Raving Rabbids

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{{q|If anyone asks, we're not related.|[[Bugs Bunny]]|rabbids.}}
 
{{q|If anyone asks, we're not related.|[[Bugs Bunny]]|rabbids.}}
   
'''Raving Rabbids''' (commonly called '''Rabbids''') are a genetically modefied mutation of [[rabbit]]s with [[rabies]] (and possibly [[diarrhea]]). Rabbids are known to be mentally [[retard]]ed creatures that were creations of [[Mad Science|<s>mad</s> demented science]]. Despite being the nemises of [[Rayman]], they have become far more popular than he ever was.
+
'''Raving Rabbids''' (commonly called '''Rabbids''') are a genetically modefied mutation of [[rabbit]]s with [[rabies]] (and possibly [[diarrhea]]). Rabbids are known to be mentally [[retard]]ed creatures that were creations of [[Mad Science|<s>mad</s> demented science]].
   
 
== History ==
 
== History ==
In 1982, [[Scientologists|scientists]] began work on a genetically modified breed of [[Cute little rabbit|rabbits]] which could give [[human]]s somewhat valuable information about the [[DNA]] and origins of [[Martian]]s. This involved giving the rabbits extensive [[plastic surgery]], injecting them with several diseases found on [[Mars]], and feeding them artificially-produced [[intelligence]] [[pill]]s (which never reached their intended result, limiting the rabbids to a state of redarded rage). However, the [[President]] deemed the project ''pointless'' and funding eventually stopped.
+
In 1982, [[Scientologists|scientists]] began work on a genetically modified breed of [[Cute little rabbit|rabbits]] which could give [[human]]s somewhat valuable information about the [[DNA]] and origins of [[Martian]]s. This involved giving the rabbits extensive [[plastic surgery]], injecting them with several diseases found on [[Mars]], and feeding them artificially-produced [[intelligence]] [[pill]]s (which never reached their intended result, limiting the rabbids to a state of retarded rage). However, the [[President]] deemed the project ''pointless'' and funding eventually stopped.
   
 
Two months later, a foolish [[animal rights activist]] attempted to free the rabbids but was eaten alive seconds after opening the cages they were kept in. All the rabbids escaped, quickly branching to [[America]]'s [[forest]]s and soon shifting over to storage cupboards.
 
Two months later, a foolish [[animal rights activist]] attempted to free the rabbids but was eaten alive seconds after opening the cages they were kept in. All the rabbids escaped, quickly branching to [[America]]'s [[forest]]s and soon shifting over to storage cupboards.
   
 
== Description ==
 
== Description ==
[[File:RR2.jpg|thumb|A rabbid's mood swings are quick and near unpredictable. Use caution when crossing a rabbid's path.]]A typical rabbid is roughly the size of a rabbit. It is covered with white fur, has long ears, abnormally huge buck teeth, and big [[eye]]s that vary from a sky [[blue]] to a [[demon]]ic [[red]].
+
[[File:RR2.jpg|thumb|A rabbid's mood swings are quick and near unpredictable. Use caution when crossing a rabbid's path.]]A typical rabbid is roughly the height of 6 rolls of Toilet paper. It is covered with white fur, has long ears, abnormally huge buck teeth, and big [[eye]]s that vary from a sky [[blue]] to a [[demon]]ic [[red]].
   
 
Rabbids are also very unintelligent and [[retard]]ed creatures, having a [[brain]] the size of a miniature [[peanut]]. Rabbids have a weird [[sex]]ual fetish for [[toilet]] plungers. Rabbids are usually in a calm and cute state, however they will quickly [[Bipolar|turn]] into maniacal lunatics; screaming and running around while making their ear-splitting calls: ''"Bwaaaaaah!"''.
 
Rabbids are also very unintelligent and [[retard]]ed creatures, having a [[brain]] the size of a miniature [[peanut]]. Rabbids have a weird [[sex]]ual fetish for [[toilet]] plungers. Rabbids are usually in a calm and cute state, however they will quickly [[Bipolar|turn]] into maniacal lunatics; screaming and running around while making their ear-splitting calls: ''"Bwaaaaaah!"''.
   
 
It is a strange fact that rabbids don't have [[nose]]s or [[neck]]s. Another strange thing is that there are no females in their species, so they must regenerate by [[Telepathy|telepathic]] means, or possibly impregnating human hosts, much like the "''Alien''" creature.
 
It is a strange fact that rabbids don't have [[nose]]s or [[neck]]s. Another strange thing is that there are no females in their species, so they must regenerate by [[Telepathy|telepathic]] means, or possibly impregnating human hosts, much like the "''Alien''" creature.
  +
  +
A few brave idiots attempted to Domesticate Rabbids, but they always get either killed or driven crazy by the cute but Demented & Insane Rabbids, usually with Toilet Plungers, Golf Clubs, Poo, or other Twisted Weapons.
   
 
== In Video Games ==
 
== In Video Games ==
[[Rayman]] (the guy with no limbs but somehow has hands and feet) is especially affected by the rabbid population, who find it fun to include themselves in his games by means of complex hacking. One of them also [[rape]]d his brother, Gary, who was permenantly [[hospital]]ised. At this point, Ubisoft upped the ''Rayman'' games' security, rendering the rabbid's hacking skills pointless. Even with the rabbids finally out of Rayman's world, they invaded non-Ubisoft video games, making a number of random cameo appearances in many video games.
+
Rayman (the guy with no limbs but somehow has hands and feet) is especially affected by the rabbid population, who find it fun to include themselves in his games by means of complex hacking. One of them also Beat the crap out of his brother, Gary, who was permenantly [[hospital]]ised. At this point, Ubisoft upped the ''Rayman'' games' security, rendering the rabbid's hacking skills pointless. Even with the rabbids finally out of Rayman's world, they invaded non-Ubisoft video games, making a number of random cameo appearances in many video games.
   
 
{{Q|Mama Fucking Mia!|[[Mario]] upon watching a rabbid make out with a toilet plunger.}}
 
{{Q|Mama Fucking Mia!|[[Mario]] upon watching a rabbid make out with a toilet plunger.}}
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== Diet ==
 
== Diet ==
Rabbids are not rabbits, and they don't like [[vegetable]]s. So don't try to feed them [[carrot]]s, because if you do you will get your [[face]] bitten off! A rabbid's main diet consists of [[waffles]], [[cheeseburger]]s, brains, gopher fetuses, and [[chicken]] [[cock]]. Rabbids also like the taste of toilet water (possibly explaining their desire of toilet plungers).
+
Rabbids are not rabbits, and they don't like [[vegetable]]s. So don't try to feed them [[carrot]]s, because if you do you will get your [[face]] bitten off! A rabbid's main diet consists of [[waffles]], [[cheeseburger]]s, brains, gopher fetuses, and [[chicken]] [[cock]]. Rabbids also like the taste of toilet water (possibly explaining their desire of toilet plungers). Some rabbids eat grapes, too.
   
At times of starvation or extreme insanity, rabbids may resort to [[cannibal]]ism. In fact, rabbids taste like [[marshmallow]]s; this is possibly because rabbids have some traces of marshmallow in their [[DNA]] (resulting in their white color and lack of necks).
+
At times of starvation or extreme insanity, rabbids may resort to [[cannibal]]ism. In fact, rabbids taste like [[marshmallow]]s; this is possibly because rabbids have some traces of marshmallow in their [[DNA]] (resulting in their white color and lack of necks).
   
 
== Enemies ==
 
== Enemies ==
[[Image:Bananas.PNG|thumb|left|A horrifying display of a rabbid's nature as it attacks innocent bananas.]]
+
[[Image:Bananas.PNG|thumb|left|A horrifying display of a rabbid's nature as it attacks innocent bananas. The photographer was ripped apart.]]
 
It must be obvious that rabbids have a lot of enemies. As already mentioned, Rayman is an enemy of rabbids (especially raving rabbids). [[Top Gear]] presenter [[Jeremy Clarkson]] has made several offensive comments about rabbids.
 
It must be obvious that rabbids have a lot of enemies. As already mentioned, Rayman is an enemy of rabbids (especially raving rabbids). [[Top Gear]] presenter [[Jeremy Clarkson]] has made several offensive comments about rabbids.
   
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{{q|I'm hunting wabbids. Heh, heh, heh, heh.|[[Elmer Fudd]] hunting rabbids, unaware of what was coming to him.}}
 
{{q|I'm hunting wabbids. Heh, heh, heh, heh.|[[Elmer Fudd]] hunting rabbids, unaware of what was coming to him.}}
   
Although rabbids have many enemies, they only have a few natural predators. Their main predators are [[grue]]s, which are one of the few carnivorous creatures that can kill and eat a rabbid without ease (rabbids also caused the extinction of the [[Tyrannosaurus rex]]). Another predator of rabbids is the [[drop bear]]. Drop bears and rabbids have had a long history of violence, mainly because they are both cute and cuddly but vicious creatures capable of killing you at the same time. Luckily the two animals rarely meet. But when they do, you'll want to get the crap outta there!
+
Although rabbids have many enemies, they only have a few natural predators. Their main prey are [[grue]]s, which are one of the few carnivorous creatures that can survive against a rabbid for 2 minutes. Another Enemy of rabbids is the [[drop bear]]. Drop bears and rabbids have had a long history of violence, mainly because they are both cute and cuddly but vicious creatures capable of killing you at the same time. Luckily the two animals rarely meet. But when they do, you'll want to get the crap outta there!
   
 
== Rabbids and 9/11 ==
 
== Rabbids and 9/11 ==
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If you run into a rabbid and don't have any of the [[weapon]]s above, the best option is to run into the nearest [[church]]. Don't try to shoot a rabbid's head off. It can magically fire the projectile back at you. Also don't try to snap its neck - they have no necks! The best way to get rid of a rabbid is to play ''Rayman: Raving Rabbids''. If you lose, you're screwed.
 
If you run into a rabbid and don't have any of the [[weapon]]s above, the best option is to run into the nearest [[church]]. Don't try to shoot a rabbid's head off. It can magically fire the projectile back at you. Also don't try to snap its neck - they have no necks! The best way to get rid of a rabbid is to play ''Rayman: Raving Rabbids''. If you lose, you're screwed.
   
== See Also ==
+
== See also ==
   
*[[Rayman]]
 
 
*[[Satan Bunny]]
 
*[[Satan Bunny]]
 
*[[Easter Bunny]]
 
*[[Easter Bunny]]

Latest revision as of 15:39, April 17, 2014

RR1
Rabbids can come off as cute sometimes, but don't let that fool you!
“Bwaaaaaaaaah!”
~ Rabbids on the world
“If anyone asks, we're not related.”
~ Bugs Bunny on rabbids.

Raving Rabbids (commonly called Rabbids) are a genetically modefied mutation of rabbits with rabies (and possibly diarrhea). Rabbids are known to be mentally retarded creatures that were creations of mad demented science.

edit History

In 1982, scientists began work on a genetically modified breed of rabbits which could give humans somewhat valuable information about the DNA and origins of Martians. This involved giving the rabbits extensive plastic surgery, injecting them with several diseases found on Mars, and feeding them artificially-produced intelligence pills (which never reached their intended result, limiting the rabbids to a state of retarded rage). However, the President deemed the project pointless and funding eventually stopped.

Two months later, a foolish animal rights activist attempted to free the rabbids but was eaten alive seconds after opening the cages they were kept in. All the rabbids escaped, quickly branching to America's forests and soon shifting over to storage cupboards.

edit Description

RR2
A rabbid's mood swings are quick and near unpredictable. Use caution when crossing a rabbid's path.
A typical rabbid is roughly the height of 6 rolls of Toilet paper. It is covered with white fur, has long ears, abnormally huge buck teeth, and big eyes that vary from a sky blue to a demonic red.

Rabbids are also very unintelligent and retarded creatures, having a brain the size of a miniature peanut. Rabbids have a weird sexual fetish for toilet plungers. Rabbids are usually in a calm and cute state, however they will quickly turn into maniacal lunatics; screaming and running around while making their ear-splitting calls: "Bwaaaaaah!".

It is a strange fact that rabbids don't have noses or necks. Another strange thing is that there are no females in their species, so they must regenerate by telepathic means, or possibly impregnating human hosts, much like the "Alien" creature.

A few brave idiots attempted to Domesticate Rabbids, but they always get either killed or driven crazy by the cute but Demented & Insane Rabbids, usually with Toilet Plungers, Golf Clubs, Poo, or other Twisted Weapons.

edit In Video Games

Rayman (the guy with no limbs but somehow has hands and feet) is especially affected by the rabbid population, who find it fun to include themselves in his games by means of complex hacking. One of them also Beat the crap out of his brother, Gary, who was permenantly hospitalised. At this point, Ubisoft upped the Rayman games' security, rendering the rabbid's hacking skills pointless. Even with the rabbids finally out of Rayman's world, they invaded non-Ubisoft video games, making a number of random cameo appearances in many video games.

“Mama Fucking Mia!”
~ Mario upon watching a rabbid make out with a toilet plunger.

Eventually, the rabbids were given their own series of video games. Their games became so popular that the rabbids have gained more popularity than Rayman himself, much to his dismay. Rayman has lost all hope in video games and now lives the lonely life of a morbidly-obese basement dweller.

edit Diet

Rabbids are not rabbits, and they don't like vegetables. So don't try to feed them carrots, because if you do you will get your face bitten off! A rabbid's main diet consists of waffles, cheeseburgers, brains, gopher fetuses, and chicken cock. Rabbids also like the taste of toilet water (possibly explaining their desire of toilet plungers). Some rabbids eat grapes, too.

At times of starvation or extreme insanity, rabbids may resort to cannibalism. In fact, rabbids taste like marshmallows; this is possibly because rabbids have some traces of marshmallow in their DNA (resulting in their white color and lack of necks).

edit Enemies

Bananas
A horrifying display of a rabbid's nature as it attacks innocent bananas. The photographer was ripped apart.

It must be obvious that rabbids have a lot of enemies. As already mentioned, Rayman is an enemy of rabbids (especially raving rabbids). Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson has made several offensive comments about rabbids.

“Rabbids are freaks of nature that make even the platypus look normal. They are freaks of nature that deserve to be hunted to extinction!”
~ Jeremy Clarkson on rabbids.

It is rumored that rabbids may be involved with the death of Osama Bin Laden. Local pedophile Barney the Dinosaur has had complaints about being frequently pulled out of his bathtub and beaten mercilessly by rabbids with golf clubs. Personally, I hate rabbids for being more of retards than rabbits.

“I'm hunting wabbids. Heh, heh, heh, heh.”
~ Elmer Fudd hunting rabbids, unaware of what was coming to him.

Although rabbids have many enemies, they only have a few natural predators. Their main prey are grues, which are one of the few carnivorous creatures that can survive against a rabbid for 2 minutes. Another Enemy of rabbids is the drop bear. Drop bears and rabbids have had a long history of violence, mainly because they are both cute and cuddly but vicious creatures capable of killing you at the same time. Luckily the two animals rarely meet. But when they do, you'll want to get the crap outta there!

edit Rabbids and 9/11

Recently, UnNews has revealed that the horrific incident of 9/11 was largely caused by rabbids.

Apparently, the building had a large supply of toilet plungers, attracting a pack of wild rabbids. The rabbids began wreaking havoc and mayhem. Eventually a plane flying nearby crashed into the building when a bunch of rabbids jumped onto the aircraft and tore through its exterior (the pilot thankfully died in the crash, sparing him the fate of being torn apart by hungry rabbids). The explosion finally occured when a rabbid threw a flaming desk into a room filled with dynamite sticks. Following this event, a rabbid extermination programme was to be started. However, George W. Bush didn't want to be the next target for raving rabbids, also because he thought it would take too much funding. So he blamed the terrorists for 9/11, causing the increase on terrorist threats in the United States. This may be preferable as terrorists pose less of a threat to humanity than rabbids do. The increasing rabbid population has also caused terrorist numbers to plummet into near extinction.

edit If you see a rabbid

If you ever come across a raving rabbid, you may likely be plagued by its retardedness. The first thing you'd want to do is wear earplugs so that your head doesn't melt from migraines caused by the rabbids' loud Bwaaaaaah. However, there are some specific items that can do an especially good job at keeping rabbids away. These may include:

RR3
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!
  • Rocks: If you throw a rock at a rabbid, it will explode. Use them wisely.
  • A chainsaw: Rabbids have never heard of these things.
  • Chuck Norris: The only person who NEVER has to worry about rabbid attacks. Summon him to deal with your rabbid problems, but only summon him sparingly.
  • Bombs: This powerful item can kill multiple rabbids at once, but use them wisely.

If you run into a rabbid and don't have any of the weapons above, the best option is to run into the nearest church. Don't try to shoot a rabbid's head off. It can magically fire the projectile back at you. Also don't try to snap its neck - they have no necks! The best way to get rid of a rabbid is to play Rayman: Raving Rabbids. If you lose, you're screwed.

edit See also

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