Rubbish

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A box of Rubbish™.

A woman made entirely of rubbish

“This article is rubbish”

~ Captain Obvious on this article

Rubbish™ is a breakfast cereal manufactured by Post, it is fortified with iron, non-essential vitamins (Q,T,W, and §), DDT, nicotine, and badgers. Eat a bowl of Rubbish™ every day to get your daily requirement of hemp fibre. Rubbish™ is made predominantly from rice, and other waste products from Asian households. It comes in boxes, bins and bags. It is also famous for its alliteration.

[edit] Rubbish™ Facts

get it, rubbish? Ah-hahaha...

• It is crunchy and sweet.
• It never goes soggy in milk.
• In fact, it changes the milk green.
• There is a toy in the bottom of each box (Note: the toy constitutes the iron content of Rubbish™).
• Rubbish™ would have saved the life of John F. Kennedy had he been fed the cereal after his assassination.
• The self-adhesive poperties of Rubbish™ inspired Nicola Tesla to invent the electric toothbrush
• It can cure cancer.
• Shoddy tribute band Two Humps are rubbish.
• It can translate Cyrillics into Hellenistic Greek.
• It can make you the most famous surreal artist ever.
• Its Just That GOOD!!
• It recorded a CD in 1990 that went quintuple platinum.
• It can make all of your dreams come true.
• Don Henley wrote "The Boys of Summer" about Rubbish™.
• It is always punctual.
• Makes a good cement when wet.
• It is a good dancer.
• It was the voice of Aladdin.
• It rescued Mongolia once from an invasion of ninjas, then it took over Mongolia.
• It was on the list of prohibited substances at the 2006 Winter Olympics
• It was the forth original Blue Man until it was fired for failing to catch a marshmallow that was thrown at it.
• It was the actual cause of the French Revolution.
• It can be used as a substitute for solid state rocket fuel.
• It is the only useful thing that has no use whatsoever.

[edit] Synonyms

• Garbage
• My homework
• Books
• You
• Taxes
• The President
• Religion
• Bob Dole
• Your face
• Women
• Men
• Cars
• Video Games
• School
• Work
• Sports
• Porn
• Your mother
• Air
• All countries (Mainly America)
• America
• Wikipedia
• Communism
• Capitalism
• Junk
• Trash
• Thrash