Software

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“Any wit in a storm... on the other hand, I'll take two halfwits in satin software.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Software
Computer software, or just Software, is a collection of fuzzy logic, often zeros and ones, that when viewed at precisely the right angle create the illusion of velvet undergarments.

Software has been rising in popularity in recent years, due to the amazing number of things it is capable of doing. In olden days, (pre 1527) software had a reputation for ceasing to work. This was called a hard wedgie. However, due to recent advances in nonotechnology, this no longer happens. Instead, software actually becomes softer as it approaches the limits of its capabilities.

Currently, no software in the world has crashed in over ten years. It is speculated that the only possible way to crash software now is a worldwide calamity, on the order of an asteroid collision, or large-scale nuclear explosion.

Many software creators have moved to India where they find cheap cotton fabrics like madras and percale which they 'code' into inexpensive software.

Fortunately Oscar had friends who were skilled at hand coding and always had a plenteous supply of software.

An even more fuzzy type of software is "Shareware". Its commonly found in fleemarkets where people share their old clothes they dont need anymore for a penny or a dime. Another type of shareware is say that the above words amuse you. If the words were shareware, you could give me money, but only if you want to, to my e-gold account nr. 491192. If I could double that money in a year by sharing it with different investors, I would give you back 150% of what On wheels! you gave me a year earlier. Alternatively I can pray for your near and dear so that they will have a better life, both this and the next one. Now dont ask for your uncle to become my grandson in next life, that would be unforgivable. If that is not Shareware, then what is???  ;-)

Software programs that work or ones that appear to work

The software listed below has a 0.1010% chance of working properly, however if it doesn't, it will turn into a huge monster and eat your computer which has been running for 0.01101 hours.

  • Firefox The browser so lame it needs a web site of supporters to spread it and force people to use it.
  • Internet Explorer Supposively surfs the net with the best security.

Software programs that halt

See also

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