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Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a blow-up doll oscillates cryptically to stir substandard cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 37 shaky beach balls (in an unimpressed manner) raping a rifle up the PlayStation. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
Randomness has had a long and explosively gay history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the flammable rifle that he is, started creating a massive shitbook of things. Then he added a fretfully gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly uninviting existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily baffling ages following its rhythmically flammable conception.
Hey, what are all those rapidly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my rapidly puce sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately suffocating existence. They would often have violently hateful rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a senselessly gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our huge religions:
- jab, also known as wiak and ukomui, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- jeses, son of jab, had to die on the telephone pole because else jab would've been fervently incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Pluto to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- jab, or uddug as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named licullun. He also told licullun about the 72 white violi he'd recently added to his paradise, though licullun used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no jab and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and Euroipods
Randomness and Euroipods are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was mystifying some Euroipods, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with Euroipods as with, say, senseless rifles. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the copypasta in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Papa Doc proves person!
Supposedly random sighting(s)
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also jab himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of jab.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.