From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
edit "Seriously, chill out on the rascism"
Dont be an asshole when you write this article, Todays Germans have no real connection to their mislead forefathers. Thats like saying all of America is rasicist because we used to do slavery....
edit "Be funny and not just stupid." Oscar Wilde on Germans
so sad all germany related articles are actually stupid and not funny. nothing against nazi jokes, but these articels contain no jokes and anyway is there really nothing else to say???
nooo, zere is nothing elze to zay, ve gerrrman are like zat!
edit New style
I've completely rewritten the article, they are now treated as if they are a different species. :-) Does it really matter? 14:16, 15 October 2006 (UTC)
This article is extremly racist, ur only accomplishing the survival of racism and hatred among people by having this shit stain of an article on this website. Like that saying Germans are 'like human', so your saying they're subhuman? Are you some sorta neo-nazi white guy that hates germans or something? I cannot see how you can put down the german people as a whole for something that happened 60 years ago that only a fraction of the people followed. It is just plain racist to put those remarks on here. Its alright if you make fun of some stuff, you can do that for all peoples, but to say they are subhuman is well beyond a practical joke. I cannot see how you are any better than Hitler himself.
- I have more football stickers than he ever had. -- Hindleyite 20:25, 23 October 2006 (UTC)
edit This isn't funny and I'm not laughing
Your blatant race hate here is not comical, it is not witty and I'm not fucking laughing. Just out of curiousity, I felt compelled to check out some of the other areas where there might be some controversy just to see if I'm being overly sensitive, because I rarely can't take a joke. For example, I laughed till I (nearly) peed myself reading the Germany article.
Nevertheless, as I half-expected, I discovered the "double standard" for other ethnicity/identity articles; my how carefully we've tiptoed around pages like Africa, Jew, various minority pages, even Poland, where there are still a laundry list of objections. Compare that to here where there are comments about inferiority, brain size, the language being like someone "vomitting" and other unoriginal and uncreative humor that has nothing to do with Germans per se. All of these comments are general insults that could be lobbed at any individual:
- "x have really small brains"
- "x are primates"
- "x's mothers have two vaginas(?) wtf?
- "x are uneducated"
- "x smell like urine"
Is it time for a snack and a nap yet? We're in kindergarten apparently. If I had to describe the creativity and level of intelligence put to use here, I'd make a comparison to the elementary "they're stupid, they smell funny" insults that date back to this era...and yet, there is no need for a comparison, because these are the exact ideas being put to use here. I'm speechless.--22.214.171.124 05:34, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
- Obviously you've not read enough insulting documents in the site, this is no anti-german, it's just...anti everything. What you could do is regsiter to the site and write a whole new piece (and not vandalizing this one) and all would be happy. Edits and remarks like this are usually not treated well when recieved from anonymous IPs. -- 09:22, 8 November 2006(UTC)
I'm aware of what this site is, and I'm also aware of its potential to be extremely entertaining. However, my concern is that your additions have little to do with the subject at hand. The point - reemphasized - is that your "jokes" can be spliced into any article: from the Spanish, to homosexuals to Mormons and so on. It still fits. You are simply taking a preclassified group, writing them off as inferior and simply expounding upon that condition of inferiority. Consequently, my edits were not vandalism; I removed the tasteless insults that do not pertain to the article. These regions were a violation of "be funny and not just stupid" principles.--126.96.36.199 20:48, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
None of this double standard shit. You aren't going to tell me what is an acceptable insult towards Germans, especially on behalf of a group that started screaming "antisemitism" when someone, heaven forbid, made fun of what their stereotypical meals were. Big difference between the two articles here. On another note, as a formerly conformed Wikipedian, I love the fact that I can curse on here as I deem necessary. Ja, fick dich, gleichfalls! --188.8.131.52 17:10, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
- First of all, it isn't my article. Second, take a look at Holocaust Tycoon and numerous other documents to see the extent that this site goes to insulting various groups. You can check niggers, Israel and dozens more. And until you're a regsitered user and start behaving in a more civilized way and not trying to impose your personal beliefs on the rest of us, I'll keep reverting your edits and eventually ask to ban you. Like I said: register, write a new one on your namespace, move it to the new namespace and all we'll be happy. You can also vote it for deletion if you'd like, of pose your opinion on the village dump, but like I said annoynomus IPs are not treated as registered users. Ciao. -- 20:16, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
- Yes, I agree with Mordillo. It's a wiki, which means that all sorts of people with a twisted/no no sense of humour can edit. This was probably written by a ten year old that thinks offensiveness is funny. -- Hindleyite 20:31, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
- Okay, the first thing I read on this was the talk, and I thought people were overreacting. When I read this article, I discovered they weren't. There a few funny bits, but mainly it's pretty tasteless. Honestly, I find offensive jokes hilarious. Several pages on this deovted to shock humour i thought were very funny. This isn't over the line, it's just not funny. There's a difference between making racial jokes and being stupid. Find some FUNNY racist jokes if you're going to use them. user: darkskul
- Excellent, create:user:darkskull/Germans write a new one, get the anon IP to help you, I can lay a hand as well, move it to the main space and win fame and glory. My only point being - don't assume don't you have a monopoly on bad humor. -- 20:43, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
Mordillo, you are missing the point. The article should not be Rfd'd and in fact, I would be sad to see it go. There are so many other directions we can probably go with the article, but the point is that I have eliminated what was of little value and the source of the problem. Sure, we can add to the article, but unfortunately I do not have the time to do this now. I'm not sure what your objection is to the fact that I'm writing this as an anon, and making a necessary edits so the article can, at least for now, stand as it is. By the way, I reworded a little of my last post because I was in the middle of editing it. Sorry if what you did read sounded confrontational in tone, but keep in mind that I thought you wrote the article. Sorry...and of course, Entschuldigung! --184.108.40.206 17:10, 8 November 2006 (UTC)
Hm, I agree... There are very funny articles about Germany and i have no problems laughing about them. But this one ain't funny... It's not because it's anti-german or anything, it's just crap, the jokes are crap, the pics are crap, nearly everything else is... yeah, you got it: crap! PS: No, i won't rewrite it or anything. I don't really know how to make it better but thats why I DON'T write such an article :D! --Soul Provider 16:49, 15 November 2006 (UTC)
I didn't think it was very funny either, so I tried to balance it out with some realistic perceptions and stereotypes that might add some humor. I didn't think the picture was very funny either, so I replaced it. One of those National Geographic-undercover-type things.--Waaahhh 00:11, 28 November 2006 (UTC)
Haha, whoever rewrote the page did a good job. I like the new wildlife take on it. Much better than the abysmal Americans page. Kudos.
edit Dieser Artikel ist ein hoffnungsloser Fall
I improved the quotes in the beginning, but overall this article really lacks any redeaming features... I mean, it really is ONLY insulting, unlike the article about Germany, which is rather funny.
- It is funny, just because you (as a group) are being made fun off doesn't mean it aint funny. What definately isn't funny is the nazi shit you added. What's funny about saying Germans have blond hair and blue eyes. Not only is it ridiculousd and not true, but really offending (to other peoples) as well.220.127.116.11 19:02, 30 May 2007 (UTC)
- I think it's damn funny, and I'm German myself, so I really don't see a problem with this article at all... I mean, shit, just look at all the woman articles... KeineLust90 17:12, 14 August 2007 (UTC)
edit Delete this article
I strongly suggest the deletion of this article since it doesen´t do anything but causing racistical debates.
Ladies and Gentleman, I want you to delete this articel or write it completely in a different way. At first: Bavarians don`t see theirselves as Germans, they want to be Bavarians. Second: Germany is not a big country of people who are screaming "Sieg Heil!" and "Jawohl, Mein Führer!" on each other, not even the election-placates of the NPD have got the slogan "Let`s loose anothe another World War!" an Pope Benedict XVI isn`t some kind of Sith-Lord or new Adolf Hitler. The Pope is a sometimes really stupid person and the showing of national-socialistic symbols - like Hackenkreuz-flags and SS-uniforms - are in Germany under very big punishes. Even the saying of so called "Nationalsozialistischem Gedankengut" is here under punishes. There are very much other stupid points in the articles over Germans, Germany and german traditions but not the completely webspace in the world could be enough to write it on this page. What we say here in Germany at this point if we very much offends and furiously on somebody are, is: "Halt`s Maul, Wixxer!" But I don`t want to go into vulgary language, so I say "Auf Wiedersehen!"
- The entire point of Uncyclopedia is to provide humor. Almost nothing on the site is true, and most of it is rude or insulting to particular people. I myself am from Bavaria, but I found the article hilarious. Jacjohncoles 19:46, 28 November 2008 (UTC)
- sadly without your ip we can not prove this right, please do not login if you want to state you are from Germany
edit Too many Nazi jokes
The "German = Nazi" joke has been done ad nauseum and it has become such a big clichee that it stopped being funny a long time ago. In fact, it's almost as unfunny now as the "American = Fat" joke. Hell, even the "Germans are not funny" clichee would be funnier than this!
I'm not saying that there shouldn't be ANY Nazi references in the article, but they should be a lot more subtle and closer to the truth. Simply inserting the phrase "Heil Hilter" everywhere you can is way TOO OBVIOUS to be funny.
It is sad that this article has become dominated by this crude clichee, because it has great potential to become a 5-star article. German culture has a lot of idiosyncrasies that can easily made fun of, (even Germans love being self-deprecating about their own culture), few of which seem to be addressed here.
And I'm not even saying that this article will offend most Germans. It probably won't. Most Germans are used these kind of clichees and they will just roll their eyes when they see this. But the only person who is likely to laugh at "JAWOHL MEIN FUEHRER" this is some immature xenophobic 14-year boy in Iowa. Chickeneer 10:46, 22 March 2008 (UTC)
edit I've re done it slightly
i.e taken out a lot of the unfunny Nazi statements- so boring yaaaawn- I agree just sticking JAWOHL and SIEG HEIL is NOT funny- only to a 12 year old brat I've also made it less "all over the place" what do you think??? As I'm not German I am unaware of a lot of the things that make the country humorous as it were e.g. parts of the culture you can have a laugh at (without offending) any suggestions?? Staringelf 22:12, 15 August 2008 (UTC)
Due to this article being completely stupid and just babbling on about nonsense that was neither creative nor funny, I have left somewhat of a framework for building the article from this point.--18.104.22.168 05:33, February 9, 2010 (UTC)
edit German tourists
The mystery of the glowing apparition of Our Lady of Fatima solved: A group of German sun-seeking tourists will do in any Portuguese village. 22.214.171.124 21:23, August 21, 2010 (UTC
- Thank you for your suggestion! When you feel an article needs fixin', please feel obligated to make whatever changes you feel are needed, (even though they'll probably be reverted 5 seconds later). Uncyclopedia is a wiki, so almost anyone can edit almost any article by almost simply following the edit link almost at the top. You don't even need to log in in most cases! (Although there are some reasons why you might like to...) The Uncyclopedia Cabal encourages you to be italic. Don't worry too much about making honest mistakes—they're likely to be found and corrected quickly, and your 6 month ban will fly by faster than you think. If you're not sure how editing works, check out proper wiki formatting, or use the sandbox to try out your vandalizing skills. DJ Mixerr 19:01, June 21, 2011 (UTC)
edit What the fuck is this shit?
This really goes to show how the Nazis and Hitler have given Germany a bad name.
edit highly clueless article
I have read that article now and it's very limited.
It obviously has been conceived by someone who's never been to Germany and simply tried to come up with stories fitting a selection of uninteresting stereotypes. Also the format is very exchangeable, depicting no originality at all.
Some pointers for improvement are:
- over-exaggeration of German cultural matters by most Germans
- special German wording like "Schweinehund" and the usage of umlauts "ä" "ö" "ü"
- technocracy and over-engineering
- social security system
- the odd partying behaviors
- the limited smalltalk in contrast to the major English speaking countries
- generally the stiffness in socio-emotional matters
- odd culinary like "Milbenkäse" and "Blutwurst"
- the Nazi elements require also Jew references and Neo-Nazi activities
- the bureaucracy should be pointed out too
- also "Wutbürger" references are missing
- to my knowledge Germans are the most pervy people around but are very very secretive about it.
currently the article is plainly stupid and requires a major work over
the rating on a scale from 1 to 5 is minus 3
yes thats right "das schlägt dem Fass den Boden aus"
btw.: i do not care if you take these pointers seriously, to me this website is useless and i hope operating it costs more than it earns. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 126.96.36.199 (talk • contribs)
- Except for the stereotype of the authors, these comments are actually helpful. But there is nothing so "useless" as offering an opinion and no edits, especially as you are obviously good with English. The average reader knows mostly stereotypes of Germany, so an article that amuses him will rely heavily on stereotypes. If you know about Blutwurst and the bureaucracy, you could write an article that is funny to you; but that would be of no use if it thereby lost its humor to others. Thank you for your best wishes; you have a nice life too. 10:09 13-Apr-13