Shot your fuck up

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Donkey
Drug Mules are often utilised to transport "Death Powder" throughout Europe.
“Anyone know the Polish word for "Satire"?”
~ Noel Coward on Shot Your Fuck Up
“No, you Shot Your Fuck Up”
~ Oscar Wilde on Shot Your Fuck Up

Shot your fuck up, or SYFU is a popular Eastern European method for injecting drugs, particularly heroin, directly into the soft tissue of the genitals. The practice is illegal in many countries outside of Poland, though is becoming increasingly popular amongst the European Porn Industry, based in Prague.

edit Drug Baron

Ermey
Shut the fuck up or I will skull-fuck you!

Known as the "Polish Coke", recent unconfirmed speculation has been that Father Director Teddy Rydzyk has been flooding the market of neighbouring countries, particularly Glaswegia and Norwegia with branded parcels, stamped with the term "Warsaw Packed". This has made people in Britain snigger.

The primary source of Polish Coke is thought to be the You Son of A Bitches Gang, Poland's biggest crime syndicate. They are thought to be expanding their activities into Russia and several South American nations, including Cuba.

edit Tools

You will need the following items to participate: (consult MacGyver for help)

  • A kilo of Crack Cocaine/Heroin/Ground Kitten souls
  • Pair of Pliers
  • A Spoon
  • Industrial strength Rubber gloves
  • Blowtorch
  • Rusty syringe
  • Genitals

Optional Equipment:

edit Just Say Yes

DramaticQuestionMark
Did you know...
Drugs account for nearly 78% of all drug-related crime worldwide?

As with the use of other narcotics it is known that the sensations associated with prolonged use is akin to the similtaneous slamming of both the subjects head and genitals in a fridge door. There is also a lingering taste of almonds. A number of International Governmental Agencies are actively seeking to bring a halt to the practice with varying degrees of success.

edit See also

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