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yo you suck gays are cool they should be everywhere... AS IN YO MOMSZ PAYUNTS
- What the fuck? --GAMESPOT=666 02:08, 1 February 2007 (UTC)
Just to let people know i am going to compleatly re-write this (even though it's in the medium re-write category) as i think i can do much better if i take it in a different direction. Have Fun! MuCal. Orian57|Chat|Chuckle|PEE List|Awarded|UnBlog| 14:48, 10 May 2008 (UTC)
edit Hangover from the old version of this article
I thought I'd keep this list of Arguments here just as some of them are verry funny but they're also very true and i couldn't really incorporate them in my version of the article. Here you go:
Arguments Against Gay Marriages Opponents of Gay Marriage say "no", often citing the following principles:
- Other countries that have legalized gay marriage, such as The Netherlands, Denmark, Canada, Spain, New Zealand, Mars and South Africa are clearly suffering God's wrath and social disintegration.
- The husband is always subservient to the wife or vice versa.
- Marriage is not meant to be enjoyed.
- Happy marriages are unholy.
- Marriage necessarily consists of three rings, namely the engagement ring, wedding ring and suffer-ring.
- The Bible says Adam should grieve, not have fun with Eve.
- Happy marriages might involve non-reproductive sex, thus denying women the warm, tickling sensation of childbirth.
- May lead to a gay divorce...
- Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
- Gay culture is a new fad created by the liberal media to undermine long-standing traditions. We know this is true because gay sex did not exist in ancient Greece and Rome.
- There are plenty of straight families looking to adopt, and every unwanted child already has a loving family. This is why foster care does not exist.
- Conservatives know best how to create strong families. That is why it is not true that Texas and Mississippi have the highest teen birthrates, and Massachusetts, Vermont, and New Hampshire have the lowest. This is a myth spread by the liberal media.
- Marriage is a religious institution, defined by churches. This is why atheists do not marry. Christians also never get a divorce.
- Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why our society has no single parents.
- Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
- Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
- Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
- Gay marriage should be decided by the people and their elected representatives, not the courts. The framers checked the courts, which represent mainstream public opinion, with legislatures created to protect the rights of minorities from the tyranny of the majority. Interference by courts in this matter is inappropriate, just as it has been every time the courts have tried to hold back legislatures pushing for civil rights.
- Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
- Civil unions, providing most of the same benefits as marriage with a different name are better, because "separate but equal" institutions are a good way to satisfy the demands of uppity minority groups.
- Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
- Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
- Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
- Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
edit Related userbox
I also made a userbox that relates to this article:
edit Needs to be expanded
There should definantly be some "arguments for" as well. Any other ways to expand it?