indian women give birth through the arse and not the vagina, so all Indian people came out of their mothers arseholes. When Indian people have sex the mail Indian shoves his tiny penis in either his male of female partner’s arsehole, a couple of seconds later, after two of three ins and outs the Indian male deposits a small amount of seamen in the females arse crack. This is enough to get the Indian female pregnant. Nine months later the Indian female will suddenly break wind (not water like westerners) and get the urge to crap. The female will suddenly run off to the toilet and take a shit. After taking a shit the husband will come along and sift through the large heap of shit to look for the tiny foetus. After finding the baby and cleaning of all the bits of crap it is then sent of to live with and learn the ways of wild monkeys. After two to three years the baby is returned to its Indian parents. When it returns it comes back with that funny Indian accent that we all know, and says things like, curry curry curry give me curry in a hurry (repeatedly while moving his/her head from side to side quickly). That’s why, we Indian people are so comical to westerners even if we are trying to be serious. Lack of organisation"

u find this funny ????? i thnk who so ever has commented ths is a retard ..shame on him/her !

Don't make fun of the stronger side of border or you will get nuked, Punjab buttjab butfuk boy boy User:User:User:Merbabuuuu 06:48, 14 March 2008 (UTC)

Curry Curry Curry Give me Curry in a Hurry. Ho ho ho please we can meet up in person and talk about this man to Indian. I am not racist but I do think this is funny. When I was typing it, shhhh don't tell anyone, I actually pissed myself laughing. I went to work, I work in a corporate environment, I showed all the business people in the office what I had written, they couldn't stop laughing. I found it strange that some of the Indian people in the office got up and walked out though. One of them female started crying, I told her to fuck off. The next day the boss fired her for being a sower puss.User:User:User:Merbabuuuu 06:40, 10 March 2008 (UTC)

This guys thinks he is so funny. It's really just that he has a diminutive dick that he asks his mother to suck off every other night.

U pakis atleast start learning to behave on public forums... !!

U Indians atleast stop hiding away your small crutch behind Ganesha and sucking white cocks to get into london to sell your sisters in soho

HELLO The reference to the way Indians are born is very offensive. Take it down at once. I know the whole point of Uncyclopedia is to be funny and useless but there is a line and u guys have crossed it. PLEASE REMOVE IT AT ONCE.

[edit] Remove the mating section and other racist shit.........YOU NOT

This page is not a parody but the work of some sexually frustrated Indian hating beef filled cracker ass-licking pale skinned son of a bitch. I'm just venting. If the moderators of this site have any self respect or humility at all, they will remove such putrid bile from their site. It was probably that "Merbabu" Australian shit filled tape worm that crawled out of the ass of a kangaroo and feeds on koala menstrual blood. If that bastard son of a convict's aborginal whore ever sets foot in India he will get beaten to pulp and splattered all over the outback down-under his mother's fat ass... for spewing his personal hatred and bile especially against Indians. I hope he and his father find this hilarious, because I do.

As this has been locked for editing with highly racist content, it implies that the people with editing rights are fucking assholes( they themselves will agree to this and enjoy this). now somebody crapped about writing the same about australians. no. i will like to write the same about whoever wrote this crap. and here is in red letters written below this window, ´´Please read the Beginner's Guide, and please be funny and not just stupid´´. interesting.

Exactly, this is no fun - but sheer abusing.... I suppose the motto of this page is to have fun not trouble.

indian cricket players suck, and so do the fans. what losers. 100 crore people, and the only game they think they're world champions is in a game that is played for a whole day with some 10 or 11 loser countries over and over again. they have champions cup, asia cup, african's cup, crap cup and what not. but the end result is they play each other for like thousands of times coz there are no other teams to compete, but losers don't get tired watching it over and over again.

Thanks for your opinion. What does it have to do with this article? MrN  19:17, Jul 27

Hello my fellow indian and I say that without the capitol I. Thankyou for you comments and opinions on this literary masterpiece. I am sure that what you wrote about me above was done in good humor, I sure had a good laugh, and hey, no offense taken. I would be interested to see what you write about us Australian's. When you do this please keep me informed because I don't watch any Australian related articles. If you add something I may jump in and give you a hand. if you have any comment please feel free to leave them on my talk page. You have my permission to say whatever you want. Once again thanks for the laughs. MerbabuBombaybelly 08:11, 30 July 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Why the hell is this article locked?

I had some decent concepts for the article but alas , this article is locked. Cmon. Locking this article with that stupid crap still in it is sheer insult to readers of uncyclopedia.

I love new users like you. I really do. In the matter of only a few sentences, you've managed to communicate so much ignorance that I had to put duct tape over my ears just to stop my brain from leaking out after you melted it.

First of all, the article is not entirely locked. It is unlocked for registered users, which, as you indicated in your edit summary, was what you wanted. However, it takes four days before you can edit semiprotected articles. If you don't know what a semiprotected article is, or you want to know why, please do us all a favor and fucking Google it.

"sheer insult to readers of uncyclopedia"? Give me a break. If an article actually is locked - fully locked - it's for a good reason. Mostly because it's an in-joke, or it's part of a revert war, or some other practical reason. You see, you seem to be of the opinion that the administrators here are idiots with no sense of humor. Granted, one or two of them might be, but you have to be a douchebag and assume that the people that have been running and doing maintenance on this site for months, possibly years now, have no idea what they're doing, and you, a complete n00b, have every idea. Congratulations! You've just proven what an asshole you are.

As it is, it's semiprotcted to prevent more shit from piling in on it. We don't need IP diarrhea on a page like this, or even new user shit on it either.

Maybe if you have the patience to wait four days from the creation of your account, you might remember to come back and edit this article with your so-called "decent concepts". If so, good for you. Maybe you should write it down just in case you forget, as I predict that the six brain cells contained in your skull don't have the greatest memory capacity. Anyway, welcome to Uncyclopedia! – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • tweetings) 05:15 Sep 05, 2008

[edit] Indian girls marry animals

i have recently seen news articles regarding indian girls marrying dogs we should put this in the culture section or tradition section heres the link its very interesting http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/south_asia/3004930.stm

That would be to offensive. If you can make it sound funny without being to stupid, well then have a goMerbabuBombaybelly 09:21, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

I'm going to get a dog costume in the hope that this might apply to Shilpa Shetty. Mmm...Shilpa Shetty... Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs 12:24, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

[edit] Cricket Incident Edit Warring

Personally I don't think it's very much amusing, but hey - I don't know squat about cricket. What worries me more is that edit warring without either party trying to talk with the other one. Talk=good. Edit warring=both parties get banned. Talk, get an agreement, let me know what's the decision. ~ 12:18, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

I have stated clearly why that section should not be there....as I said when I first deleted it, 1)Racism and name calling without any humour has no place here. 2)This affair (something that happened on a cricket pitch and has long been forgotten is not important enough to find a place in an article about India. User Merbabu keeps reverting it without specifying a reason.--Sillierrabbit 12:57, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

You have stated that in change summary. I didn't see any attempt to talk with him directly. Nor did I see such attempt from his side. ~ 13:05, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

I agree that I did not talk with him directly; as the situation stands, I think it is for him to explain why that section should be there. I welcome any reasoning from his part, either directly to me or on here. I do not think he can convince me that this section is harmless, so rather than us reaching an agreement, maybe it is upto the admins or other users to judge. Do you think saying that africans are all half evolved ape men would be tolerated? Racial insults against any race is racism, you know. Devoting a long section for racist rants is unpardonable. However, if the majority here thinks it is in good taste (which I doubt), you may put the section back, Mordillo. Merbabu, we are waiting.--Sillierrabbit 13:39, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

You might have noticed that I didn't endorse that part not because of the racist angle but because it's not funny. Racism is widely done around here, as long as it's done in (semi?) good taste or is funny. See Jew Claw for that matter. Let's wait for the other gent's response. ~ 13:49, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

That section is not meant to be racist but more of a shit stir due to what happened at the cricket. Some people might get a laugh out of it. I am not racist myself and I would be more than happy to read an Australian version of the same thingMerbabuBombaybelly 22:55, 13 February 2009 (UTC)

I don't mind the text being removed but you could at least leave the image there. If you want you could add a picture of the Australian cricket team with Kangaroo heads or something of this nature MerbabuBombaybelly 22:58, 13 February 2009 (UTC)

You will remember that the whole controversy that day erupted because Andrew Symonds was called a monkey (and not a kangaroo). Monkey happens to be a racial insult, and kangaroo is not. Kangaroo, apart from being the national animal of Australia, is also an unofficial mascot of the aus team. Imagine someone putting an image of Andrew Symonds in a monkey head (I would be the first to remove that), and you know why that is racist. Also, once you remove the completely humourless text, putting the image there makes no sense. Apart from all this, you will do well to realize that the whole controversy died down in a few days, and has long been forgotten. There was a lot of bonhomie between the teams, and it is rather unfortunate that we rake up the issue here in such a tasteless and crass manner. Besides, there is so much to write funnily about India; this minor incident deserves no place here. Put in something FUNNY that everyone, not ust cricket watchers, would understand. And feel like laughing.--Sillierrabbit 05:14, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

mallus rock

Tag Line :(Tere maa ko sau kutte chode - sau wa tera baap! ) shld be changed its not funny at all...............

How about Lundfakir Gaylord Nikkul - King of the gaylords 08:44, 12 May 2009 (UTC)

[edit] Call center

I think this whole page should be written as a tech support center conversation about India, (there could possibly be misspellings to represent an accent)

"Yes, hello sir, my name is mike, how may I help you learn about India today?"

[edit] Economy

"Yes, I can connect you to billing, one moment please..."

[edit] Government

"Yes, I will connect you to my suppervisor right away sir..."