Rich people
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“I'm not rich, I just have great mountains of cash in my livingroom that I like to play in. Remember that show Duck Tales anyone? It came out a few years after I died.”
~ J.P. Morgan on Rich people
“A rich person is defined as anyone who makes more than minimum wage. Unless they're me.”
~ A liberal on rich people
Rich people are assholes who fucked our economy up and screwed us on our taxes every year. If you see a rich person on the street, kick him in the balls or her in the overies
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[edit] How to identify rich people
- Eats at fancy restraunts every day.
- Has more than one house.
- Has a hat (the larger the richer).
- Carries around a very small and grotesquely deformed dog in their purse.
- Has a giant turd in a glass display case on their mantle above their pristine fireplace.
[edit] Characteristics
It should be noted that rich people have a strong dislike of not just physical labour, but of doing any work at all. Since they don't work and are very wasteful of their money (buying things like gold-embroidered toilet paper) it is unknown how they remain rich. recent research into the subject has discovered that they are in fact, paracites, leeching off society and not contributing anything, very similar to their polar opposite: the un-rich person.
[edit] How to identify an un-rich person
- Frequently urinates in a toilet not made out of gold (or a hole in the ground.)
- Can afford to eat (dog food) only once a day.
- They don't fuck their mothers... well, not too often anyways.
- They have minimal rights.
- Smell funny.
[edit] How to ingest
The most important step is to sever the subjects head if this step isn't preformed you may be eaten by the eyes of the rich person and become a new host body for the rich person. After the head is severed feed the head to a hobo. Then eat the body whole NO CHEWING!
That will release fungus spores from within the subjects stomach mainly shroom spores. After that you will have had five weeks worth of Fiber and Vitamin D.
Eating people is discouraged in most countries and will probably result in your friends (assuming you have any) rejecting you.
But hey! Think of the benefits Five weeks of not having to eat fiber, making your bowels very happy, and you will receive five weeks
of vitamin D meaning you won't have to go outside for five whole weeks. (you mainly get vitamin D from the suns UV rays and moldy tacos)
