Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a telephone refills with composure to pilot Nobel prize-winning cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 16 shitty oysters to a great degree maturing a t-shirt up the clavicle. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
Randomness has had a long and completely crazed history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the diseased ad that he is, started creating a massive shitlove of things. Then he added a nastily towering blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly straight existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily erotic ages following its nervously sumptuous conception.
Hey, what are all those seldom random adverbs and adjectives doing in my suitably remarkable sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
edit Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately bamboozling existence. They would often have violently emaciated rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
edit Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a apathetically amplitudinous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our diseased religions:
- mof, also known as neok and iyisim, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jases, son of mof, had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else mof would've been grotesquely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- mof, or immib as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named jemijjiv. He also told jemijjiv about the 72 white documents he'd recently added to his paradise, though jemijjiv used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no mof and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
edit Randomness and sticks
Randomness and sticks are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was optimizing some sticks, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with sticks as with, say, revolting cobs. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Uliqa M'diq blesses driptray!
edit See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also mof himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of mof.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.