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Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a virus agrees quickly to clapperclaw mediocre cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 39 coruscating lawn mowers (in an unimpressed manner) legislating a home theater system up the page. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
Randomness has had a long and haphazardly quick history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the Pastafarian home theater system that he is, started creating a massive shitalgorithm of things. Then he added a crazily immense blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly implosive existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily belittling ages following its severely contrived conception.
Hey, what are all those peacefully random adverbs and adjectives doing in my acceptably emaciated sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately litigating existence. They would often have violently cut-rate rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a fortissimo colossal connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our defensive religions:
- muy, also known as geot and ecosee, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jeses, son of muy, had to die on the telephone pole because else muy would've been oddly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Isle of Man to fornicate for the rest of eternity.
- muy, or ebbel as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named regerrem. He also told regerrem about the 72 white fissile uranium samples he'd recently added to his paradise, though regerrem used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no muy and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and computers
Randomness and computers are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was blessing some computers, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with computers as with, say, revolting delicious pies. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. BIG FAT DICK sniffs Suzuki!
Supposedly random sighting(s)
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also muy himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of muy.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.