Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an electron duels boorishly to putrefy boring cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 59 slimy clones neurotically agreeing a boat up the wall. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
Randomness has had a long and quickly abnormal history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the defenestratable pie that he is, started creating a massive shitquote of things. Then he added a neurotically amplitudinous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly defensive existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily pricey ages following its poorly unnatural conception.
Hey, what are all those briskly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my carefully posh sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
edit Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately breaking existence. They would often have violently remarkable rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
edit Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a badly gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our trusty religions:
- woc, also known as vean and owusos, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- bufof, son of woc, had to die on the suicide bomber because else woc would've been ruthlessly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to relax for the rest of eternity.
- woc, or onnor as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named fakoffoc. He also told fakoffoc about the 72 white homicidal screaming carrots he'd recently added to his paradise, though fakoffoc used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no woc and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
edit Randomness and fish
Randomness and fish are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was raping some fish, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with fish as with, say, nude jellybeans. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the bollocks. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart rebels titty!
edit See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also woc himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of woc.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.