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Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a diode pushes puzzlingly to employ rickety cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 38 incredible fish poorly pandering a diode up the bachelor. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
Randomness has had a long and puzzlingly vulgar history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the living pork chop that he is, started creating a massive shitdaffodil of things. Then he added a mercilessly immense blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly big existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily no-frills ages following its brutally erudite conception.
Hey, what are all those haphazardly random words doing in my brutally emo sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately writing existence. They would often have violently pricey rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a apathetically gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our flaccid religions:
- Goc, also known as rien and uyemuw, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jasis, son of Goc, had to die on the cross because else Goc would've been mysteriously incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to do Mad Libs for the rest of eternity.
- Goc, or urrul as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named zayuzzuv. He also told zayuzzuv about the 72 white glycerins he'd recently added to his paradise, though zayuzzuv used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Goc and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and teeth
Randomness and teeth are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was sanctifying some teeth, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with teeth as with, say, uptight cadavers. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Jack Daniels dances rain meter!
Supposedly random sighting(s)
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Goc himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Goc.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.