||The jokes are a bit too obvious and lack subtlety. This isn't a bad idea for an article, but it needs a better structure and buildup. Gradually reveal disturbing things about the narrator rather than blatently saying them. Also avoid cliches like emos, they kill humour like poison.
||Not a bad idea but it needs work.
|Prose and formatting:
||The sentence structure needs improvement.
||The images are fine. The caption on the image representing hell was quite funny.
||Don't know what this is for.
||Overall its not a bad idea it just needs a more subtle approach.
||--Winstanley1 12:07, 28 April 2007 (UTC)