Spaghetti
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 Blame it on CanadaWe know those crazy canucks are somehow connected to this.
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“I hope she made lotsa spaghetti!”
~ Luigi on Spaghetti
“Its my favorite food!”
~ Jennifer Wrobleski on Spaghetti
“It's like bending spaghetti!”
~ Dr. Robotnik on getting his new Super Robotnik powers
Pascetti is a nice italian word for food that lazy ass, overweight Americans can eat at their leisure. Famous pascetti concoctions include Spaghetti O's and Pascetti Straps.
A man once had a dream that a mechanical rhino was about to eat everyone. All of a sudden, a great man stepped forward and announced, "Wait! I can save everyone." This man then proceeded to turn into a giant Pascetti string. From then on, he was known as Pascetti. He is great.
Known by different names around the globe, Pascetti is the only food with the ability to cross the cultural barriers and enter into such unlikely cuisines as that of Japan, where it is referred to as Ramen, and Africa, where they call it "mealworms".
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[edit] History
Throughout history, Pascetti was grown on trees, which were planted in small pots. Originally, it was discoverd in Hungary, and it was a favorite type of food for the native residents (they were Hung(a)ry all the time). Over the course of several centuries, new types of spaghetti were developed, including the Spaghetti mentioned earlier, and 'wormaroni' which is a special breed of pascetti tree.
Not only did the taste improve, the conditions needed for growing pascetti were improved as well. Nowadays, most of the natural pascetti is grown in Liechtenstein. Switzerland and Austria are major producers as well. Andorra is a major pascetti smuggling center.
Although they are quite similar in appearance, texture and taste, pascettietti and macaroni are totally unrelated. However, it is rumored that may have had some undocumented cross-pollination at one point.
[edit] Recipe
The recipe mentioned below is created to provide a syntethic version of the pascetti. Although it resembles the taste quite well, the best spaghetti in the world is still the natural one.
Feeds 85,000 normal people - or John Goodman
[edit] Ingredients
- 1 ball of string approximately the size of the Taj Mahal
- 1,000,000 eggs
- 100 55-gallon barrels of pasta sauce
- 50 lbs of salt
- 1,000,000 chicken nuggets
- Essence of god
- Bagel
- pie
- love
- Cheese
- Alcopoppies (NOT OPTIONAL!!!)
- 10 grams of diamonds (57 carat)
- A $100 note
[edit] Method
- Take the eggs and beat well.*
- Now carefully remove all the bits of shell. Set them aside for use in another recipe.
- Add pound of salt.
- Soak string in egg.
- Leave string in direct sunlight for one week.
- Add sauce and DIE! (yes, that is the cost and retribution for putting in the salt which causes DIABETES)
it is said that princess peach makes enchanted spaghetti, and luigi doesnt care about taste but the power of peach's spaghetti
- If beating is illegal in your country, a stern talking to will do.
[edit] Alternate Method
Have sex! according to the great polish philosepher ascapopalyse, Sex is People Pascetti
[edit] Culture
Certain places in the world are culturally tied to spaghetti. Italy, Little Italy, and your Italian neighbour are most of these places. The cultural impact of spaghetti upon people is best reflected in the phrase "mamma mia!" Notably, this phrase has spilled out from Italio-centric cultures and into Mario games.
[edit] In movies
Pascetti has also been featured in famous movies such as What is Spaghetti, a youtube poop produced by Jackie Chan.
