Random humor

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<div style="float: left;">[[Image:Vadersegway2.jpg|100px|none|Wiktionary|]]</div>
<div style="margin-left: 60px;">[[WTF]] is this template. I have no [[sexual relations|idea]]. Anyway, look at [[James Spader|Darth Vader]].</div>
[[image:BananaPhone.jpg|right|thumb|Painting a [[Playstation 3]] [[controller]] [[yellow]], then pretending it is a [[phone]], is a good example of random humor.]]
'''Random humor''' is a type of humor which [[Special:Randompage|is]] ''[[Randomness|random]]''. It is unique in that it is the only type of humor that is an ingredient in [[Jell-O]]. It is best known for being similar to [[Mountain Dew]] in that it has no use in solving a [[maze]].
==How random humor was invented==
Random humor [[was invented by]] [[John Mellencamp]] in [[1973]] as a way of ending [[poverty]] in [[Amsterdam]]. He asked a group of [[Kuwaiti Migit Ninjas]] to kill [[Harvey M. Rabbit]] so that he could access the [[Bermuda Triangle]]. Once this happened, he went there and found a [[hamburger]]. But not just any hamburger. No, it was the Hamburger of Legends. The Hamburger of Legends was rumoured to have the power of 51 [[weapons of mass distraction]], and it could even turn any [[CD]] into [[Reggae]]! With this power, Mellencamp was clearly able to get on the '''Second [[Internet]]''' and download [[Paris Hilton]] and have lots of [[stoner]] sex.
After hitting climax, Mellencamp had a vision caused by having too many [[Snuffleupagus|Snuffleupagi]] in the room. He envisioned a humor so humorous that it would go back in time and make [[beard]]s from [[1930]] laugh. Unfortunately, this made [[Purple Jesus]] angry, so he threw [[dolphins]] at Mellencamp. He threw them so hard that Mellencamp flew all the way to [[Germany]] from the forceback. (This sounds impressive, but when you consider that [[toilet]]s flush water in different directions when on different [[continent]]s, you realize that he indeed flew poorly.)
While in Germany, Mellencamp found a [[vaporizer]] and used it to destroy the [[evil]] [[tiger]] who was about to eat a [[refrigerator]]. He opened it up and found 35 [[gold]] pieces and seven [[whale]]s. He used these to make '''gold whale gum'''. Because of this feat, he ensured that he would have an article in [[The Uncyclopedia]], and thus he justified his own life. With that, he spent the rest of his life in content, until [[IRC]] was invented, then he spent the rest of his life in a giant statue of [[George Washington]].
Then in 1973, he invented random humor.
==History of random humor==
Throughout [[history]], random humor has had numerous effects on [[Jarlsberg]] [[cheese]]. The most famous event that random humor was involved in was in [[1899]], when a [[dachshund]] fought a [[Pikachu]] to the [[death]]. If random humor was not invented in the [[future]], there is no way the dachshund could have won. This is why most [[FUCKTARDS]] say a [[prayer]] to the [[Even Supremer Court]] for being a [[court]] and not a [[monkey]] in [[Al Qaeda]], which would have stopped random humor from coming into [[existence]].
Another event which can be attributed to random humor is the infamous [[Axis of Evil Hot Dog Eating Competition]] of [[1996]]. In this year, [[Pink Floyd]] did not enter, thus ensuring a win for [[Bob Dole]], even though he hates the [[Axis of Evil]] because he is part of the '''Axis of [[Amish]]'''. However, he performed like a [[sugar]]-covered [[cigarette]] in a [[professional wrestling]] match. The reason? Some say it is because random humor caused him to laugh and spit out [[hot dog]]s. Others say it is because he is [[allergies|allergic]] to hot dogs. Still others say it is because these are [[weasel words]]. Who knows? (Besides [[J.R.R. Tolkien]], who knows [[everything]] that [[nobody]] knows, but his opinion doesn't count because he's been [[cowation|cowated]], so don't mention him, [[smartass]].)
[[image:Mc_rodan.jpg|right|thumb|People don't seem to understand just how thoroughly MC Rodan can get down.]]
Some events which random humor played absolutely no role in include the [[birth]] of [[Matt Groening]], the [[extreme wet t-shirt lawn bowling]] contest of [[1927]], the writing of [[John Cage]]'s [[4'33"]], and [[God]] creating the [[universe]]. This list may or may not be inclusive.
==Modern applications of random humor==
Random humor is believed to be a [[popular]] way to get rid of [[old people]]. It has surpassed [[Smurfs]] in terms of effectiveness, but it is still not as popular as [[Bill O'Reilly]] or even the [[University of California]]. In a year or so, there'll be [[commercial]]s trying to increase awareness of random humor by showing a [[man]] in a suit suggesting that you use random humor by listing its benefits while ignoring its drawbacks. This is shown to be the most effective way of [[marketing]].
Random humor is not currently allowed in the [[United Spades of Amerika]], where [[Winston Churchill]] has declared a [[war]] on random humor, even though he's [[dead]] and lives in [[Great Britain]]. Currently random humor is winning the war, especially since the Battle of Blue Pyramid, where [[Oprah Harpo 5932]] seceded from the United Spades and [[stapler|stapled]] an [[apostrophe]] to the United Spades commander. This is the biggest blow that random humor has dealt since it called [[Orrin Hatch]] a [[poop]][[head]], which hurt his feelings.
Conversely, random humor is very welcome in [[Mediocre Britain]].
[[Image:Pjp2c.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Pope John Paul 2.0]] on March 10, 1999. Still trying to rule but soon becoming the Cyber-Pope]]
==Random humor in the future==
Random humor has not yet decided what it wants to [[job|be]] when it grows up. Currently, it states that it desires to be a [[battery]] maker, or maybe just a battery. This is because it wants to have a job related to assault. [[Brad Pitt]] said that he thinks it would make a good [[poet]], although [[Tom Cruise]] disagrees. This disagreement caused the [[Actor's Gang War]].
Random humor is thought to be known only to [[human]]s, [[grue]]s, and [[cabbage]], it is expected to be translated to [[quail]] in 2100. It is not known whether quails will get random humor or not, but so far the outlook is not good: [[Dan Quayle]] does not understand random humor in the least.
'''See also:''' [[Randomness]]
{{Bat Fuck Insane}}

Revision as of 03:15, September 5, 2005

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