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I'm known as Mr.X and you didn't hear it from me, but Webster's Dictionary defines Informant as, "a person who gives information to another." But not me. I'm just a... consultant. Yeah, that's right.
Informants are snitches, really. They'd tell you stuff, like, "I heard some guy down by the dock is selling cats for huffing. They say he's workin' for that 'higher up' you was talkin' 'bout." Also, they would mention it was Dock 5. You'll see it, it's by crane lookin' thing. But you didn't hear it from me...
edit History of Informants
I heard some greasy cat started this whole informant biz a time ago. You didn't hear it from me, but it was a honkey who snitched on the proud brothas of the Underground Railroad. Then, I heard that the term 'informant' was officially coined by the police for th-
POLICE?! Oh, false alarm. Anyways, these informant cats would let the cops know what kind of bad things are goin' down. For a price, of course. Speaking of which, I think you owe me a little something before we go further. You know, we, uh, had a bet?
edit Famous Informants
You didn't hear this from me, but these cats have been known to know things others don't know... ya know?
- 50 Cent: Snitched on Murder Inc. after a confrontation that led to his stabbing.
- Oscar Wilde: This cat had all the good "quotes"... but they were just a cover for some 'insider info' he picked up. Cause, you know... he's gay and all that stuff.
- Mr. T: Outta the whole A-Team, they always picked the black cat to do the deep cover jobs! Crackas. But at least the T Man picked up some good info once in a while.
- Your Mom: Mmmm, yeah! One fine, foxxxy lady! With all the cats she got down with, she was bound to hear a few tidbits from her clients. Hell, I know she made me talk reeeaaal quick like! Oh yeah...
- Chuck Norris: Out of all the cliches in this list, this one holds more truth than any other. This cat beat the ever-lovin' crap outta you until he got what he needed to know! You didn't hear it from me, though... seriously, don't let him find out I told you.
- Snow: In exchange for a licky boom boom down, he admitted that he was a black Jamaican trapped in a white kid from Toronto.
- Who else, who else... oh yeah! I'm an informant of sorts, you know. But that ain't written in stone, so keep your lips tight, brotha.
edit Noticeable Traits
- Use of word 'cat' as a title for men
- Use of phrase 'foxxxy lady' as a title for women
- Starting every tip with the sentence, "You didn't hear it from me, but..."
- Dresses like a pimp