Star Trek: The Original Series

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(2009 Parody Film)
(Doctor McCoy: Adding Bones is the only drug dealer allowed on the Enterprise, as Harlan Ellison would tell you. Romulan Ale and a hypospray of cordazine anyone?)
 
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{{Q|Who do you think is the better captain, Kirk or Kirk?|William Shatner|Patrick Stewart}}
 
{{Q|Who do you think is the better captain, Kirk or Kirk?|William Shatner|Patrick Stewart}}
   
A long long time ago, when men were men and women were women and Klingons were well to be perfectly honest - just basically men as well - '''Star Trek''' burst onto the screens of a grateful American nation.
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Also known as the Kirk, Spock and McCoy show, '''Star Trek: The Original Series''' (known just as '''Star Trek''' at the time) vowed to show humanity just how dehumanizing space exploration can be 300 years from now.
   
 
== Origin ==
 
== Origin ==
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Being a Vulcan, Spock apparently experiences a state known as the Pon Farr, but for reasons of some possible hormonal abnormality, seems to be trapped in it permanently. Though, he won’t talk about it... to anyone... at all. “Leave me alone! We do not discuss it with off-worlders.” Instead, he is obliged to sneak around demonstrating it, at every available opportunity, to almost any female who manages to avoid Captain Kirk. When not emerging from these well timed, romantic, musical interludes (generally, following a commercial) he spends much of his time: weeping, moping, throwing objects in rage, incensed with indignation, exploding in bouts of hysteria, sulking, laughing, crying, smirking, or smashing things in anger, when not murderously attempting to asphyxiate a close friend. Aside from this, he appears to have an amazing degree of control over his emotions.
 
Being a Vulcan, Spock apparently experiences a state known as the Pon Farr, but for reasons of some possible hormonal abnormality, seems to be trapped in it permanently. Though, he won’t talk about it... to anyone... at all. “Leave me alone! We do not discuss it with off-worlders.” Instead, he is obliged to sneak around demonstrating it, at every available opportunity, to almost any female who manages to avoid Captain Kirk. When not emerging from these well timed, romantic, musical interludes (generally, following a commercial) he spends much of his time: weeping, moping, throwing objects in rage, incensed with indignation, exploding in bouts of hysteria, sulking, laughing, crying, smirking, or smashing things in anger, when not murderously attempting to asphyxiate a close friend. Aside from this, he appears to have an amazing degree of control over his emotions.
   
Spock is the most beutiful liveform in the whole universe (that's a fact!)
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Spock is the most beautiful life form in the whole universe (that's a fact!)
   
 
=== Doctor McCoy ===
 
=== Doctor McCoy ===
   
Known as 'Bones' because of the fused and individual bones supported and supplemented by ligaments, tendons, muscles and [[cartilage]] that go into making up his skeleton, Bones has no medical knowledge whatsoever due to technological advances making such skills redundant. He simply follows instructions given to him by moving triangles on the wall of his sick-bay. His pronouncements of ''"He's dead Jim"'' given during away missions, are the guess of an amateur or prompted by some special hand held device. His primary duties are to loiter on the bridge, to lean on the railings, and to be an annoyance and impairment to command procedures.
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Known as 'Bones' because of the fused and individual bones supported and supplemented by ligaments, tendons, muscles and [[cartilage]] that go into making up his skeleton, Bones has no medical knowledge whatsoever due to technological advances making such skills redundant. He simply follows instructions given to him by moving triangles on the wall of his sick-bay. His pronouncements of ''"He's dead Jim"'' given during away missions, are the guess of an amateur or prompted by some special hand held device. His primary duties are to loiter on the bridge, to lean on the railings, and to be an annoyance and impairment to command procedures. He is the only drug dealer allowed on the Enterprise.
   
 
[[Image:Scotty solitary.jpg|thumb|right|150px|Doohan's two-week spell in solitary confinement proved an extra headache for script-writers.]]
 
[[Image:Scotty solitary.jpg|thumb|right|150px|Doohan's two-week spell in solitary confinement proved an extra headache for script-writers.]]
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=== Foreigners ===
 
=== Foreigners ===
 
[[Image:Uhura1.jpg|120px|left|thumb|Lt. Uhura]]
 
[[Image:Uhura1.jpg|120px|left|thumb|Lt. Uhura]]
Renowned racist Roddenberry insisted on having ethnic minorities in the Star Trek crew so as to give them nothing of any use to do, thus reinforcing the stereotype of lazy foreigners. So underused were the characters of Sulu and Chechov, they were both replaced by mannequins in the third-series. The only line they would ever utter in this final year was the pre-recorded 'Aye Aye Captain'.
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[[Image:Sulu spinoff.jpg|thumb|Still from rejected 1970 Trek spinoff pilot, deemed "ill-conceived" by NBC.]]
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Renowned racist Roddenberry insisted on having ethnic minorities in the Star Trek crew so as to give them nothing of any use to do, thus reinforcing the stereotype of lazy foreigners. So underused were the characters of Sulu and Chekov, they were both replaced by mannequins in the third-series. The only line they would ever utter in this final year was the pre-recorded 'Aye Aye Captain'.
   
Nichelle Nichols broke ground by being the first actress to appear in a sci-fi series with a 'disconnected ear'. Nichelle's right ear was chopped of in a bread slicing accident weeks before filming commenced; this forced her to play the part of Uhura whilst continuously holding her ear in position allowing her to hear her colleague's lines. Unfortunately this meant she was recast from her intended role of futuristic African sex slave to that of Telephone Operator.
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Nichelle Nichols broke ground by being the first actress to appear in a sci-fi series with a 'disconnected ear'. Nichelle's right ear was chopped of in a bread-slicing accident weeks before filming commenced; this forced her to play the part of Uhura whilst continuously holding her ear in position allowing her to hear her colleague's lines. Unfortunately, this meant she was recast from her intended role of futuristic African sex slave to that of Telephone Operator.
   
 
[[Image:Star execution.jpg|thumb|right|140px|1960's serial killers 'The Tennessee Two' are executed by robot probe Nomad.]]
 
[[Image:Star execution.jpg|thumb|right|140px|1960's serial killers 'The Tennessee Two' are executed by robot probe Nomad.]]

Latest revision as of 02:54, November 15, 2014

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