Stating the bleedin' obvious

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Stating the bleedin' obvious is a strict scientific field which receives considerable funding from several public bodies, including ICHTUT, I Could have Told You That. The subject was founded in the late 17th century, when physicist Isaac Newton discovered that apples, among other things, fall towards the ground. Newton named this discovery 'Gravity', and everyone who was taking advantage of weightlessness soon fell to the ground.

This lead Newton into a new area of study, where he produced other seminal works including, 'Being hit on the head with a brick hurts even more' and On the sheer unexpected pain caused by paper-cuts. These were eventually collected in a quarto, and published under the name 'Principia Obviousa'. His critics suggested that this early work restricted 'Stating the bleedin' obvious' solely to the field of things that hurt, and subsequently work was expanded into more diverse concepts. It is these early rivals that gave us the now textbook cases of It's hot today isn't it, Excessive alcohol can make you do stupid things and Food has been proven to cause weight gain. Car crashes, obesity and sunstroke cases doubled after these discoveries.

Towards the end of the 20th century, Stephen Hawking expanded on Newton's works, with modern classics such as 'Space is big' and 'Black holes are dark'. Like Newton, many of his critics believed that his work was restricted solely to astrophysical theories, and would not expand out to wider topics. When Hawking tried to retort, he could not type fast enough, and was subsequently put aside as a 'fraud'. This led to a group of critics writing the controversial work Hawking can't talk'.

In the intervening years the field has expanded dramatically, and now attracts several million dollars in grant money each year. While the field has changed considerably, the core concepts laid down by Newton and other early researchers still stand. Landmark work published in March 2004 indicated that paper cuts still hurt, but further extended this study to show that more paper cuts hurt even more. Scientists are still researching the properties of lemon juice and their relationship with paper cuts, but the topic is quite sour.


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