Today's Featured Article
Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced.
and Todd "Howlin'" Lyons worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Some "Fingers" User .
Tomb of the Unknown Contributor
A minute's deletion is to be observed.
On this day...
National Day in November 26: the Republic of Bulimia, International Abstinence Rejection Day.
1528 - Rabbits, who were for so long the world's dominant species, become stupid and incompetent by staring out to sea to look for their carrots
1622 - Tony Blair rejects the invention of a sandwich. Fish and chips are hereby the 'standard' lunch item for schoolboys. Oscar Wilde moonwalks at a nightclub in Moscow. Michael Jackson boards an aeroplane as soon as word reaches the Neverland ranch.
1989 - Year 1989 gets lost in history and cunningly disguises itself as the year 1789. No success yet recorded
1800 - Something vaguely interesting probably happened today, but we don't give a fuck.
1818 - The Republic of Bulimia declares its independence from Spain.
1971 - Jim Morrison dies a virgin.
1984 - Rumors flare that Irish band U2 actually originate from Eurasia. Fans rebel, labelling them doubleplusgood.
1999 - Chastity belts are outlawed and replaced with Chastity lasers.
2010 - It all ended (more or less - although to be honest, it's really more less than more).
2013 - Tragic death of Lurgan (Northern Ireland) celebrity Willy the Tramp after an overdose of Buckfast
2090 - The last Christian dies due to practising abstinence.
2100 - The Republic of Bulimia mysteriously disappears. David Blaine denies involvement due to being dead.
Word of the Day
Death Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power.
In the news
writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much).
Oscar Wilde of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint Editors -human hybrid to manage Recent News.
earwig was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died.
Jesus people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there...
Gothic The commit mass suicide, but emos nobody cares...duh...
Mourners flow through the streets of in New York fashion, melodramatic demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots.
All are wearing black armbands.
Uncyclopedians The are comitting mass seppuku.
Japanese The are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In British France, rioting ensues.
Physicists at publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed.
IITb The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives.
All the are drunk. All the Russians are Dutch . Peyote use at an alarming high among stoned .
Native Americans In the the streets are full of women wailing loudly.
middle east The have organised a drive through service.
a duh /b/ was here
If anyone cares on a day like today...
*...that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
...that wearing a Top Hat is not only a sound fashion choice, it gives you somewhere to hide candy?
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