From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
“A man who spent so much money behind pens and papers that he had none left to buy scissors and razors.”
Rabindranath Tagore (7 May 1861 – 7 August 1941), sobriquet Gurudev, was a spoiled brat from a rich family in India. It is said that he was very much inspired by hip-hop music, which is apparent in his hairstyle and attempts to write lyrics. He bought the Nobel Prize with his enormous amount of fortune inherited from his father and some cleverly plotted schemes.
edit Early life
Born in 7th May 1861 to a rich family with a golden spoon in his mouth. He grew up under the shades of extreme care and over-protectiveness that led him to believe that he knew enough about the reality and sufferings of the world to become a writer. Partially because of the belief that he knew about the whole world by living under the roofs of a palace, and partially because of his growing passion for the pop culture, he managed to grow a knack for writing poetry and fiction at a very early age.
His first decent writing ever, was the two line poetry "Jol Pore, Pata Nore (Water Drips, Leaf Flips)" which gave him so much self-inspiration that he chose take writing as his profession in later life. But poetry and rhyming was not new to his family as he inherited his talent from his father, Denbendranath Tagore, whose rhyming is apparent in even his son's name (Denbendranath- Rabindranath, see, they rhyme right?).
edit Later life
Rabindranath Tagore travelled to Britain to study and acquire knowledge. The ever present irony of him visiting an English-speaking country to study and become a Bengali writer is overlooked by the history and modern society. He visited over several countries and made foreign friends strategically, so that his poor writing standards are overlooked throughout the whole world and gain him an access to the fabled Nobel Prize.
His writings as well as his lifestyle, were greatly inspired by the hip-hop music. But due to the fact that his writing skills royally suck, he ended up composing slow music and lyrics. Eventually he and his writing was accepted by fans, who's motto are "Incomprehension is a bliss."
Most of his famous works of poetry are regarded, as desperate attempts to make himself heard, as wise and heavenly literature by his fans with blind-faith. But his song compositions were gifts to this world and are considered by all as blessings. His highly-lagging songs helped people all over the world, get a good night's sleep. Recent research showed that Tagore's Songs(Rabindrashangit) is the best sedative available in the whole and can induce sleep in even an insomniac. He is considered the very best in summing up bullshit in the form of short stories and novels that are later considered as his works. It is estimated that 90% of the bullshit in written Bangla texts come from Rabindranath Tagore. His fictions are as far-fetched as his idle mind can conjure and thus are depictions of complete impossible and a collection of nonsense.
Tagore's favorite hobby is writing National Anthems for neighboring countries and virtually neglecting his own. This has speculated belief among many that he lacks the sheer patriotism that most of the contemporary writers had. This act is sometimes considered as treason but it did not stop him from writing Amar Shonar Bangla for a neighboring country to be used as a National Anthem.
edit The Nobel Prize
Tagore won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1913. Despite his questionable writing abilities, he was awarded the Prize for his large number of hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophiliac(People who love long words) fans, his strategically made friends over different nations (including the punk-rock inspired Albert Einstein) and for the enormous sum he
bribed donated spent behind this cause.
edit Political views
Tagore was an ardent follower of feminism but could never take part in any activities due to the fact that he was a male specimen. But he continued his support on these movements repeatedly in his writings. Over and over in his writings he depicted the male specimens as traitorous, heartless and cruel beings while females being the victims, philanthropists and reverend.
Other than that, he had his own political methods that he practiced and followed throughout his whole life in order to attain the honor of being a Nobel Laureate and a famed writer.
Rabindranath Tagore's most profitable business investment was his death in 1941, upon which, even his drafts and personal letters were sold in auctions, gathered and accumulated into forms of books. His only regret was that he could not see the World War II and he so liked action movies. But due to a shortage of money (caused by the investment towards the Nobel Prize), he had to make this investment earlier. This investment further brought organizations, such as, Shantiniketan to life and thus is considered as the investment of the century by eminent economists.
|It's about time.|
—Rabindranath Tagore, after claiming the Nobel Prize
|Rabindranath + Fat Wallet + Grey Hairs = Noble Prize|
|By plucking her petals, you do not gather the beauty of the flower. You gather the beauty by plucking the whole flower over and over again until you have a bouquet.|
—Rabindranath Tagore, on plucking flowers
|Those who own much, have much to fear. I am fearless in terms of talent.|
|All that is good in this world, half of it is done by women and half of it is done by me(n). I added the 'n' out of modesty.|
—Rabindranath Tagore, a comment on a quote of his
|Hip-hop music fills the infinite between two souls.|
—Rabindranath Tagore, on hip-hop music
|Love is an endless mistery, for it has nothing else to explain it. There has been a typo, it should be "misery" not "mistery".|
—Rabindranath Tagore, a comment on another quote
A nation united by virtually nothing, please
|States: Chandigarh • East Bengal • Kashmir • Kerala • Maharashtra • Mizoram • Nepal • Uttar Pradesh • Tibet • Tulu Nadu|
|Religions: Buddhism • Hinduism • Tantra • Zoroastrianism|
|Funny guys: Barkha Dutt • Mohandas Gandhi • Nathuram Godse • Rudyard Kipling • Dalai Lama • Rabindranath Tagore • Mother Teresa|
|A zoo-full of deities: Allah • Ganesha • Hanuman • Kali|
|Languages: Engrish • Hindi • Sanskrit • Telugu|
|Other stuffs: Bangalore • Bhagavad-gita • Bollywood • Cricket • Brahmin • Curry • Football • Holi • Indian hippies • Indian Institutes of Technology • Jat • Mango • Ramayana • Rock • Rupees • The Times • Turban • Urumi • VJTI|