Syria

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Syria

National motto: We are one!
Official languages	Shami Arabic (we add "ay" at the end of each word; for example: Taboulay)
Capital	Damascus
Area  - Total	71,479.23432 km²
Population  - Total	28717 million (2008)[1]
Independence	From USA 12 March 2007   From Vichy France 17 July 1997

[edit] Syria

Syria, known to Jews and Isrealites as "our big buffer zone," is a country that is known to Americans only for its Humus. After recieving its independance from France, it vowed never to get in an international dispute ever again. This was tried when Isreal, in other words America, took land from Syria and called it a "buffer zone." Syrians tried to keep their cool, until Isreal did something really fucked up---they started building cities on their new "buffer zone". President Hafez Al-Assad summed up his anger and confusion in this extremely well known and many-times quoted speech:

"What the hell?"

After this, Syria and fed-up Egypt came together in what is known as the Syrian-Egyptian Ghoul Rush of 1973. The "winner" of this war is still disputed.

[edit] Government and Politics

Syrias government is based on an ingenious philosophy that Bashar Al-Assad calls, "shut up and we wont bother you." This means that, if the people of Syria dont comment badley about the President, you will be left alone. Therefore, no one knows what the other thinks about the government. This has been proven to be even more effective than communism.

[edit] Voting

The voting processs in Syria is extremely complicated. First, a man or woman enters a booth and checks off "yes" or "no" to decide if a candidate should become president. Then, a team of (COUGHCOUGH UNFAIR) workers make a few....minor adjustments (minor as in changing all "nos" to "yes"). Then, the votes are counted. For all the years in Syria, ALL the votes have been yes (I wonder why...?) And there you have it.

[edit] Economy

Most of Syrias imports are Quarans.

Exports: Hummus.

Thats all you need to know. I think Bashar is watching from my window...

[edit] Army

By heart, the Syrian Army is well, brave, and ready, but after the Soviet Union stoped giving them supplies, Syrias main weapon was mentos and diet coke mixed in a Fanta bottle. However, even under these surcumstanses, they were still able to size up to Isreal (in other words, 99% America, 1% Isreal.)

[edit] References

Countries and territories of Asia

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