Rome
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Rome (nickname: that infernal city) is a city located on a boot somewhere in Romania and is famed for its three major exports, namely meatballs, ancient-world imperialism and the Super Mario Brothers.
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[edit] Ancient Rome
[edit] The Founding of Rome
Also known for the imense amount of rumanian immigrants. Rome, contrary to Popular Belief, was in fact built in a day by two when they were doing nothing and making people do there dirty work, such as preparing famous spanish dishes, like "stir fried pig bollcosm on a plate of sauce". Naturalist brothers named Romulan and Uncle Remus. Romulan in between work shifts fathered the Romulan tribe, which later went on to trouble Captain Kirk, and the Roma. Uncle Remus did most of the work.
Romulan and Uncle Remus' parents had had both been trampled to death by a herd of large, Carthaginian elephants. Rome, like the proverbial elephants of fate, never forgot this affront to their Founding Fathers and expressed its outrage by being trampled to death by Hannibal and his herd of large, Carthaginian rapist elephants nearly 500 years later. Thus having no home the infants Romulan and Uncle Remus were adopted by a she-wolf as part of an orphan relocation program. This in turn somehow resulted in a genocide of fauns and girls named Flora which served to inspire a popular Roman childrens' show called Koliseum Kidz.
The brothers rebelled in their teens in protest to having been subjected to emu music in their pimple-soprano years while the she-wolf was out stealing and pawning babies for a living. Their subsequent conversions, Romulan to Fascism and Uncle Remus to Shinto, put them at odds with their friend Mowgli. The solved by Mowgli's death at the hands of Jimmy Stewart, then a Polynesian headhunter.
Romulan and Uncle Remus left home, also several legal battles, and decided to found their own city. However, this led to tragedy. The two brothers had sex with men during dispute over naming their settlement. Uncle Remus wanted it to be called "B'rer Rabbit's Cajun Zydaco Steakhouse" whereas Romulan favored "New Delhi". An epic battle took place in which Uncle Remus attempted to pull a Double-Gladiator-Lion Smackdown on Romulan to which Romulan himself replied with a Triple-Testudo-Centurian Belly-Bump Supreme. Romulan won and in a fit of pride named the fledgling city after himself thus beginning Rome.
Many cities today share some form of likeness with retarded oldisy Rome. well, it wasn't always old, was it? Like Washington, D.C., for example. In ancient Rome, which was build on 7 hills ( the 7th hill ), Capitol hill, was used to build a prison. Washington, D.C.'s Capitol hill is used now a days to harbor politicians. The likeness is almost uncanny. Some have noted that Istanbul, the famous turkey city, is built on seven hills but historians have pointed out that that doesn't count as it was deliberate.
[edit] The Roman Empire and Pants (Or No Pants)
Main article: Roman Empire Once they had a city built, the next thing the Romans decided to build was an Empire. Not having much creativity in thinking up names, they called it "the Roman Empire".
During the Imperial era, the Spartan army sent constant air raids on Rome. Rome answered back by dropping atom bombs on Greek cities Hiroshima and Nagasakimagishowashinakano. Sparta answered back by inventing the "britzkrieg" strategy (known as blitzkrieg to the Germans).
- Aided in the Pirate-Ninja War
- Star Wars
- NCAA Tournament Final Four (Lost to Syracuse)
- War of 1812 + 2
- War of the Worlds (2005)
- The oil Wars
- The War of our Fathers
- Super Robot Wars
- Guild Wars
- Junkyard Wars
Most historians agree that the war of 1812+2 is most interesting. It showed how much the romans were able to completely dominate the Italian peninsula. The first battle took part in Massachusetts, in Northern France. In the battle, Rome fought against Britain for no reason. The romans fought harshly and forced the British to retreat. The romans, being as sneaky as they were, decided to send a blimp to track the army's path using their new technologies such as GPS and PCI-Express. Now, Hannibal and the romans had no blood to feed on. They decided to invade England. entered the Euphrateez river, to England, they took up their rifles and began to shoot upwards in the air. Since the British came to see what the fuss was about, the bullets were carefully placed and planned by Hannible to fall onto the British soldier's heads. The plan was extremely successful and came to be known as guerilla warfare. The romans eventually came across British parliament and tore it to pieces. They went to town on it. In result, Paul Revere shouted through Rome and Calabria that the British were defeated. However, this was a complete lie. The War of 1812+2 continued.
[edit] Modern-Day Rome
The Rome of today is much different to the Rome of hundred of years ago. This is a relief for tourists who are now free to 'Rome' around pretending they actually know what happened in the city that long ago. Tourists now make up over 90% of the population of Rome the remainder being made up of Popes and a few genuine Italians. Rome was recently renamed by the Mario Party to "Rad Ruined Roma", although this has not caught on. Urban myths indicate that Rome is one of two places where "everybody knows your name," the other being the NSA. To become one of the tourists just follow any road.
The restaurant industry of Rome has it's main revenue from exchanging forged bills to tourists. gaara
[edit] Food
Since the city was colonized by tourists the only food available is pizza which is consumed in obscene quantities. Over 12,000 tonnes of pizza is eaten every day in Rome and the largest Pizza available weighs around 16 tonnes. This was only ordered once by Ronald Reagan in the mid 1980's and tragically collapsed during bakery killing 122 tourists and completely destroying the Coliseum.
However, Romans have agreed Spaghetti is also a suitably stereotypical gaara
[edit] The fall of the Roman Empire
[edit] Quotessup |
