Talk:Gavin Newsom

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Since there are jokes about Gavin Newsom's hair on at least two other articles, he clearly needs his own article. I started with a serious article about him and added some jokes, but it still needs more. More allegations of heterosexuality might work; too much that's specific to SF or to his as-yet-unrealized national career probably won't be funny to people who live elsewhere. For the record, I actually like Newsom, even though I voted against him (hey, I really wanted a crazy radical spic troublemaker who would turn our city into a Soviet Republic, especially since I'd just moved here to LA where a well-connected smiling white Democrat had just beaten a crazy radical spic troublemaker who would turn our city into a Soviet Republic by appealing to moderates). Apparently 2/3 people who voted against him like him, not just me. Must be the hair. --Falcotron 23:50, 12 August 2006 (UTC)

edit Willie Brown

Uncyclopedia really needs a page on Willie. He's much funnier than Gavin. I'll try to come up with something, but if anyone else has any ideas, please go for it. In the meantime, I'll leave the red link here. --Falcotron 01:16, 13 August 2006 (UTC)

edit Hair

Can anyone find a better picture of his hair? The one I have on the page now doesn't really do it justice. --Falcotron 05:03, 13 August 2006 (UTC)

edit Scandal!!

You guys haven't put Newsom's one and only scandal in yet.

Scandal --- IN February 2007, the Mayor announced that he had an affair with Ruby Rippey-Tourk the wife of his "Best Friend" and Chief Whipping boy Alex Tourk.

The scandal revealed that while Newsom was having an affair with Ruby, his hair was having an affair with Alex.

Soon afterwards Alex Tourk resigned from his position under Newsom's hair, Ruby resigned from her position under Newsom. The Tourks have started intensive counceling, and have decided to remain together "...for the sake of the bank accounts."

After a trial separation, and intensive counceling Newsom and his hair decided to remain together "...for the sake of the City."

Kimberly Guilfoyle could not be reached for comment, but close friends say that she never trusted Newsom's hair.

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