Reservoir Dogs

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Revoir dogs2

The poster for Reservoir Dogs. Tarantino is dyslexic, hecne the speelign mistake

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Reservoir Dogs.
“Why am I Mr. Pink?”
~ Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi) on Reservoir Dogs
“Because you're a faggot, alright?”
~ Joe Cabot (Lawrence Tierney) on Reservoir Dogs

Reservoir Dogs is a 1992 film (or a 5753 film if you're Jewish) directed by Quentin Tarantino, written by Quentin Tarantino, produced by Quentin Tarantino, starring Quentin Tarantino, and with special guest director Quentin Tarantino. Other people in the film include Harvey Keitel, Tim Roth, Michael Madsen, Quentin Tarantino, Chris Penn, Steve Buscemi, Quentin Tarantino, and Lawrence Tierney.

Reservoir Dogs was a huge success, and paved the way for four sequels; Reservoir Dogs 2: The Return of Mr. Pink, Reservoir Dogs 4: Mr. White's Revenge, Reservoir Dogs 3: Vol II, and Reservoir Dogs VI: Monopoly Dawgs. Like the first film, the order of the sequels is all fucked up.

edit Original Conception

TarantinoReservoirDogs

The Reservoir Dogs get to work.

Tarantino originally intended the film to be a light-hearted comedy about a diamond heist gone wrong, with hilarious results. He later changed it to a not-so-light-hearted comedy about a diamond heist gone wrong, with not-so-hilarious results. With the help of Harvey Keitel, and several bank robberies, they managed to secure a budget of $1.2 million.

edit Plot

The film opens in a diner, with these guys in suits talking about Madonna and playing Monopoly and some shit. Then they start talking about old 70s music. Then one of them takes some book off some other guy, and he gets real pissed off. Then that guy from Fargo says he doesn't tip, but eventually he does. Then they leave. (Not much of an opening, is it?) But then come the opening credits. This is the best bit of the film. Here we see the guys in suits walking along a street in time to Little Green Bag. (Doo-doo-doo-duh-doo-doo-duh-doo-duh-doo.) It might not sound like much but they do it in - wait for it - slow motion. Now that's just badass. For real.

Right about now we hear some guy called Mr. Undercover Cop screaming that he's been shot, and Mr. Keitel tells him to shut the fuck up. Crybaby. See, they all have fake names so no-one knows who they are. I suppose the others never suspected Mr Undercover Cop could be, say ... a cop!? So anyway, Mr. Keitel drags him to the rendezvous point, and tries to comfort him. Then Mr. Undercover Cop asks Mr. Keitel to hold him. That bit's kinda gay. Then, Mr. Faggot shows up, and he tells the others that it might have been a set up.

No shit.

So, it's pretty boring at this point, until Mr. Psycho shows up. He's played by Michael Madsen, which makes him super cool. So cool that he stops for fast food after the diamond heist. Now that's cool. Mr. Psycho pulls a cop out of the trunk of his car (cue the trunk shot Tarantino uses in every movie), and they all start to beat him up. But, just as it's getting interesting, it goes all weird, and we travel back in time to earlier in the film. I didn't get that bit. I mean, why didn't they just show that bit first? Or maybe they forgot about it, and had to put it in at the last minute. Whatever. Now, I fell asleep for a bit, and missed a coupla minutes, but when I woke up,

Mr. Psycho turned on the radio. Then just to prove what a badass he is, he tortures the cop ... for no reason. While dancing to Stealers' Wheel. That's how cool he is. Cuts his ear off and everything, even though we don't actually get to see it. Bummer. Just as Mr Psycho is about to burn him alive and give us more reasons never to listen to "Stuck in the Middle" the same way again, Mr Undercover Cop shoots him to death. Then we get a flashback containing his entire life story; how he became an actor, him rehearsing his lines, him getting hired as a cop, him meeting the Thing, etc.

TarantinoDeath

He hasn't the slightest idea what you're talking about.

Then suddenly Not-So-Nice Guy Eddie comes back with Mr Professional and Mr Keitel. Not-So-Nice Guy Eddie is pissed that Mr Psycho is covered in bullets, since Mr Psycho borrowed his favourite white shirt, but Not-So-Nice Guy Eddie is wrongly convinced that the tied-up, handcuffed and disarmed policeman did it, so he shoots him dead. Take that, Mr "I've got a little kid at home" Policeman. Then Big Joe comes back, and he's pissed. It turns out that, unbelievably, Mr Undercover Cop was the undercover cop all along! Joe tries to shoot him, but Mr Keitel points his gun at him and Not-So-Nice Guy Eddie points a gun at him, creating a nasty exchange of "you shoot him, I'll shoot you". In the end, the shots are fired. Despite only two guns actually being fired, all three are dead, except for Mr Keitel, because main characters can survive bullets.

Mr Professional is the only one left. See that? The most unpopular guy there survived. He takes the diamonds and runs out of the warehouse. Mr Keitel crawls towards Mr Undercover Cop, who promptly tells him "Larry, I'm a cop". Mr Keitel is heartbroken, since he just killed two other guys just to prove this guy wasn't a cop. Mr Keitel plans to kill him, but police burst in and say "PUT THE GUN DOWN". Mr Keitel kills the policemen, takes Mr Undercover Cop to a hospital and they both reappear in Pulp Fiction, where Mr Undercover Cop robs a café.

So the film goes from "PUT THE FUCKING GUN DOWN! BAM BAM BAM" to "put da lime in da cocunut" just like that.

edit Cultural Impact

The film had a huge cultural impact. Oh yes. It did. At least on Monopoly players.

edit Goofs

CONTINUITY ERROR: Tim Roth's character's shirt is absolutely soaked with blood in one scene. Yet in the next scene, it's totally clean. Then it's covered in blood again in the next scene. Can't believe they didn't spot that.

FACTUAL ERROR: Marvin Nash gets his ear cut off by Mr. Yellow. Now, THAT IS AN ERROR!

EQUIPMENT VISIBLE: Boom-mike visible in the scene where they're all swearing a lot and shooting each other's skulls off. It actually hits Mr Yellow on the head and kills him - totally changing the plot of the film.

EQUIPMENT VISIBLE: One of the camera crew can clearly been seen in the rear-view mirror of the car just before Tarantino snuffs it. He's holding a sign saying "Hello mum".

CONTINUITY ERROR: If Joe shot Mr Orange, Mr White shot Joe, and Nice Guy Eddie shot Mr White, who shot Nice Guy Eddie?

edit Important Dialogue

Joe Cabot- Here are your names: Mr Happy , Mr Brave, Mr. Clever, Mr. Cheerful, Mr. Jelly, Mr. Silly, and Mr. Shut the Hell up before I beat the living Shit out of you with a stick.

Mr. Silly: Hey, why am I Mr. Silly?

Joe Cabot: Because you're a retard, alright?

Mr. Silly: I prefer Mr. Perfect to Mr. Silly. I'll be Mr Perfect.

Mr. Happy: Who the fuck cares what your name is?

Mr. Silly: Thats easy for you to say, you're Mr. Happy, you have a cool sounding name.

Joe Cabot: You're not Mr. Perfect, you're Mr. Silly.

Mr. Jelly: What about Mr. Jelly, I mean thats a bit to close to Mr. Gay, don't you think? Why can't we pick our own names?

Joe Cabot: No way, tried it once doesn't work. You get four guys all wanting to be Mr. Funny, and none of them know each other so no one wants to back down. No way, I PICK!

edit Unimportant Dialogue

Mr. White: Shit.

Mr. Blonde: Thanks.

Freddy Newandyke: What?

Mr Brown: Dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick.

Nice Guy Eddie: Is that a toothpick in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Mr. Blonde: ...Its a toothpick you idiot...

edit Soundtrack Info

  • And Now Little Green Bag... - Dialogue By Steven Wright
Note: not actually a song. Should not be counted as a soundtrack listing
  • Little Green Bag - George Baker
  • Little Gay Fag - Tim Wagner
  • Rock Flock Of Five - Dialogue By Steven Wright
Note: not actually a song either. Doesn't count
  • Hooked On A Feeling - Blue Suede
  • Bohemiath - Dialogue By Steven Wright
Again not actually a song.
  • I Gotcha - Joe Tex
  • Magic Carpet Ride - Bedlam
  • Madonna Speech - Dialogue By Quentin Tarantino
No, this isn't a song either.
  • Fool For Love - Sandy Rogers
  • Super Sounds - Dialogue By Steven Wright
Still not an actual song
  • Stuck In The Middle With You - Stealers Wheel
  • Harvest Moon - Bedlam
  • Let's Get A Taco - Dialogue By Harvey Keitel
No song here.
  • Keep On Truckin' - Dialogue By Steven Wright
More friggin' dialogue.
  • Coconut - Harry Nilsson
  • Home Of Rock - Dialogue By Steven Wright
What a gyp.
  • A Day That Will Live In Infamy Speech - Dialogue By Franklin Roosevelt

edit See also


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Reservoir Dogs is part of Uncyclopedia's series on Mass Media.
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