Readme.txt

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 readme.txt                                           page 1 of 2
  --------------------------------------------------------------
 | WARNING! BE SURE TO READ THIS FILE THOROUGHLY BEFORE EDITING |
 |           ANY OF THE ARTICLES ON UNCYCLOPEDIA!               |
  --------------------------------------------------------------
 
  Further Warning: We really mean this. Don't just skim through.
        Read all of this or you will be blocked. Or worse.
 
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 UNCYCLOPEDIA VERSION HISTORY
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 1.0 - Jan 2005 - And God said let there be Uncyc
 1.1 - Jan 2005 - Added random insanity
                - Promoted me mates to admin status
 1.2 - Mar 2005 - Slaughtered some noobs
                - Generally enjoyed abusing power
                - Stuck two fingers up at Wickerpedia
 2.0 - Jul 2005 - Decided to copy code from Wikipedia
                - 'Borrowed' featured image and article ideas
 2.1 - Dec 2005 - Euroipods reskin thingy
                - Extra reference to copyright
 2.2 - Jan 2006 - Changed name to 'Uncyclopoopy'
 2.3 - Jan 2006 - Changed name back - it was crap
 2.4 - Feb 2006 - Appointed loads more minions
 2.5 - Mar 2006 - WORLD DOMINATION! 
                - Typos
 3.0 - Jun 2006 - Removed NRV tag. Idiot lowly users
 3.1 - Jul 2006 - Eliminated Benson
                - Added more legal threats and crud
 3.2 - Jul 2006 - Proofread - errors in speech to text software
 3.3 - Aug 2006 - Added more lists and random crud
                - More copyright references
 3.4 - Dec 2006 - New Year's crap
                - Only the worthy can seek the 
 3.5 - APR 2007 - Admins go ape shit crazy
                - They ban all users with the IP 127.0.0.1 
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
                ==============IMPORTANT==============
               |  READ EVRY SINGLE PART OF TIS FILE  |
               |      BEFORE EATING UNCYCLOPEDIA.    |
               |     THIS IS VEY IMPORTANT. I IS     |
               |  ESSENTIAL YOU REED AND UNDERSAND   |
               |        EVERY WORD. GOT TAT?         |
                =====================================
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 SYSTEM REQUIREMENTS
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 * Less than 200kb of RL (real life) Memory
 * Windows for Cavemen or later
 
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 INSTALLATION
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 * Locate the directory C:\Uncyclopedia and run the file named
   Uncyclopediainstallationfile00001onwheels!.exe.
 * Locate the file Supersecret Admin Page.unc and rename it
   Adminsaretehghay.dum.
 * Locate the file banpatrol.txt and blank it.
 * Follow on screen instructions very carefully word for wood.
 
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WARNING:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 !      Do not attempt to install Uncyclopedia manually.       !
 !  The program has been written by experienced progrmmers in  !
 !       the Developers programming language and thus is       !
 !            incomprehensible to you mere mortals.            !
 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 Register with Uncyclopedia.org for a minimal fee
 and receive regular updates on every single edit made as they
 happen
 
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 TROUBLESHOOTING
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 Oh, a troublemaker eh?
 Here is a CAQ (that stands for "Commonly Addressed Queries"):
 
 Q: Can I use Micro-Soft Word keyboard shortcuts?
 A: No, only WordStar mnemonics are supported. Sorry.
 
 Q: How do I access my user space?
 A: 1. Go to the Main program group
    2.  Open MS-DOS Executive
    3. Type A:/os2/usr/def/
    4. Press Shift+C to print the files
 
 Q: What happens if my subscription runs out?
 A: It's coin operated. Put more quarters in the machine,
    or go back to ED.
 
 Q: How do I report a bug?
 A: You can:
    -Dial-up connect to our bulletin board at (624) 555-8492.
    -Subscribe to our mailing list at
     listserv@uncyc.sympatico.net
 
 Q:Wheres page 2?
 A:You don't see it? It's right under your nose!
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 COPYRIGHT NOTICE - Important - Read or else!
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 This website is copyright Uncyclopedia 1995. Don't bloody well
 copy anything or I am coming round to your house and giving you
 a right good pasting. Yes, I can trace your IP using whois and 
 MY SPECIAL ADMIN TOOLS! HAHAH!
 
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 UNCYCLOPEDIA'S LEGAL TEAM
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 Jimbo Wales    Elvis                  An elite clan of Clinjas
 Jimbo Jones    The Fair Use Clause    Translation experts
 * You don't wanna come up against any of these now, do you?
   Thought not. Then be sure to read every last single word in
   this file. I SAID DO IT NOW.
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 OTHER IMPORTANT CRAP
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 * This readme file was written by OskaaWilde32.
 * E-mail me if you want to put a link to Uncyclopedia on your 
   website. Although it's pointless because Uncyclopedia is my
   baby and you're not having it, dumbo.
 * WWW.UNCYCLOPEDIA.ORG
 * OskaaWilde32@hotmail.co.uk
 * www.livejournal.com/users/OskaaWilde32
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                  __                    ________  ________  
     ____  ______|  | ______   _____    \_____  \ \_____  \ 
    /  _ \/  ___/|  |/ /\__ \  \__  \     _(__ <   /  ____/ 
   (  <_> )___ \ |    <  / __\  / __ \   /      \ /       \
    \____/____  >|__|_ \(____ \(____  \  \____  / \_______ \
              \/      \/     \/     \/        \/ Oskaa32  \/
 ---------------------------------------------------------------
 readme.txt                                          page 1 of 2


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This article was nominated to become a featured article; however, due to several votes being devoured by a mass of hyperlinks, it didn't make the cut (12/17). Don't let this happen again! For just pennies a day, you can prevent another travesty of this nature, or vote for other articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
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