I used to live in G.R. and it really is a wonderful city. It is a little absurd but I guess that is okay here! Tell me what you think. Sorry for the kinda crude parts (if you disliked them.)
edit Better stuff.
We could come up with more/better stuff, such as more groups of people downtown, around Plainfield township, and near the river, and not just in Forest Hills. And not so many inside jokes about your friends and girls you're trying to hit on. We could also make jokes about the Caulder statues around the city. And the joke about Forest Hills being the only one, not funny. And not just because I went to Northview.
edit Hi there
I just joined Uncyclopedia, saw this entry and couldn't resist the temptation to help the world learn about Grand Rapids. I've lived here for most of my life and have also worked here some too. I've added some information detailing the history of Grand Rapids and detailing local news events--going for more of a satirical angle, which I hope is acceptable here! Seeing as I created links to non-existent pages, I'd like to get to work on making those.--QuantumDriver 06:07, 24 June 2006 (UTC)
edit Looks great
Yeah, the basic structure that I made this on wasn't very funny. It was just a quick thing I put together. I like the add-ons. They are very funny and gives it more of feel of G.R.
That pic brings a tear to my eye. Its makes this article that much better. Great job.
:: applauds ::
edit Article Still Centered Around Teenagers
But that aside, this article is now about Grand Rapids. Funny bullshit is better than simply bullshit. I am so tempted to change the whole "teenage clicks found in the area" section, but I guess I'll just leave it for now. The truth is, Grand Rapids is a moderately boring city of about a half million people in the metro and surrounding area that worships Gerald R Ford and is generally filled with well-off Dutch Republicans. If your name doesn't start with van or de, or end in -stra-sma-sema-ma,then you're a minority. Jobs are scarce and the closest thing to fame they have is that fuck who wrote American Pie and Mustard Plug. The Pie guy moved to Hollywood and MP is barely a band anymore. And the politics are hilarious, no need to invent a King and Queen: we have the DeVoses. Dick and Betsy. They do rule the city, no?
They certainly do. Great changes, my only objection was removal of my attempts to correlate Amway with pyramids... 'cause, you know... that's kind of what type of scheme it is, plus the actual article on Amway seems more critical (which, of course, is justified) than humorously satirical. --QuantumDriver 00:51, 5 August 2006 (UTC)
Correction: no, not critical, not satirical, mostly just random and stupid I guess. Maybe that's just me though. --QuantumDriver 00:52, 5 August 2006 (UTC)
- Ah! I missed this! The pyramids must be brought back. Reminds me of the pyramid building in the East, though, but isn't that a Steelcase office? (I will add the pyramids back! Great idea!)
edit December 2012
This article has deteriorated into listcruft and vanity. I'm cleaning it up. But first, deleting the following:
- "In response to the post below ... Oh My!!! What a rude and confused individual. You are obviously confused as to what and who a Dictator/Socialist is ... It is not the Devos Family or even the Van Andel Family. They are the two families most responsible for revitalizing Downtown Grand Rapids with their many many millions of Dollars in Donations!!! The Dictators/Socialists are the liberal Democrats that have tried their hardest to ruin the West Michigan area. PS. If you can't have an arguement without Calling Names, then maybe you should refrain from even talking." —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 188.8.131.52 (talk • contribs)
That went in two years ago and you "editors" haven't touched it. Listen, honey; that below isn't a "post" and this isn't a "blog," it's an encyclopedia article, or at least is supposed to look like one. And you aren't funny.02:36 16-Dec-12
Well, that was fun! There was so much to mine in the Wikipedia article--Newsweek declared G.R. a "dying city"--how ironic! It's a shame you guys spent so much time on what dorks your classmates are.
Now, I would appreciate if someone on-site would upload more illustrations, such as a bum-scape from Wealthy [sic] Street, or perhaps the drive-thru of the Adobe In-'N-Out, if it's still there.16:18 16-Dec-12
Also--anyone--What has Douglas Adams to do with Grand Rapids?14:05 29-Dec-12