Rockefeller Family

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John D. Rockefeller 1885

John D. Rockefeller shortly before giving large piles of cash to dying people in Africa. Probably. No, that's right. He tricked them into giving HIM large piles of cash.

The Rockefeller Family are an ancient Banker Family, that is descendant of, David, Solomon, Queen of England, Amenhotep the IV of Egypt, Mickey Mouse, and occasionally Isra-el. Using their connections with other Banksters like J.P Morgan, they have reached the very top of the financial world, and their declared goal, is to gather all the earth's money at once so it loses all value (because if that were to happen, then all 7 billion other people in the world would've figured out a different form of commerce by then), and then give it all away to the poor, through their notorious charity network called "Ha ha, We Own You."

edit Name and Origin

The origin of the name is unclear. Some suggest that the name comes from the German "Rock a feller" which means "A groovy FAN of rock music and related music Genres". Other theories suggest they picked up the name from the medieval opera play "Rocky III, What a Fella".

Their origin is traced back to the time when the Elohim and Nephilim had sex with biblical women 6.000 years ago, and although their most recent relatives include Buddha, the Girl with the Matches, Mahatma Gandhi, Adolf Hitler and other humanitarian people, they insist on their alien origin from zeta reticuli.

Whatever the origin of the family name, Sir John Dee chose to reincarnate as John D. Rockefeller, from among all the other John D.'s of the world, becasue the name Rockefeller resembled John Dee's conception of the Kingdom of Heaven as a Rock fallen from Heaven. John Dee spent his whole life attempting to evoke angels to make the Rock fall from Heaven, so when presented with the chance to become the Rock through a bad pun, he could not resist. After fucking his mother while his father watched Rockefeller stuffed a one dollar bill in her wet pick pussy.

edit Activities

The Rockfellers, in their free time are land owners, bankers, oil producers, vice presidents, freemasons, and backgammon players. In their work life they are dealing with creating major financial disruptions in Europe, America,and other third world countries, in an effort to relieve the planet of all this excessive population that is not called Rockefeller. They also take active part in financing Hollywood movies with smart dogs, and aliens invading earth. Their assets are very hard to number.. America, Canada, Europe, Australia e.t.c. but their fever for excellent service for the community keeps them up to speed.

Despite all this wealth, the Rockefellers, are down-to-earth people. Their humility and modesty, have made history among their associates. In an attempt to win back favor of the Gods, the Rockefellers take active part in the Re-building of damaged peoples and Solomon temples, but they make sure that they first supply them with care.

Apart from owning half the planet, Rockefellers dream of a very simple heaven, were they rule infinite masses of infidels, and make extra profit.!!!

They also own a series of institutes in various places in the world, LSD labs, Cocaine Labs, etc. Including the recent organization they set up called PCATDC or Pedophiles for the Collection of Adrenalin Through Decapitation of Children. He aslo gave head to a maid in the Rockefeller Mansion.

edit Future

It is believed that when Rockefellers invest on something they mean it. Hence since they spent so much on space and army applications that NASA (NAZA) and others launch, there is only one answer. In 2012, hidden albino Rothschilds and Rockefellers, will board many USA made secret UFO's and finally rule the world using the anti-terrorist act of zeta reticuli. The Rockefellers are actively selling and buying money, souls and oil.

They have also been quoted in the New York Money, Wealth, & Satan Newspaper as saying: "We Rockefellers are beginning to run out of things to buy. We've already gone down the road of 'cars and mansions.' We've already done the 'drug binge for a decade.' We've already done the 'run the government via financial choke-holds.' We've even done the 'child prostitute ritual killing and blood drinking orgy for rich dudes.' Its starting to get old and I don't know what we'll buy next. We're running out of ideas......HA HA! I'm just kidding, all the things I said are ALWAYS great fun so we'll probably just continue to have Ferrari Mansion Orgies filled with satanic ritual drug binges involving North Korean children and blood balls. Oh, blood balls are cocaine and blood."

edit Family members

Ganesha 2

Ganesha Rockefeller was the most Republican of the family members, who proved that physical appearance is no obstacle at all, provided you've got enough bucks.

  • John D. Rockefeller, the scion of the family and the most famous capitalist of all time.
  • J.P. Morgan, John D.'s kid brother, who was always on the other side in playground games, but famously on the right side of the stock-market crash.
  • Nelson Rockefeller, the dim bulb of the family, who finally found a place as the replacement Vice President of a dim-bulb U.S. President.
  • Mr. Burns, the fabulously wealthy, perennial owner of the Springfield nuclear power plant where Homer Simpson works. Smithers praises him glowingly.
  • Uncle Scrooge Rockefeller-Duck, a usually stingy old duck in the eponymous kiddie television series. He gave each of his three nephews a nickel apiece on every visit — with a string attached to retrieve it from their pockets after the nice warm feeling had worn off.
  • Uncle Pennybags, the mascot of the Monopoly board game. His black suit is always meticulously pressed, as he only appears on flat cardboard (except for a cameo appearance in the rulebook).
  • Ganesha (pictured), the Hindu god of avarice.
Black sheep
  • V.I.P. Rockefeller-Lenin, the constantly rebelling cousin of the family and caretaker of the Rockefeller throne in Russia. He ensured his inheritance by sending all who might contest it to the notorious Gulag.
  • Robin Rockefeller-Hood, the poorest but kindest boy in the family.
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