Uncyclopedia:Sandbox
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Trains can't swim. Even if they think they can.
Little Kid's Books We'd Like to See:
'You Were An Accident' 'Strangers Have the Best Candy' 'The Little Sissy Who Snitched' 'Some Kittens Can Fly!' 'The Protocols of the Grandpas of Zion' 'How to Dress Sexy for Grownups' 'Getting More Chocolate on Your Face' 'Where Would You Like to Be Buried?' 'Katy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her' 'The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!' 'All Dogs Go to Hell' 'The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking' 'When Mommy and Daddy Don't Know the Answer They Say God Did It' 'Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia' 'What Is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?' 'Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?' 'Bi-Curious George' 'Daddy Drinks Because You Cry' 'Mister Policeman Eats His Service Revolver' 'You Are Different and That's Bad' 'Why God Burned Down Disney Land'
The wise man washes his hands after going to the bathroom. The wiser man never goes to the bathroom on his hands
Welcome to the internet; no thinking required.
People need to know that no one cares about them.
Small problem? Small hammer. Big problem? Big hammer. The world aint' all that complicated...
hedonophobia: fear of feeling pleasure
Trichopathophobia - Fear of hair.
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.
Anatidaephobia: The fear that somehow, somewhere, a duck is watching you.
Master I do want to become a Jedi, and I do respect tradition. It’s just; can you please call me G-Dog when were in the presence of the princess.
If puns were deli meat, this would be the wurst.
I've never made a mistake before; once I thought I did, but I was wrong.
You can tell a lot about a person... by going through their wallet.
Better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick!
Apon the invention of the internet, the Earth was propeled by English teachers rolling over in their graves.
Every 33 feet of salt water increases the pressure by another 14.7 psi (sea level) thereby compressing it by 1/2. So a belch released at 330 feet would be large enough to capsize a boat by the time it got to the surface. That sounds like fun.
You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
Teach a man to build a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
Meow!Thump!Meow!Thump!Meow!Thump! "You're right! There isn't enough room to swing a cat in here!"
Help me! everytime I blink; the world dissapears!
I'm not corrupt, I'm morally flexible
"I see," said the blind mand as he pissed into the wind, "It is all comming back to me." I am beginning to realise that the best minds in the world cannot help me if I remove them from their skulls.
I hate Lucky Charms. Marshmellows are NOT supposed to crunch.
ProTip: Never take sleeping pills and laxatives the same night.
Children's books that never made it: 1. You Are Different and That's Bad 2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables 3. Dad's New Wife Robert 4. Fun Four-letter Words to Know and Share 5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do Book 6. The Kid's Guide to Hitchhiking 7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her 8. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence 9. All Cats go to Hell 10. The Little Sissy Who Snitched 11. Some Kittens Can Fly 12. That's it, I'm Putting You up for Adoption 13. Grandpa Gets a Casket 14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator 15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia 16. The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy 17. Strangers Have the Best Candy 18. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way 19. You Were an Accident 20. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will 21. Pop! Goes the Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games 22. The Man in the Moon is Actually Satan 23. Your Nightmares Are Real 24. Where Would You Like to be Buried? 25. Eggs, Toilet Paper and Your School 26. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Mrs. Electrical Outlet be Friends? 27. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things 28. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
Some people are like slinkies. Generally useless, but you still can't help but chuckle when you see one of them tumbling down the stairs.
Clothes are the lowest priority for an engineer, assuming the basic thresholds for temperature and decency have been satisfied. If no appendages are freezing or sticking together, and if no genitalia or mammary glands are swinging around in plain view, then the objective of clothing has been met. Anything else is a waste.
"It has been theorized that an infinite number of monkeys banging on an infinite number of typewriters would eventually reproduce the written works of Shakespeare. Thanks to the Internet, we now know this is not true." ~Kurt Vonnegut
I need to put this somewhere that people WILL read it; meh I'm good.
Fat. You people are extremely fat. It is 3:58 AM in MD and i am bored right now. You can go be fat. I am going to go saw 4 on all of you. K BYE
lol
- DBD WAS HERE***
- DBD***
| Hey, Sandbox, welcome to Uncyclopedia! | ||
[edit] Welcome!Hello, Sandbox, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for people like you:
If you read anything at all, make it the above three links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:
I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button ( If you want to write and don't know where to begin, consider contributing to Uncyclopedia's current colonization of the week, a group writing project to improve a single popular article. Anyone is welcome to contribute, so come help out! If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in! Also, if you happen to know anyone who is Singaporean, tell me. I currently have a project going on and anyone is welcome to join, and help. Also, if you're feeling tired or something, just visit MyBrute for relaxtion! It's a fun game! If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. Again, welcome! | ||
Now, being less formal, you will see the above message in a lot of users' talk page. However, that does not mean this is an automated message. Really, I had to click on your user talk, copy-paste this stuff, and submit it with my own fleshy finger. I'm not a bot. I exist. Now, for some "personal", "non-official" advice:
- You may think some stuff that appears everywhere here is cool, like Oscar Wilde, Chuck Norris, Kitten Huffing, Russian Reversal, and Mr. T. Those things are completely overused and not really funny anymore. Among us sophisticated intelligentsia, we call this phenomenon cliché. Whatever, these subjects are worn out, near death, and in dire need of being huffed. Just please don't mention them unless you have a very, very good reason. Or if it's funny. And I mean funny.
- Another thing we veterans hate is Random Humor. Don't put chicken from Mars in an article about George Washington. You can put it in an article about, well, Chicken from Mars. That's it.
- Humor is a subtle subject. People will tell you that talking about excretes is just bad taste - count me among them - and others will find this kind of stuff the
pinnacle of subversive irony. Just stay calm, have a good look at HTBFANJS, and try to learn what works best. No one here will ban you as long as you don't impose your non-conformist ideas on already created stuff. - Start pages in userspace, first. By that, I mean if you wanted to create a page called "Flappy woo-ha," instead of creating the page Flappy woo-ha, create User:Sandbox/Flappy woo-ha. That way, you'll have plenty of time to work on it and it won't be deleted or ICU'd. You can start a page in mainspace, just make damn sure what you put there is long enough and funny enough to not get huffed.
- Never recreate a deleted article. Never redo a reverted edit. Never.
- There are a lot of links I just put on your page. This is the most important one. HTBFANJS is important, but the mybrute link is better.
- You can steal templates and welcome people, but don't forget to but the subst: inside the template. Like {{subst:Welcome}}. I used User:Zheliel/welcome. A lot better, it includes these fun linkies.
- And, finally, don't be afraid. We don't eat people. Usually.
| Member of the Order of Uncyclopedia This person has successfully registered on Uncyclopedia. They should be proud of themselves for making such a smart move. |
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