Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/September 10
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September 10: Kumquat Kicking Festival (Pakistan), International Hypocrisy Day
- Before Time BC - Death is born in a small town in Kansas, Nascar becomes marginally interesting.
- 541 BC - Greek philosopher Hypocrites invents hypocrisy
- 540 BC - Hypocrisy condemned as immoral by Hypocrites
- 30 - Asked whether one should pay taxes, Jesus says, "Give unto Caesar what is Caesar's", but then cheats on his income tax.
- 1092 - Tap dancing invented.
- 1093 - Inventor of Tap Dancing shot in the head.
- 1640 - The world's first slide rule goes on display in Paris. Rioting ensues.
- 1892 - Oscar Wilde arrives in America, claiming at customs "I have nothing to declare but my genius". Actually he's got some fruit and Cuban cigars.
- 1897 - Lattimer Massacre - a sheriff's posse kills twenty unarmed immigrant miners in Pennsylvania. Up until the massacre, the mine wasn't very productive.
- 1913 - First fully-carpeted coast-to-coast ferret-run opened in the USA.
- 1939 - Canada declares war on Nazi Germany; German army takes the afternoon off.
- 1960 - American baseball player Mickey Mantle kicks a kumquat an estimated 643 feet.
- 1967 - Supreme Court hands down landmark decision in Pot v. Kettle which legalizes hypocrisy.
- 1982 - The following people are born: (2,394 James), (9887 Johns), (1 satayanarayan ranganathan rama appuswami ganapathy).
- 2000 - Millions board planes with shoes, liquids, and food. Angered by this, George Bush goes into seclusion to come up with a way to stop this. It takes roughly one year and a few phone calls to his friends in the Middle East.
- 2001 - Billions and billions of Americans go to bed early in order to be well-rested for the September 11 terrorist attacks the next day.
- 2008 - The Large Hadron Collider is switched on ... nothing happens ... Swiss scientists decide to cut their losses and turn it into a badass thrill ride
- 2012 - The Large Hadron Collider Thrill Ride turns into a supermassive black hole and turns the Earth into something the size of a small pea
