Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal.

By far the holiest portal you will ever find.



Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded man in the sky that flies around granting wishes, but there are some variations.

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edit Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

Dcp0402a
“He did too much LDS back in the Sixties.”
~ James T. Kirk on Spock
“Go forth and multiply!”
~ Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints on The Meaning of Life

Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is the official mascot for the Church of Later Day Saints, a satirical parody of the Roman Catholic Church (as if the Catholics weren't funny enough). He is essentially the same as regular Jesus, only he happens to be blonde and 100% pure, red-blooded American (not to be confused with Stephen Colbert). Disgruntled fans consider him an Expanded Universe addition only, and discount that Jesus ever had blonde hair, since he was a Palestinian Jew and all.

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Jesus on raptor
There is some confusion as to whether Jesus actually rode a raptor, or had a pack of attack raptors.


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Eh, it's fine, really. No big deal. I'm not offended.

~ God on Apatheism
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