Saskatchewan

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Eh?
Semi-Socialist Republic of Saskatchewan
Saskatchewan
(Flag) (Coat of Arms)
Motto: "So nice, you're welcome to say it twice!"
Anthem: "Theme to the March of the Imperial Stormtrooper"

(Love child of Joni Mitchell and Gordie Howe making a mess of Sasquatchewan)
Capital Regina (moving to Saskatoon)
Largest city River Landing, Saskatoon
Official languages Canuck
Government Plutocracy
 Wheat King of Saskatchewan  Dief the Chief
National Hero(es) Brent Leroy, Gordie Howe, [1] Joni Mitchell, [2] Leslie Nielsen, [3] Jim Stiglitz [4] Dick Assman, Benito Mussolini, Tommy Douglas's hair, That geezer with the green hat
Declaration
Currency Saskatchewan Ruble
Religion New Democratic
For those without comedic tastes, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about Saskatchewan.

“Wha wha whee wha!!!”

~ Borat Fark Sagdiyev on Saskatchewan

“The only place where you can lose your dog, and watch it run away for 4 days.”

~ Local on Saskatchewan

“Actually its just a rectangle in the middle of Canada”

~ The atlas on Saskatchewan

“In Soviet Russia, wheat harvests you!”

~ Russian Reversal on Saskatchewan

Sasquatchewan, or Semi-Socialist Republic of Saskatchewan, is the mecca to which all Sasquatch children aspire. The saskatchewaneese are known for their hostility towards the rest of Canada. After the Russian invasions and swine flue outbreak, the Saskatchewaneese renamed their partially soverign state United Hoser Farmer Society. Their mothers tell them stories with the wonders of Sasquatchewan and there are television shows about it. The good Sasquatches also attend special lessons on the weekend mornings, to learn the exact dance steps they need to enter Sasquatchewan and wear their Lemur skin coats.

Contents

[edit] Quick Saskatchewan Facts

  1. Saskatchewan is not to be confused with Saskatchewan.
  2. Saskatchewan is not to be confused with Sasquatchewan.
  3. Saskatchewan is not to be confused with Alberta.
  4. Saskatchewan is several times the size of England, but England's population is 40 times as much as Saskatchewan's.
  5. Saskatchewan was the world's first communist state.
  6. Lather, rinse, repeat (if desired).
  7. There is a growing number of Canadians who don't believe in the existance of Saskatchewan and think it is just a figment of Manitoba's imagination.

[edit] Famous Towns in Saskatchewan

Saskatchewan is as the map depicts it, rectangular and flat.

[edit] History

Lorne Calvert, the greatest premier of Saskatchewan. even though his regime ended rather upsetingly in 2007, even his sworn enemies still bow down to his greatness.

Saskatchewan was united with Alberta in one super province called Buffalo from 1882 to 1904 when the Communist party won elections in Regina. the people on the Alberta side of Buffalo didn't want to be Communist. So on September 1, 1905, The boundaries were made and the Semi-Socialist Republic of Saskatchewan (SSRS) was formed. Unlike other Communist states, the SSRS based its economy on Farming, and thanks to abundant supply of Potash, SSRS became the World's largest supplier of Grain, in the 1928 harvest, the premier said that his province produced so much grain, that if it was all set in a pile, the top of the pile would reach Space. Thus starting the Space Race. Lorne Calvert, the last premier of SSRS, ruled his province so well, the new Sask. Party government kept his face on the Rubles.

[edit] Current Eh?vents

A typical Saskatchewaneese luxury car.

Sasquatchewan is known today mostly for its CFL team, the Saskatchewan Roughriders , and as the birthplace of Chris Real, instead of its marijuana grow ops. In at least 10 meetings annually, football sufferers hobble around Regina looking for pot while a 10 foot tall gopher urges the crowd to chant obscenities at the visiting footballers.

In moments of climax, Sasquatch children dart out among the afflicted without their green lemur skin coats and try to evade the authorities who are there to protect the footballers.

Most recently, a single mammal, who claimed to be the king of them all acquired his own internet. His first reaction was "I'm going to post on /b/ how our own team sucks.". Soon, a few more received internet, and now these elites spend their time looking at furry porn, because of the rarity of actual Saskatchewan people in porn.

As of late, a rise of pirates who steal wheat, barley and all the other grains has been noted. A mountie known as "Spongebob" has been seen to ride with them, but during the winter months these pirates hang around New Mexico.

[edit] Footnotes

  1. ↑ Got his name because he was a know-it-all and people would ask "Gordie, How?"
  2. ↑ Wife of guitarist extraordinare Kim Mitchell.
  3. ↑ Founder of the Nielsen TV ratings system.
  4. ↑ Inventor of such useful items as existence and poutine.
  5. ↑ *spit*
  6. ↑ Which does not have any water.
  7. ↑ Which is very far from being a surprise.
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